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Burn After Reading Quotes

Burn After Reading is a TV show that was first aired in 1970 . Burn After Reading completed its run in 1970.

It features Joel Coen, and Ethan Coen as producer, Carter Burwell in charge of musical score, and Emmanuel Lubezki as head of cinematography.

Burn After Reading is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Burn After Reading is 96 minutes long. Burn After Reading is distributed by Focus Features.

The cast includes: David Rasche as CIA Officer, John Malkovich as Osbourne Cox, Brad Pitt as Chad Feldheimer, George Clooney as Harry Pfarrer, Aleksander Krupa as Krapotkin, Frances McDormand as Linda Litzke, Tilda Swinton as Katie Cox, and David Rasche as Palmer DeBakey Smith, CIA Officer.

Burn After Reading Quotes

Aleksander Krupa as Krapotkin

  • (Aleksander Krupa) "This is Mr Krapotkin from the Russian embassy."
  • (Frances McDormand) "Mr Crapkin -- Is this a secure line?"
  • (Aleksander Krupa) "Are you joking?"
  • (Aleksander Krupa) "PC or MAC?"

Frances McDormand as Linda Litzke

  • (Frances McDormand) "You should put up a note in the ladies locker room."
  • (Brad Pitt) "Put up a note? "Highly classified s*** found: Signal intelligence s***, CIA s***?" Hello, anybody lose their secret CIA s***? I don't think so."
  • (Ted Treffon) "Linda, what do you really know about this guy?"
  • (Frances McDormand) "I told you, he's in the Treasury Department."
  • (Ted Treffon) "But eh, no, I mean, you know -- he could be one of these guys that cruises the Internet."
  • (Frances McDormand) "Yeah, so am I --"
  • (Frances McDormand) "I'm really looking for a guy with a sense of humor."
  • (Brad Pitt) "That guy, wait, that guy wasn't bad."
  • (Frances McDormand) "Him?"
  • (Brad Pitt) "No before."
  • (Frances McDormand) "Him?"
  • (Brad Pitt) "Umm, he might not be a loser --"
  • (Frances McDormand) "How can you tell?"
  • (Brad Pitt) "That's a Brioni suit."
  • (Frances McDormand) "Yeah?"
  • (Brad Pitt) "s*** yeah."
  • (Frances McDormand) "Does he look like he would have a sense of humor?"
  • (Brad Pitt) "Looks like his optometrist has a sense of humor."
  • (Frances McDormand) "The fish has bitten."

John Malkovich as Osbourne Cox

  • (John Malkovich) "I have a drinking problem? f*** you, Peck, you're a Mormon. Compared to you we ALL have a drinking problem."
  • (John Malkovich) "Lactose Reflux? Do you mean Lactose intolerance or Acid Reflux? They're two different things."
  • (George Clooney) "This is cheese, so -- Lactose intolerance."
  • (John Malkovich) "So you misspoke."
  • (John Malkovich) "We were young and committed and there was nothing we could not do. We thought of the Agency less -- Um -- The principles of George Kennan, a personal hero of mine, like the fabled Murrow's Boys, at a time of --"
  • (John Malkovich) "Give me the CD."
  • (Brad Pitt) "As soon as you give us the money, dickwad."
  • (John Malkovich) "Some clown, or two clowns, have gotten a hold of my memoirs."
  • (Tilda Swinton) "Your what?"
  • (John Malkovich) "Stolen it, or I don't know --"
  • (Tilda Swinton) "Your what?"
  • (John Malkovich) "My memoirs, the book I'm writing."
  • (Tilda Swinton) "Well why in God's name would anyone think that's worth anything?"
  • (John Malkovich) "And you're my wife's lover?"
  • (Ted Treffon) "No."
  • (John Malkovich) "Then what are you doing here?"
  • (John Malkovich) "I know you. You're the guy from the gym."
  • (Ted Treffon) "I'm not here representing HardBodies."
  • (John Malkovich) "Oh, yes. I know very well what you represent."
  • (John Malkovich) "You represent the idiocy of today."
  • (Ted Treffon) "No, I don't represent that either."
  • (John Malkovich) "Yeah. You're the guy at the gym when I asked about that moronic woman."
  • (Ted Treffon) "She's not a moron."
  • (John Malkovich) "You're in league with that moronic woman. You are part of a league of morons."
  • (Ted Treffon) "No. No."
  • (John Malkovich) "Oh, yes. You see, you're one of the morons I've been fighting my whole life. My whole f***ing life. But guess what -- Today, I win."
  • (John Malkovich) "No. No, I'm sorry, I don't know the number to, uh, my savings account because believe it or not I don't spend my entire day sitting around trying to memorize the f***ing numbers to my f***ing bank accounts. Moron."

