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Atlantis: The Lost Empire Quotes

Atlantis: The Lost Empire is a television program that debuted in 1970 . Atlantis: The Lost Empire completed its run in 1970.

It features Don Hahn as producer, and James Newton Howard in charge of musical score.

Atlantis: The Lost Empire is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Atlantis: The Lost Empire is 95 minutes long. Atlantis: The Lost Empire is distributed by Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures.

The cast includes: Don Novello as Vinny, Michael J. Fox as Milo, Jim Varney as Cookie, Florence Stanley as Wilhelmina, and Jacqueline Obradors as Audrey.

Atlantis: The Lost Empire Quotes

Jim Varney as Cookie

  • (Jim Varney) "Sweet mother of Jefferson Davis."
  • (Jim Varney) "Main course."
  • (Jim Varney) "Don't you worry. It'll keep, and keep, and keep."
  • (Jim Varney) "You're so skinny, if you turned sideways and stuck out your tongue, you'd look like a zipper."
  • (Jim Varney) "For the appetizer, Caesar salad, escargot, and your Oriental spring rolls."
  • (Jim Varney) "I seen this back in the Dakotas. They can smell fear just by lookin' atcha."
  • (Jim Varney) "So keep quiet."
  • (Jim Varney) "Blondie, I've got a bone to pick with you."
  • (Helga) "Hold that thought."
  • (Helga) "What is it this time, Cookie?"
  • (Jim Varney) "You done stuffed my wagon full to bustin' with nonessentials. Look at all this. Cinnamon, oregano, ci-lantro. What in the cockadoodle is ci-lantro?"
  • (Jim Varney) "I got your four basic food groups. Beans, bacon, whisky and lard."
  • (Jim Varney) "Dang lightnin' bugs done bit me on my sit-upon. Somebody's gonna have to suck out this poison. Now don't everybody jump up at once."

Jacqueline Obradors as Audrey

  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "Ah-ha. Two for flinching."
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "I thought you said this thing could cut through a femur in twenty-eight seconds."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Less talk, more saw."
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "Where are you going?"
  • (Michael J. Fox) "I'm going after Rourke."
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "Milo, that's crazy."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "I didn't say it was the smart thing, but it is the right thing."
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "Wow. Look at all those tattoos."
  • (Jim Varney) "Shoot. That ain't nothin'. Look here what I got."
  • (Jim Varney) "All 38 United States. Watch me make Rhode Island dance."
  • (Jim Varney) "Go on, baby, dance. Dance."
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "Hey, Milo. Don't you ever close that book?"
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Yeah, you must've read it a dozen times by now"
  • (Michael J. Fox) "I know, but this -- this doesn't make any sense. See, in this passage here, the shepherd seems to be leading up to something. He calls it the Heart of Atlantis. It could be the power source the legends refer to. But then it just -- it cuts off. It's almost like there's a missing page."
  • (Don Novello) "Kid, relax. We don't get paid overtime."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "I know, I know. Sometimes I get a little carried away. But, hey, you know, that's what this is all about, right? I mean, discovery, teamwork, adventure. Unless, maybe, you're just in it for the money."
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "Money."
  • (Florence Stanley) "Money."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Money."
  • (Mole) "Money."
  • (Don Novello) "I'm gonna say -- money."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Well, I guess I set myself up for that one."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Ooh. I like her."
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "Hm. 'Bout time someone hit him. I'm just sorry it wasn't me."

