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Auntie Mame (film) Quotes

Auntie Mame (film) is a TV program that appeared on TV in 1970 . Auntie Mame ended in 1970.

It features Morton DaCosta as producer, Bronislau Kaper in charge of musical score, and Harry Stradling as head of cinematography.

Auntie Mame (film) is distributed by Warner Bros..

The cast includes: Rosalind Russell as Mame Dennis, Peggy Cass as Agnes Gooch, Roger Smith as Patrick Dennis, Coral Browne as Vera Charles, Joanna Barnes as Gloria Upson, Pippa Scott as Pegeen Ryan, Connie Gilchrist as Norah Muldoon, Brook Byron as Sally Cato, Fred Clark as Dwight Babcock, Carol Veazie as Mrs. Burnside, and Willard Waterman as Claude Upson.

Auntie Mame (film) Quotes

Rosalind Russell as Mame Dennis

  • (Rosalind Russell) "Spitting distance? How vivid."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Well, now, uh, read me all the words you don't understand."
  • (Roger Smith) "Libido, inferiority complex, stinko, blotto, free love, bathtub gin, monkey glands, Karl Marx -- is he one of the Marx Brothers?"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Exclusively what and restricted to whom?"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Child, how can you see with all that light?"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Please dear, your Auntie Mame's hung."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "You're er, you're at school dear?"
  • (Joanna Barnes) "I am an Upper Richman Girls School girl."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Now, how did you get that lovely tan, so early in the spring?"
  • (Joanna Barnes) "Oh, I played hooky for a couple of weeks. Mums and Dadums and I went down to our place in Fort Lauderdale. We have a place in Fort Lauderdale."
  • (Roger Smith) "I was out of my mind until she got back. I am insanely jealous of this kid. Sheer torture and I love it."
  • (Joanna Barnes) "Silly --"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Tell me dear, have you er, have you chosen your major yet?"
  • (Joanna Barnes) "Chosen my major?"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "What courses are you taking at college?"
  • (Joanna Barnes) "Ah, well, just a general sort of liberal arts things, you know, English lit and like that. Upper Richman's a top drawer. Really top drawer."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Widdicome, Gutterman, Applewhite, Bibberman and Black. You want to talk to Mr. Gutterman? One moment, sir. I'll connect you. Widdicome, Gutterman, Applewhite, Bibberman and Black. Oh, yes Mr. Bibberman. You'd like to talk with Mr. Applewhite? Oh, yes, sir, he's in. I'll connect you. Widdicome, Gutterman, Applewhite, Bib-bib-bib-blib-bibman and Black? Oh yes, long distance, how are you? Oh. Mr Widdecome? I have your San Francisco call for you. Yes, Mr. Bibberman? Oh. Did I connect you to Mr. Gutterman instead of Mr. Applewhite? I'm sorry Mr. Bibbicome, Bibbibibbib."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Oh Mr. Applewhite, what are you doing in that hole with Mr. Gutterman? Yes Mr. Widdicome? Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I'll try to reconnect you again with San Francisco. Let me see, Mr. Bibibib is in there talking to Mr. Bubbawhite. Where on earth is Mr. Applewhite? Oh, there you are Mr. Applewhite."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Mr. Widdicome, there's no such place as San Francisco. Please."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Mr. Bibibib? Mr. Widdicome?"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Such talented fingers -- what he did to my bust. That's a word for my head, you know."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Oh, Agnes, where is your spine? Here you've been taking my dictation for weeks and you don't get the message of my book. Live, that's the message."
  • (Peggy Cass) "Live?"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Yes. Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Darling. I'm your Auntie Mame."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "And what is this?"
  • (Peggy Cass) "I'm your sponge."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Oh, you know I really am fascinated by aviation. I never knew they did it all with rubber bands."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Don't forget the skates for the little nippers. Get 'em at Gimble's."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "-- to make him an Aryan -- from Darien?"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "What an honor it is to have you in our little home -- though I wonder if it does make the best first impression on a sensitive young mind to see you drinking during business hours."

Coral Browne as Vera Charles

  • (Coral Browne) "If you kept your hair natural like I do --"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "If I kept my hair natural like yours, I'd be bald."
  • (Coral Browne) "What the HELL have you got back there, reindeer?"

