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Barely Legal (Family Guy) Quotes

Barely Legal (Family Guy) is a TV program that first aired in 1970 . Barely Legal ended its run in 1970.

Barely Legal (Family Guy) Quotes

  • (Peter Griffin) "Come on, we'll be great cops. Besides, it's bound to go better than my deep-sea training."
  • (Peter Griffin) "Well, we got a long time in this decompression chamber. Uh, you guys mind if I turn on the radio?"
  • (Unnamed) "Peter, don't."
  • (Unnamed) "Oh, nice going, jackass."
  • (Unnamed) "Oh, look what you did."
  • (Unnamed) "Aw, come on, you jerk."
  • (Peter Griffin) "Hey, hey. Excuse the hell out of me for trying to brighten your day with music, all right?"
  • (Unnamed) "You idiot, use your brain."
  • (Peter Griffin) "You're an idiot."
  • (Peter Griffin) "Hey. Whoa, whoa. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Oh, man, we're going to need some butter or something."
  • (Stewie Griffin) "ooh, you've got some pie. Can I have a piece?"
  • (Brian Griffin) "Uh, ok"
  • (Stewie Griffin) "Hey, pass over some of that Cool wHip"
  • (Brian Griffin) "What?"
  • (Stewie Griffin) "Well, you put Cool wHip on pie."
  • (Brian Griffin) "It's Cool Whip"
  • (Stewie Griffin) "That's what I said, Cool wHip"
  • (Brian Griffin) "Cool Whip"
  • (Stewie Griffin) "Cool wHip"
  • (Brian Griffin) "Cool Whip"
  • (Stewie Griffin) "Cool wHip"
  • (Brian Griffin) "Why are you putting so much emphasis on the H?"
  • (Stewie Griffin) "What are you talking about? I'm just saying Cool wHip"
  • (Brian Griffin) "Say whip"
  • (Stewie Griffin) "Whip"
  • (Brian Griffin) "Now say Cool Whip"
  • (Stewie Griffin) "Cool wHip"
  • (Brian Griffin) "Cool Whip."
  • (Stewie Griffin) "Cool wHip"
  • (Brian Griffin) "Cool Whip."
  • (Stewie Griffin) "Cool wHip"
  • (Brian Griffin) "You're eating HAIR."
  • (Meg Griffin) "Hi, honey."
  • (Brian Griffin) "What?"
  • (Meg Griffin) "I was thinking about our kiss last night. I never knew how flat and wide your tongue is."
  • (Brian Griffin) "Yeahhh"
  • (Meg Griffin) "You know, I've thought about how you stood up for me at the dance, and all the nice things you said. We should totally be boyfriend and girlfriend."
  • (Brian Griffin) "Well Meg, you know, it's strange -- I -- I think I may be gay. um, I saw this penis on the internet today, and I thought to myself, "Well that's just fine.""
  • (Meg Griffin) "I'm going to the mall the later, maybe you can come and help me pick out some underwear."
  • (Brian Griffin) "Uhh, I don't think that's going to be a possibility, uhhh, I have plans, with Chris. Chris and I have plans this afternoon."
  • (Chris Griffin) "We do?"
  • (Brian Griffin) "Yeah, yeah. We're doing that thing, we're doing what you usually do on a Thursday afternoon."
  • (Chris Griffin) "Masturbate?"
  • (Brian Griffin) "That's it, that's what we're going to do together."
  • (Chris Griffin) "Well, maybe back to back, but I gotta tell you, I'm not 100% on this."
  • (Peter Griffin) "Holy crap. What the hell."
  • (Joe Swanson) "Brian, she's a teenager."
  • (Peter Griffin) "Yeah Brian, your doing the same thing that Mia Farrow did to that Chinaman that Woody Allen brought home from the circus."
  • (Lois Griffin) "Peter, hold on to that thought, because I'm gonna explain to you when we get home all the things that are wrong with that statement"
  • (Cleveland Brown) "I gotta stop taking my baths during peter's shenanigans."
  • (Unnamed) "Something Something Dark Side. Something Something Complete."
  • (Brian Griffin) "Don't worry, that was the booze, not you."
  • (Brian Griffin) "Are you gonna eat that?"
  • (Lois Griffin) "Ugh. This is even worse than when you ate that bubblegum out of the garbage."
  • (Lois Griffin) "Brian, did you get into the garbage last night?"
  • (Brian Griffin) "Uh -- no, why?"
  • (Lois Griffin) "Don't lie to me, Brian."
  • (Brian Griffin) "I'm not lying."
  • (Brian Griffin) "Connie, I think I have a theory about why you're such a bitch. You see, Connie, you're popular because you developed early and started putting out when you were 12, but now, you can't stand to look at yourself in the mirror because all you see is a whore. So you pick on Meg to avoid the inevitable realization that once your body is used up by age 19, you're gonna be a worn-out, chalky skin, burlap sack that even your stepdad won't want. How's that? Am I in the ball park?"
  • (Meg Griffin) "Just relax, Brian. We're going to be here for a wHile."
  • (Brian Griffin) "Wait, what did you say?"
  • (Meg Griffin) "I said, "We're going to be here for a wHile.""
  • (Brian Griffin) "A while."
  • (Meg Griffin) "A wHile."
  • (Brian Griffin) "A while."
  • (Meg Griffin) "A wHile."
  • (Brian Griffin) "A while."
  • (Meg Griffin) "Brian, you're acting whierd."
  • (Brian Griffin) "Oh, come on. That one doesn't even have an H in it."
  • (Connie D'Amico) "You know, Meg, there's no dogs allowed here so you're gonna have to leave, but Brian can stay."
  • (Brian Griffin) "You know, Connie, I think I have a theory about why you're such a bitch."
  • (Connie D'Amico) "Excuse me?"
  • (Meg Griffin) "Brian let's just go."
  • (Brian Griffin) "No, no, no hang on, hang on. You see Connie, you're popular because you developed early and started giving handjobs when you were twelve and now you can't stand to look at yourself in the mirror because all you see is a whore. So you pick on Meg to avoid the inevitable realization that once your body is used up by age 19 you're going to be a worn out, chalky skinned burlap sack that even your step dad won't want. How's that? Am I in the ballpark?"

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