Don Novello as Vinny

  • (Helga) "Someone needs to talk to that girl."
  • (Mole) "I will go."
  • (Don Novello) "Someone with good people skills."
  • (Mole) "I will do it."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Someone who won't scare her away."
  • (Mole) "I volunteer."
  • (Florence Stanley) "Someone who can speak the language."
  • (Mole) "For the good of the mission, I will go."
  • (Commander Rourke) "Good man, Thatch. Thanks for volunteering."
  • (Don Novello) "We done a lot of things we're not proud of. Robbing graves, eh, plundering tombs, double parking. But, nobody got hurt. Well, maybe somebody got hurt, but nobody we knew."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Hold on. Back up. Are you sayin' this whole volcano can blow at any time?"
  • (Mole) "No, no, no, no. That would take an explosive force of great magnitude."
  • (Don Novello) "Maybe I should do this later, huh?"
  • (Don Novello) "I could unblock that if I had, like, two-hundred of these. Problem is, I only have, like, ten, plus three of my own, a couple of cherry bombs, road flare -- Hey. Too bad we don't have some nitroglycerin, eh, Milo?"
  • (Mole) "AH HA HA HA."
  • (Don Novello) "You got something sporty? You know, like a tuna?"
  • (Don Novello) "Well, as far as me goes, I just like to blow things up."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Come on, Vinny. Tell the kid the truth."
  • (Don Novello) "My family owned a flower shop. We would sell roses, carnations, baby's breath, you name it. One day, I'm making about three dozen corsages for this prom, you know, the one they put on the wrist, and everybody, they come. "Where is it?", "When is it?", "Does it match my dress?" It's a nightmare. Anyway, I guess there was this leak next door of gas or what. BOOM. No more Chinese laundry. Blew me right through the front window. It was like a sign from God. I found myself that boom."
  • (Preston B. Whitmore) "Now, let's go over it again, just so we got it straight: you didn't find anything."
  • (Don Novello) "No. Just a lot of rocks. And fish, little fish. Sponges."
  • (Preston B. Whitmore) "What happened to Helga?"
  • (Jim Varney) "Well, we lost her when a flaming zeppelin come down on her --"
  • (Jim Varney) "Uh, missing."
  • (Preston B. Whitmore) "That's right. And Rourke?"
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Nervous breakdown. You could say he went all to pieces."
  • (Jim Varney) "In fact, you could say he was transmogrified and then busted into a zillion --"
  • (Jim Varney) "He's missing too."
  • (Mole) "The volcano, she awakes."
  • (Don Novello) "Hey, I had nothing to do with it."
  • (Don Novello) "You didn't just drink that, did you?"
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Mm-hmm."
  • (Don Novello) "That's not good. That's nitroglycerin."
  • (Don Novello) "Don't move, eh, don't breathe, don't do anything. Except pray, maybe --"
  • (Mole) "BOOM."

