Christmas Special (30 Rock) Quotes

Christmas Special (30 Rock) is a television show that appeared on TV in 1970 . Christmas Special completed its run in 1970.

Christmas Special (30 Rock) Quotes

• (Jack) "I hit her. Colleen. I hit her with my car."
• (Liz Lemon) "What? Oh, my god. Is she?"
• (Jack) "She's fine. Better than fine. They're giving her a titanium hip. Like the Terminator. It's only gonna make her more powerful."

• (Liz Lemon) "Hi, I would like to speak to whoever screens the letters to Santa."
• (Irene) "Then you better talk to that box."
• (Liz Lemon) "Maybe you could help me"
• (Liz Lemon) ", Tréné --"
• (Irene) "Irene."
• (Liz Lemon) "I believe that I was the victim of a scam perpetrated through the mails, so --"
• (Irene) "There's nothing we can do."
• (Liz Lemon) "I disagree. I think there are a lot of things we could do. I would like to access any census information you have for this address --"
• (Irene) "No."
• (Liz Lemon) "In addition, I would like to speak to the letter carrier --"
• (Irene) "You know we're closing in five minutes?"
• (Liz Lemon) "-- who services this ZIP-plus-four."
• (Irene) "Never gonna happen."
• (Liz Lemon) "Can you help me out with her?"
• (Tracy Jordan) "Really? We're both black, so we must know each other?"
• (Tracy Jordan) "Hey, Irene."
• (Irene) "Hey, Tracy."
• (Tracy Jordan) "Did Vicky hook you up with this job?"
• (Tracy Jordan) "Girl, you better stop."

• (Jack) "Christmas in the Donaghy house was awful. Haven't I told you about my mom's "yuletide" boyfriend, good ol' Frederick August Otto Schwarz III?"
• (Liz Lemon) "F.A.O. Schwarz? Like the toy store?"
• (Jack) "His family owned some toy stores, yes. So what?"
• (Liz Lemon) "Jack, I think your mother put out on Christmas to get you kids presents. She did it for you."
• (Jack) "Not possible. She didn't do anything for us."
• (Liz Lemon) "I know you guys were pretty poor; did you have a lot of presents?"
• (Jack) "You couldn't even see the tree."

• (Liz Lemon) "Hey, you don't know the Post Master General, do you?"
• (Jack) "I do, but we had a falling out over the Jerry Garcia stamp. I mean, if I want to lick a hippie, I'll just return Joan Baez's phone calls."

• (Pete Hornberger) "It's gonna cost you a fortune to ship all of this."
• (Liz Lemon) "I'm taking it up there personally. I wanna see Deshante and Marcus's faces light up when they get it. Anyway, I gotta take this up to --"
• (Liz Lemon) "245th Street and Lawrence Taylor Boulevard."
• (Dot Com) "No, no, no, no, no."
• (Tracy Jordan) "I will not let you go into that neighborhood alone, in the spirit of Christmas and Kwanzo."
• (Liz Lemon) "Kwanzaa."
• (Tracy Jordan) "And shalam-shizzam to you too, my sister. We'll go with you uptown. And remember, Dot Com, you are there to protect me, and not Liz Lemon."

• (Colleen Donaghy) "Exhibit A: Your cell phone bill. You made a call to 911 at 8:16 AM. Exhibit B: The watch that my son gave me for Christmas. Not the one I wanted by the way. You had just set it before it broke of course when your car rammed into me down in Florida. And it stopped at 8:08. Exhibit C: 16-8=8. Numbers, unlike children, don't lie. What kind of son --"
• (Jack) "What kind of mother tells her son that John Kennedy died because he talked in church? Or tells her son when he was voted captain of the diving team, quote "What a great way to meet guys?" Or invites strange men over on Christmas Eve?"

• (Kenneth Parcell) "This is a religious holiday. When has religion ever caused any trouble?"

• (Jack) "I found a nursing home off Maine's coast run by the same French company that oversaw Napoleon's exile. She will be treated humanely, but there will be no escape."

• (Tracy Jordan) "What's the past tense for "scam?" Is it "scrumped?" I think you just got scrumped."

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