(Article is below...)

Baby Mama (film) Quotes

Baby Mama (film) is a television program that debuted in 1970 . Baby Mama completed its run in 1970.

It features Lorne Michaels as producer, Jeff Richmond in charge of musical score, and Daryn Okada as head of cinematography.

Baby Mama (film) is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Baby Mama (film) is 99 minutes long. Baby Mama (film) is distributed by Universal Studios.

The cast includes: Holland Taylor as Kate Holbrook, Amy Poehler as Angie Ostrowiski, Greg Kinnear as Rob, Sigourney Weaver as Chaffee Bicknell, Denis O'Hare as Dr. Manheim, Maura Tierney as Caroline, Dax Shepard as Carl, Will Forte as Scott, Siobhan Fallon Hogan as Birthing Teacher, Romany Malco as Oscar, James Rebhorn as Judge, Steve Martin as Barry, and John Hodgman as Fertility Specialist.

Baby Mama (film) Quotes

Amy Poehler as Angie Ostrowiski

  • (Amy Poehler) "Your stupid space car locked me in."
  • (Amy Poehler) "You know what we should do?"
  • (Holland Taylor) "What?"
  • (Holland Taylor) "I was gonna say leave a funny note."
  • (Amy Poehler) "You went out with him?"
  • (Holland Taylor) "I did."
  • (Amy Poehler) "Why?"
  • (Holland Taylor) "Oh, he's beautiful."
  • (Amy Poehler) "Where?"
  • (Amy Poehler) "There's something wrong with your toilet."
  • (Amy Poehler) "Stop framing your face."
  • (Holland Taylor) "I think it's good."
  • (Amy Poehler) "It's not."
  • (Amy Poehler) "It feels like I'm s***ting a knife."
  • (Amy Poehler) "You people and your space age cars."
  • (Amy Poehler) "Is that what you're wearing?"
  • (Holland Taylor) "We are going to a nightclub."
  • (Amy Poehler) "Can I just spray a little PAM down there right before the baby comes out?"
  • (Amy Poehler) "I want a common law divorce."

Dax Shepard as Carl

  • (Dax Shepard) "My first thought about Angie carrying someone else's baby? I thought -- My wife is gonna have sex with somebody else's husband to do this? --"
  • (Amy Poehler) "Out of the question --"
  • (Dax Shepard) "that's gonna cost extr; out of the question, right. Out of the question."
  • (Dax Shepard) "I want you back. I haven't had sex in 2 weeks."
  • (Amy Poehler) "I've been gone for a month."
  • (Dax Shepard) "I'm going to bang all your friends. Consider them banged."

Sigourney Weaver as Chaffee Bicknell

  • (Sigourney Weaver) "Yes, I'm expecting again."
  • (Amy Poehler) "Expecting what? A Social Security check?"
  • (Holland Taylor) "I know; it's gross."
  • (Sigourney Weaver) "Our surrogacy fee is $100,000."
  • (Holland Taylor) "It costs more to have someone born than to have someone killed."
  • (Sigourney Weaver) "It takes longer."

Will Forte as Scott

  • (Will Forte) "Oh, it's great. We just bought a house in Bucks county. I'm still doing stuff for Doctors Without Borders. Recently we took in some hurricane Katrina dogs. Oh, and I was in a bicycle accident that made my penis bigger."