Michael J. Fox as Milo

  • (Michael J. Fox) "Carrots? Why is it always carrots? I didn't even eat carrots."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "How was my accent?"
  • (Princess Kida) "Boorish, provincial, and you speak it through your nose."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "This is an illustration of the Leviathan, the creature guarding the entrance to Atlantis."
  • (Don Novello) "With something like that I would have white wine, I think."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "We can't let him do this."
  • (Don Novello) "Wait a second."
  • (Don Novello) "Okay, now you can go."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Will you look at the size of this? It's gotta be half a mile high, at least. It-It must have taken hundred- No, thousands of years to carve this thing."
  • (Don Novello) "Hey, look, I made a bridge. It only took me like, what? Ten seconds? Eleven, tops."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "I know, why don't you translate, and I'll wave the gun around."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Okay. Here's the plan. We're gonna come in low and fast and take 'em by surprise."
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "Well, I've got news for you, Milo. Rourke is never surprised and he's got a lot of guns."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Great. Well, do you have any suggestions?"
  • (Don Novello) "Yeah. Don't get shot."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "It's a mythical sea serpent. He's described in the Book of Job. The- The Bible says -- "Out of his mouth go burning lights -- sparks of fire shoot out." But more likely it's a carving or, a sculpture to frighten the superstitious."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "I'll have to quit my job."
  • (Preston B. Whitmore) "It's done. You resigned this afternoon."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "I did?"
  • (Preston B. Whitmore) "Yep. Don't like to leave loose ends."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Oh, my apartment. I-I'm gonna have to give a notice."
  • (Preston B. Whitmore) "Taken care of."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "My clothes?"
  • (Preston B. Whitmore) "Packed."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "My books?"
  • (Preston B. Whitmore) "In storage."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "My cat?"
  • (Michael J. Fox) "My gosh."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Holy SMOKES. I thought you said he only had guns."
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "What I said was that he's never surprised."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "How 'bout some slides? Th-the first slide is a depiction of a creature, a creature so frightening that sailors were said to be driven mad by the mere sight of it."
  • (Florence Stanley) "Hubba, hubba."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Uh, sorry, that's -- wrong."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Alright, Milo, this is it. Any last words? Yeah, I really wish I had a better idea than this."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Of course, it's been my experience, when you hit bottom, the only place left to go is up."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Who told you that?"
  • (Dr. Sweet) "A fellow by the name of Thaddeus Thatch."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "I -- travel -- friend."
  • (Princess Kida) "You -- travel, you are a friendly traveler."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Ita, sum amice viator."
  • (Princess Kida) "Dices linguam Romae."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Parlez-vous francais?"
  • (Princess Kida) "Oui, monsieur."
  • (Mole) "They speak my language. Pardon, mademoiselle, ah, voulez-vous --"
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Ooh, I like her."
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "Hmm. 'Bout time someone hit him. I'm just sorry it wasn't me."
  • (Unnamed) "Buenos dias. Ciao. Guten tag. Konnichiwa. Namaste. Ni hao."
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "How do they know all these languages?"
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Their language must be based on a root dialect. It's just like the Tower of Babel."
  • (Commander Rourke) "Well, maybe English is in there somewhere. We are explorers from the surface world. We come in peace."
  • (Princess Kida) "Welcome to the city of Atlantis."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "So, I guess this is how it ends, huh? Fine, you win. You're wiping out an entire civilization, but, hey, you'll be rich. Congratulations, Audrey. Guess you and your dad'll be able to open that second garage after all. And, Vinny, you-you can start a whole chain of flower shops. I'm sure your family's gonna be very proud. But that's what it's all about, right? Money."
  • (Commander Rourke) "Get off your soapbox, Thatch. You've read Darwin. It's called natural selection. We're just helping it along."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Say, Audrey. No-no offense, but how did a teenager become the chief mechanic of a multi-million dollar expedition?"
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "I took this job when my dad retired. But, the funny thing was, he always wanted sons, right? One to run his machine shop, another to be middleweight boxing champion. But, he got my sister and me, instead."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "So, what -- what happened to your sister?"
  • (Jacqueline Obradors) "She's 24 and 0, with a shot at the title next month."
  • (Preston B. Whitmore) "Atlantis is waiting"
  • (Preston B. Whitmore) "What do you say?"
  • (Michael J. Fox) "I'M Your Man Mr Whitmore."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "You will not regret this why I'm so excited I can't even hold it in."
  • (Commander Rourke) "So we find this masterpiece. Then what?"
  • (Mole) "When do we dig?"
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Actually, we don't have to dig. You see, according to the journal, the path to Atlantis will take us down a tunnel at the bottom of the ocean and will come up a curve into an air pocket, right here, where we'll find the remnants of an ancient highway that will lead us to Atlantis. Kind of like the grease trap in your sink."