Roger Smith as Patrick Dennis

  • (Roger Smith) "Can I ask you just one question? How did you stay on that horse?"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "It was just like New Haven with the bracelets. I got stuck, but at the other end."
  • (Roger Smith) "-- Neurotic, heterosexual --"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Oh, my my my my, what an eager little mind."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "You won't need some of these words for months and months."
  • (Roger Smith) "Is the English lady sick, Auntie Mame?"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "She's not English, darling -- she's from Pittsburgh."
  • (Roger Smith) "She sounded English."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Well, when you're from Pittsburgh, you have to do something."

Peggy Cass as Agnes Gooch

  • (Peggy Cass) "I lived. I gotta find out what to do now."
  • (Peggy Cass) "Gooch."

Joanna Barnes as Gloria Upson

  • (Joanna Barnes) "Miss Charles, I've just got to tell you how I adored you in "Mary of Scotland.""
  • (Coral Browne) "Did you dear? That was Helen Hayes."
  • (Joanna Barnes) "Bunny Bixler and I were in the semi-finals; the very semi-finals, mind you; of the ping-pong tournament at the club and this ghastly thing happened. We were both playing way over our heads and the score was 29-28. And we had this really terrific volley and I stepped back to get this really terrific shot. And I stepped on the ping-pong ball. I just squashed it to bits. And then Bunny and I ran to the closet of the game room to get another ping-pong ball and the closet was locked. Imagine? We had to call the whole thing off. Well, it was ghastly. Well, it was just ghastly."
  • (Joanna Barnes) "And, of course, it's completely restricted."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "I'll get a blood test."
  • (Joanna Barnes) "Oh, my, what a stunning apartment."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Thank you."
  • (Joanna Barnes) "Books are awfully decorative, don't you think?"

Fred Clark as Dwight Babcock

  • (Fred Clark) "I dropped by the Bixby School. And what do I find? I find he isn't even registered there, he never has been. So I've been hunting through every low, crockpot school in this town, and I finally found him in the lowest of them all."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Mr. Page is a progressive educator --"
  • (Fred Clark) "There they were, a schoolroom full of them: boys, girls, teachers, romping around stark naked, bare as the day they were born."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "I assure you that the children under Mr. Page's care were engaged in normal, healthful, broadening pursuits."
  • (Fred Clark) "Broadening? You show them what you were doing when I broke into that place. Go ahead, show them."
  • (Roger Smith) "We just playing Fish Families."
  • (Fred Clark) "Fish Families."
  • (Roger Smith) "It's part of "constructive play"."
  • (Fred Clark) "Now, listen to this."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Show me now darling, show me."
  • (Roger Smith) "Well, we do it right after yogurt time. Mrs. Page and all the girls crouch down on the floor under the sun lamps. And they pretend to be lady fishes, depositing their eggs in the sand. Then Mr. Page and all the boys do what gentlemen fish do."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "What could be more wholesome or natural?"
  • (Fred Clark) "For nine years, Mame Dennis Burnside, I have done everything in my power to protect this boy from your idiotic, cockeyed nincompoopery."

Pippa Scott as Pegeen Ryan

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Brook Byron as Sally Cato

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Carol Veazie as Mrs. Burnside

  • (Carol Veazie) "'afternoon to y'all. Vultures."
  • (Brook Byron) "Now Mrs. Burnside, I hope you don't think of me as a vulture."
  • (Carol Veazie) "Oh, no, Sally Cato. You're not a vulture, you're just a dead pidgeon."

Connie Gilchrist as Norah Muldoon

  • (Connie Gilchrist) "It's the "First Lady of the American Thee-ayter" out cold in the guestroom. Ms. Charles don' live here. She does her drinkin' here and her passin' out here."

Willard Waterman as Claude Upson

  • (Willard Waterman) "I got this recipe from a bartender I met in Havana. You'll never guess the secret ingredient. I'll give you one hint: there's no sugar in a Claude Upson daiquiri."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "And yet it's so -- sweet."
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Whatever do you use?"
  • (Rosalind Russell) "Chocolate ice cream."

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