Holland Taylor as Kate Holbrook

  • (Holland Taylor) "I'm sorry, I'm a little overly thorough. Some people would say that I am bossy and controlling."
  • (Greg Kinnear) "No, that's just prejudice. They call you bossy and controlling because you're a woman. But if you were a man doing the same stuff -- you'd just be a dick."
  • (Holland Taylor) "Have you done this before?"
  • (Amy Poehler) "No, but I know I'm good at getting pregnant."
  • (Holland Taylor) "Your eggs are like, from the 40's."
  • (Holland Taylor) "Did you just stick your gum under my coffee table?"
  • (Amy Poehler) "I don't know."
  • (Holland Taylor) "What do you mean, you don't know? You think you're at an Arby's right now?"
  • (Amy Poehler) "You know what? I wish I was at an Arby's 'cause there's better food and cooler people there."
  • (Holland Taylor) "Did you stick all this gum under here?"
  • (Amy Poehler) "I don't know. Maybe you stuck some of it under there."
  • (Holland Taylor) "Yeah, actually, you might be right. 'Cause sometimes, when I work a really long day, I like to come home and chew a huge wad of Bubblicious gum and stick it under my reclaimed barnwood coffee table."
  • (Amy Poehler) "Bitch, I don't know your life."
  • (Holland Taylor) "My avatar's dressed like a whore."
  • (Holland Taylor) "But that's impossible. The doctors said I had a one-in-a-million chance."
  • (Denis O'Hare) "Well, I'd start buying lottery tickets more often, if I were you."
  • (Holland Taylor) "I'm thirty-seven and I want a baby."
  • (Holland Taylor) "I overreacted earlier. I'm sorry --"
  • (Amy Poehler) "I'm sorry I farted into your purse --"
  • (Holland Taylor) "So -- How long have you two been together?"
  • (Amy Poehler) "We met the summer after I discontinued high school, and we've been together ever since."
  • (Amy Poehler) "He never officially asked me to be his wife but he never asked me to not be his wife either, so things are going pretty good."
  • (Holland Taylor) "Your water broke."
  • (Holland Taylor) "No, your water. Come on, I'll drive you to the hospital."
  • (Amy Poehler) "Should we clean that up?"
  • (Holland Taylor) "She's crazy. It's like living with a child."

Romany Malco as Oscar

  • (Romany Malco) "If you listen to DMX, the baby comes out goin 'Ennngghhh."
  • (Romany Malco) "Here come, yo baby mama. Riding, a Suzuki."

John Hodgman as Fertility Specialist

  • (John Hodgman) "Well -- I just don't like your uterus."
  • (John Hodgman) "Don't get me wrong, your eggs are in great shape, but you have a T-shaped uterus. That combined with your advanced maternal age, it's preventing proper implantation."
  • (Holland Taylor) "Why do I have this T-shaped uterus?"
  • (John Hodgman) "Well, probably has something to do with medication that was given to your mother when she was pregnant with you. We used lot of drugs back in the '70s which we now know can cause infertility."
  • (Holland Taylor) "Infertility?"
  • (John Hodgman) "Yeah. I would say that your chances of conceiving are very low."
  • (Holland Taylor) "How low?"
  • (John Hodgman) "Well, I don't want to assign a number to it."
  • (Holland Taylor) "What would you assign it? A color, a nickname, a locker?"
  • (John Hodgman) "Okay. One in, in a million. I just don't like --"
  • (Holland Taylor) "Don't say that again."

Maura Tierney as Caroline

  • (Maura Tierney) "Is this chocolate or poop? Is this chocolate or poop?"
  • (Maura Tierney) "It's chocolate."
  • (Holland Taylor) "What if that had been poop?"

Steve Martin as Barry

  • (Steve Martin) "Congratulations, Kate. I want to reward you with five minutes of uninterrupted eye contact."

James Rebhorn as Judge

  • (James Rebhorn) "Excuse me Miss, but would you please sit down."
  • (Amy Poehler) "No. Freedom of speech, it's in the thing."

Greg Kinnear as Rob

  • (Greg Kinnear) "Do you want to come back to my --"
  • (Holland Taylor) "Yes. Absolutely."
  • (Greg Kinnear) "Wow. Okay. Just to be clear, I was going to say my place --"
  • (Holland Taylor) "Uh-huh. I'm 37. I know how this works."

Siobhan Fallon Hogan as Birthing Teacher

Add or Update Quotes

If you have a quote to add or change and want to let us know, please fill in the form below. Include the time in the film/video if possible so we can find it.




Additional Film and TV Quotes

Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins Quotes | Doraemon: Nobita and the Birth of Japan Quotes | Beat (2000 film) Quotes | Adventures of Sir Galahad Quotes | Bye Bye Africa Quotes | The Red Kebaya Quotes | Flipping Out Quotes | Swing Vote (2008 film) Quotes | Amarte es mi Pecado Quotes | Lars and the Real Girl Quotes | Susan's Plan Quotes | Walking Tall: Lone Justice Quotes | City of Gold (1957 film) Quotes | The Comrades of Summer Quotes | Pehchaan: The Face of Truth Quotes | The Land Before Time XIII: The Wisdom of Friends Quotes | Tis Agapis Maheria Quotes | Yiddle with Her Fiddle Quotes | Bangers and Mash (TV series) Quotes | Things To Try Before You Die Quotes | Valdez Is Coming Quotes | Ten Tall Men Quotes | The Kentuckian Quotes | Thor (film) Quotes | Dodger, Bonzo and the Rest Quotes |