  • (Helga) "Cartographer, linguist, plumber. Hard to believe he's still single."
  • (Mole) "You said there would be digging."
  • (Helga) "Go away, Mole."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "What's Mole's story?"
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Trust me on this one. You don't wanna know. Audrey, don't tell him. You shouldn't have told me, but you did. And now I'm tellin' you --"
  • (Dr. Sweet) "You don't wanna know."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "I'm gonna need you to fill these up."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "With what?"
  • (Dr. Sweet) "What, something wrong with your neck?"
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Oh, yeah. I must've hurt it when --"
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Aah. Ow."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Better?"
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Yeah. Hey, how did you learn to do that?"
  • (Dr. Sweet) "An Arapaho medicine man."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Get outta here."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Born and raised with 'em. My father was an army medic. He settled down in the Kansas Territory after he met my mother."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "No kidding."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Nope. I got a sheepskin from Howard U., and a bearskin from old Iron Cloud. Halfway through medical school, I was drafted. One day I'm studying gross anatomy in the classroom, the next I'm sewing up rough riders on San Juan Hill."
  • (Mole) "You have disturbed the dirt."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Uh, pardon me?"
  • (Mole) "You have disturbed the dirt. Dirt from around the globe spanning the centuries."
  • (Mole) "What have you done? England must never merge with France."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "What's it doing in my bed?"
  • (Mole) "You ask too many questions. Who are you? Who sent you? Speak up."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Me? I'm, uh --"
  • (Mole) "Bah. I will know soon enough."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Hey, hey, hey. Let go."
  • (Mole) "Do not be such a crybaby. Hold still."
  • (Mole) "Aha. There you are. Now tell me your story, my little friend."
  • (Mole) "Parchment fiber from the Nile Delta circa 500 B.C., lead pencil No. 2, paint flecks of a type used in government buildings, you have a cat, short hair Persian, two years old, third in a liter of seven. These are all the microscopic fingerprints of the mapmaker."
  • (Mole) "And linguist."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Excuse me, you dropped your dy-dy-dy-dynamite."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "What else have you, uh, got in there?"
  • (Don Novello) "Oh, er -- gunpowder, nitroglycerin, notepads, fuses, wicks, glue, and -- paper clips, big ones. You know, just, uh, office supplies."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Forget your jammies, Mrs. Packard?"
  • (Florence Stanley) "I sleep in the nude."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "You're gonna want a pair of these. She sleepwalks."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "You don't know what you're tampering with, Rourke."
  • (Commander Rourke) "What's to know? It's big, it's shiny, it's gonna make us all rich."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "You think it's some kind of diamond. I thought it was some kind of a battery. But we're both wrong. It's their life force. That crystal is the only thing keeping these people alive. You take that away, and they'll die."
  • (Commander Rourke) "Well, that changes things. Helga, what do you think?"
  • (Helga) "Knowing that, I'd double the price."
  • (Commander Rourke) "I was thinking triple."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Oh, my decision? Well, I-I think we've seen how effective my decisions have been. Let's re-cap. I lead a band of plundering vandals to the greatest archaeological find in recorded history, thus enabling the kidnap and/or murder of the royal family, not to mention personally delivering the most powerful force known to man into the hands of a mercenary nutcase who's probably gonna sell it to the Kaiser. Have I left anything out?"
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Well, you did set the camp on fire and drop us down that big hole."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Thank you. Thank you very much."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "I'm home. Fluffy? Here, kitty."
  • (Helga) "Milo James Thatch?"
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Who, who are you? H-How did you get in here?"
  • (Helga) "I came down the chimney, ho ho ho."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Milo Thatch. You're my three o'clock. Well, no time like the present."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Oh boy."
  • (Dr. Sweet) "Nice, isn't it? The catalog says that this little beauty can saw through a femur in twenty-eight seconds. I'm bettin' I can cut that time in half."
  • (Princess Kida) "You do swim, do you not?"
  • (Michael J. Fox) "Oh, I swim pretty girl -- Pr-Pretty good, pretty good. Sw -- Good. Swim good. Pretty good. I swim pretty good."
  • (Michael J. Fox) "It's only a grease trap, it's just like a sink; it's only a grease trap, it's just like a sink."

Florence Stanley as Wilhelmina

  • (Mole) "The magma has solidified in the bowels of the volcano, effectively blocking the exit."
  • (Florence Stanley) "I got the same problem with sauerkraut."
  • (Florence Stanley) "Attention. Tonight's supper will be baked beans. Musical program to follow. Who wrote this?"
  • (Commander Rourke) "What is it? A pod of whales?"
  • (Florence Stanley) "Uh-uh. Bigger."
  • (Helga) "It sounds metallic. Could be an echo off one of the rocks."
  • (Florence Stanley) "Do you wanna do my job? Be my guest."
  • (Florence Stanley) "To whoever took the "L" from the "Motor Pool" sign, ha-ha, we are all very amused."
  • (Florence Stanley) "We're all gonna die."

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