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Capricorn One Quotes

Capricorn One is a TV program that debuted in 1970 . Capricorn One ended its run in 1970.

It features Paul N. Lazarus III as producer, Jerry Goldsmith in charge of musical score, and Bill Butler (cinematographer) as head of cinematography.

Capricorn One is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Capricorn One is 124 minutes long. Capricorn One is distributed by Warner Bros..

The cast includes: Elliott Gould as Robert Caulfield, Karen Black as Judy Drinkwater, Hal Holbrook as Dr. James Kelloway, James Brolin as Charles Brubaker, David Doyle as Walter Loughlin, Telly Savalas as Albain, Brenda Vaccaro as Kay Brubaker, and David Huddleston as Congressman Hollis Peaker.

Capricorn One Quotes

David Huddleston as Congressman Hollis Peaker

  • (David Huddleston) "It's that big, tall, white thing over there. You can't miss it."

Telly Savalas as Albain

  • (Telly Savalas) "Perverts."
  • (Telly Savalas) "Remember I get half."
  • (Telly Savalas) "Keep your god damn head down."
  • (Telly Savalas) "Now what the hell is your friend doing here?"
  • (Elliott Gould) "He's lost."
  • (Telly Savalas) "He robbed a bank or something?"
  • (Elliott Gould) "No."
  • (Telly Savalas) "Well, I get a third."
  • (Elliott Gould) "What?"
  • (Telly Savalas) "We find him, I get a third of the loot. Now keep your god**** head down."

Elliott Gould as Robert Caulfield

  • (Elliott Gould) "Somebody took a shot at me."
  • (David Doyle) "When?"
  • (Elliott Gould) "Yesterday."
  • (David Doyle) "Thank God I've got an alibi."
  • (Elliott Gould) "You wouldn't know sincerity if it ran over you."
  • (Karen Black) "Not if you were driving it."
  • (Elliott Gould) "You in charge here?"
  • (Telly Savalas) "See that sign there?"
  • (Elliott Gould) "Yes."
  • (Telly Savalas) "Well, read it."
  • (Elliott Gould) "I did."
  • (Telly Savalas) "Out loud."
  • (Elliott Gould) "A&A Crop Dusting Service."
  • (Telly Savalas) "You wanna know who I am?"
  • (Elliott Gould) "I bet you're one of the A's."
  • (Telly Savalas) "But which one? I bet you can't answer that question, smartass."
  • (Elliott Gould) "The first one."
  • (Telly Savalas) "Wrong."
  • (Elliott Gould) "Can I have one more guess?"
  • (Telly Savalas) "You got it."
  • (Elliott Gould) "The second one."
  • (Telly Savalas) "Wrong. I'm both of them. My name is AlBaine. Now, I got a son. You know, the other A was for him but he don't like to fly. He became a lawyer. I think he's a pervert so I took the A away from him. You want to speak to someone in charge, you're speaking to the both of them."
  • (Elliott Gould) "My name is Caulfield."
  • (Telly Savalas) "Hey, I can't help that."

David Doyle as Walter Loughlin

  • (David Doyle) "You're not crazy, I'm crazy. I'm crazy for listening and I'm crazy for saying what I'm about to say. I'll give you twenty four hours to come up with something. Not forty eight. I saw the movie too, it was twenty four."
  • (David Doyle) "Listen to me and listen good. I don't like you, Caulfield. You're ambitious. You think the way to get ahead is to come up with the scoop of the century. Woodward and Bernstein were good reporters, that's how they did it. Not by telling me they've located Patty Hearst three times like you did or that brilliant piece of investigative journalism you pulled off by finding an eye witness to the second gunman in the Kennedy assassination. The small fact that the man had been in a mental institution at the time never deterred you, not 'scoop' Caulfield. Now most reporters are like me. They are plodders. They spend a lot of their time checking little things -- like facts. They cover mundane stories like wars and trials and hearings. You never seem to have enough time in your busy schedule to stoop so low as to cover a story. You occupy your time with tips from people who never existed. Driving your car into water and claiming it wasn't your fault. Getting shot at by unseen gunmen. Now I really hate to interrupt your meteoric career with something so plebeian as a legitimate story. However, a train load of propane gas had the bad taste to derail near Galveston and there's a whole town that just might blow up. So it would be just really peachy of you if you would join your film crew that's waiting for you on the plane at this very moment while we speak."
  • (Elliott Gould) "That was some speech."
  • (David Doyle) "I thought so."
  • (David Doyle) "You're fired. Oh, I love how that sounds. I love that so much I'm going to say it again. You're fired. You're through. Oh, I love it."

James Brolin as Charles Brubaker

  • (James Brolin) "Oh, Christ. Fuel. There's no god**** fuel."
  • (Unnamed) "I told you never to take a trip without checking the tank."
  • (James Brolin) "John, you take the flint. Peter and I will split up the matches. Anybody want the gun?"
  • (Unnamed) "I'd shoot my foot."
  • (Unnamed) "I'd shoot his foot."
  • (James Brolin) "We -- are dead. We are dead."
  • (Unnamed) "s***. I was such a terrific guy."
  • (James Brolin) "This is really wonderful. If we go along with you and lie our asses off, the world of truth and ideals is, er, protected. But if we don't want to take part in some giant rip-off of yours then somehow or other we're managing to ruin the country. You're pretty good, Jim. I'll give you that."