George Clooney as Harry Pfarrer

  • (George Clooney) "Go around the corner, we'll do it in the back."
  • (Tilda Swinton) "You're so coarse."
  • (George Clooney) "Back of the car -- not the -- rear-entry situation --"
  • (George Clooney) "Twenty years of Marshal Service, I never discharged my gun."
  • (John Malkovich) "That sounds like something you ought to be telling your psychologist."
  • (George Clooney) "Maybe I can get a run in."
  • (George Clooney) "Oh my f*** -- I just killed a f***ing spook."
  • (George Clooney) "What is this? Pine?"
  • (George Clooney) "Who the f*** do you work for, you f***er?"
  • (George Clooney) "Well, hello."
  • (George Clooney) "Ya wanna come downstairs? Ya like surprises?"
  • (Frances McDormand) "Well, I'm always open to new experiences."
  • (George Clooney) "Yeah, I tell ya. I saw an ad for this in a gentlemen's magazine. Twelve hundred bucks. I'm lookin' at this thing and I think, 'You gotta be kiddin' me.' I'm a hobbyist. Thing's basically nothing but speed rails. I figure I'd go down to Home Depot and whip this up myself for -- a hundred bucks."
  • (Frances McDormand) "What is it?"
  • (George Clooney) "What is it?"
  • (George Clooney) "You sit down there, make yourself comfortable, put your feet in the stirrups, and --"
  • (Frances McDormand) "Oh my God."
  • (Frances McDormand) "That's fantastic."
  • (George Clooney) "It's something, isn't it? Hundred bucks, all in; not counting my labor, and the -- cost of the dildo. Those things aren't cheap. See, I'd like to --"
  • (George Clooney) "-- I'm not set up to mold hard rubber."
  • (George Clooney) "You work for Tuchman Marsh?"
  • (Tuchman Marsh Man) "Yes."
  • (George Clooney) "Is that a law firm?"
  • (Tuchman Marsh Man) "No, a rock band; yes it's a law firm --"

Brad Pitt as Chad Feldheimer

  • (Brad Pitt) "Osbourne Cox? I thought you might be worried -- about the security -- of your s***."
  • (Brad Pitt) "Manolo, you DIDN'T find this."
  • (Manolo) "I found it on the floor there."
  • (Brad Pitt) "Yeah, I know. But --"
  • (Manolo) "Right there on the floor there. Just lying there."
  • (Brad Pitt) "And"
  • (Brad Pitt) "I got his number. I got his number."
  • (Brad Pitt) "Osbourne Cox?"
  • (John Malkovich) "Yes, this is Osbourne Cox, who the f*** are YOU?"
  • (Brad Pitt) "Oh, my God."
  • (Brad Pitt) "Uh, O-Osbourne Cox?"
  • (John Malkovich) "Yes. Yes, it's; Hello. It's Osbourne Cox. Who the f*** are you? What documents are you talking about?"
  • (Brad Pitt) "Appearances can be -- deceptive."

David Rasche as Palmer DeBakey Smith, CIA Officer

  • (David Rasche) "Ozzie, come on in."
  • (John Malkovich) "Palmer, what's up?"
  • (David Rasche) "Uh, you know, uh, Peck and Olson?"
  • (John Malkovich) "Peck yes, hi ya --"
  • (David Rasche) "Olson by reputation."
  • (John Malkovich) "I'm Osbourne Cox."
  • (Olson) "Yeah, I, mmm --"
  • (John Malkovich) "Aren't you with --"
  • (David Rasche) "Ya, that's right. Have a seat."
  • (David Rasche) "Look Oz, look, there's no easy way to say this: We're taking you off the Balkans Desk."
  • (David Rasche) "We'll -- interface with the FBI on this dead body."
  • (CIA Superior) "No, no. God no. We don't need those idiots f***ing everything up. Burn the body. Get rid of it."
  • (David Rasche) "OK."
  • (CIA Superior) "The Russians?"
  • (David Rasche) "Mmm-hmm."
  • (CIA Superior) "The Russians?"
  • (David Rasche) "Mmm-hmm, Russian Embassy."
  • (CIA Superior) "Are you sure?"
  • (David Rasche) "Hey, the guy was not hard to follow, as you know."
  • (CIA Superior) "Why the f*** would they go to the Russians? Why the f***?"
  • (CIA Superior) "What did we learn, Palmer?"
  • (David Rasche) "I don't know, sir."
  • (CIA Superior) "I don't f***in' know either. I guess we learned not to do it again."
  • (David Rasche) "Yes, sir."
  • (CIA Superior) "I'm f***ed if I know what we did."
  • (David Rasche) "Yes, sir, it's, uh, hard to say"
  • (CIA Superior) "Jesus f***ing Christ."
  • (CIA Superior) "For now just keep an eye on everyone. See what they do."
  • (David Rasche) "Yes, sir. And we'll interface with the FBI on this dead body."
  • (CIA Superior) "No, no. God no. We don't want those idiots bumbling around in this. Burn the body. Get rid of it. And, uh, keep an eye on everyone. See what they do. Report back to me when, uh, I don't know, when it makes sense."

Tilda Swinton as Katie Cox

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