Hal Holbrook as Dr. James Kelloway

  • (Unnamed) "Hey, Uncle Jim?"
  • (Hal Holbrook) "Yeah?"
  • (Unnamed) "My dad went to Mars."
  • (Hal Holbrook) "Yes. Yes, he did."
  • (Hal Holbrook) "You think it's all a couple of looney scientists, it's not. It's bigger. There are people out there, forces out there, who have a lot to lose. They're grown ups. It's gotten too big, it's in the hands of grown ups."
  • (Hal Holbrook) "Okay, here it is. I have to start by saying that if there was any other way, if there was even a slight chance of another alternative, I would give anything not to be here with you now. Anything. Bru, how long have we known each other? Sixteen years. That's how long. Sixteen years. You should have seen yourself then. You looked like you just walked out of a Wheaties box. And me, all sweaty palm and deadly serious. I told everybody about this dream I had of conquering the new frontier, and they all looked at me like I was nuts. You looked at me and said, "yes." I remember when you told me Kay was pregnant. We went out and got crocked. I remember when Charles was born. We went out and got crocked again. The two of us. Captain Terrific and the Mad Doctor, talking about reaching the stars, and the bartender telling us maybe we'd had enough. Sixteen years. And then Armstrong stepped out on the Moon, and we cried. We were so proud. Willis, you and Walker, you came in about then. Both bright and talented wise-asses, looked at me in my wash-and-wear shirt carrying on this hot love affair with my slide-rule, and even you were caught up in what we'd done. I remember when Glenn made his first orbit in Mercury, they put up television sets in Grand Central Station, and tens of thousands of people missed their trains to watch. You know, when Apollo 17 landed on the Moon, people were calling up the networks and bitching because reruns of I Love Lucy were cancelled. Reruns, for Christ's sake. I could understand if it was the new Lucy show. After all, what's a walk on the Moon? But reruns. Oh, geez. And then suddenly everybody started talking about how much everything cost. Was it really worth twenty billion to go to another planet? What about cancer? What about the slums? How much does it cost? How much does any dream cost, for Christ's sake? Since when is there an accountant for ideas? You know who was at the launch today? Not the President. The Vice-President, that's who. The Vice-President and his plump wife. The President was busy. He's not busy. He's just a little bit scared. He sat there two months ago and put his feet up on Woodrow Wilson's desk, and he said, "Jim. Make it good. Congress is on my back. They're looking for a reason to cancel the program. We can't afford another screw-up. Make it good. You have my every good wish." His every good wish. I got his sanctimonious Vice President. That's what I got. So, there we are. After all those hopes and ll that dreaming, he sits there, with those flags behind his chair, and tells me we can't afford a screw-up. And guess what. We had a screw-up. A first-class, bona-fide, made-in-America screw-up. The good people from Con-Amalgamate delivered a life-support system cheap enough so they could make a profit on the deal. Works out fine for everybody. Con-Amalgamate makes money. We have our life-support system. Everything's peachy. Except they made a little bit too much profit. We found out two months ago it won't work. You guys would all be dead in three weeks. It's as simple as that. So, all I have to do is report that and scrub the mission. Congress has its excuse, the President still has his desk, and we have no more program. What's sixteen years? Your actual drop in the bucket. All right. That's the end of the speech. Now, we're getting to what they call the moment of truth. Come with me. I want to show you something."

Karen Black as Judy Drinkwater

  • (Karen Black) "I'll fix you some coffee, then you can jump me."
  • (Elliott Gould) "There's no other one besides White Bluff?"
  • (Karen Black) "No, except one abandoned base they used for training during World War Two. Jackson. There's nothing there now. Don't you want to jump me?"
  • (Elliott Gould) "Of course I do. Where's Jackson?"
  • (Karen Black) "About three hundred miles directly west. I think I'm going to get angry with you."
  • (Elliott Gould) "Do you have any money on you?"
  • (Karen Black) "You want me to pay you?"
  • (Elliott Gould) "How much?"
  • (Karen Black) "About a hundred. Why don't I just leave it on the dresser in the morning?"
  • (Elliott Gould) "Give it to me now."
  • (Karen Black) "In advance? That's the height of conceit."
  • (Elliott Gould) "Please, and your car keys."

Brenda Vaccaro as Kay Brubaker

  • (Brenda Vaccaro) "You haven't found what you're looking for. You're embarrassed about bothering me again. However, there are one or two questions more you'd like to ask me. It's something personal and you won't bother me any more."
  • (Elliott Gould) "I haven't found what I'm looking for. I feel embarrassed about bothering you again. However, there are one or two more questions I'd like to ask you. It's something personal and I won't bother you any more."

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