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Confessions of a Dangerous Mind Quotes

Confessions of a Dangerous Mind is a TV program that was first aired in 1970 . Confessions of a Dangerous Mind completed its run in 1970.

It features Andrew Lazar as producer, Alex Wurman in charge of musical score, and Newton Thomas Sigel as head of cinematography.

Confessions of a Dangerous Mind is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Confessions of a Dangerous Mind is 113 minutes long. Confessions of a Dangerous Mind is distributed by Miramax.

The cast includes: George Clooney as Jim Byrd, Sam Rockwell as Chuck Barris, Robert John Burke as Instructor Jenks, Julia Roberts as Patricia, Rutger Hauer as Keeler, Michael Ensign as Simon Oliver, and Drew Barrymore as Penny.

Confessions of a Dangerous Mind Quotes

Michael Ensign as Simon Oliver

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Sam Rockwell as Chuck Barris

  • (Sam Rockwell) "Life was sweet -- For a minute."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "When you're in a relationship it means you are obligated to give a s***."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Hi folks. Before we begin taping today, I'd like to introduce you to Mr. Peter Jenks of the Federal Communications Commission. Okay?"
  • (Peter Jenks) "I don't know if any of you are aware of this, but it's a federal offense to make lascivious remarks on a television network broadcast. The penalty for this disgusting, un-American behavior is one year in prison, or a ten thousand dollar fine. Or both. Anyone making a sick or subversive remark tonight will be arrested immediately. I then will personally escort the offender to federal prison for booking under edict number 364 of the Broadcasting Act of 1963. And it's a long drive to that prison, baby, just you and me. No witnesses."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Okay have fun everybody -- alright --"
  • (Sam Rockwell) "When you are young, your potential is infinite. You might do anything, really. You might be Einstein. You might be DiMaggio. Then you get to an age where what you might be gives way to what you have been. You weren't Einstein. You weren't anything. That's a bad moment."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "I came up with a new game-show idea recently. It's called The Old Game. You got three old guys with loaded guns onstage. They look back at their lives, see who they were, what they accomplished, how close they came to realizing their dreams. The winner is the one who doesn't blow his brains out. He gets a refrigerator."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Go back to Scotland. Get yourself some Guinness, some Lucky Charms."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Don't worry, we're not gonna cheat you"
  • (Unnamed) "Oh just the same"
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Oh, sorry 'bout your teeth"
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Hey, I got an idea. If you aren't so bad -- why don't you do it? Why don't you kill the mole? You got a problem with killing, Jim?"
  • (George Clooney) "I just don't fit the profile."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "What f***ing profile? There is no f***ing profile."
  • (George Clooney) "Okay, there's no profile."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "There's no profile."
  • (George Clooney) "Okay."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Life was sweet. For a minute."

Drew Barrymore as Penny

  • (Drew Barrymore) "Do you want me around or not? Do you even like me?"
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Ofcourse I like you. Penny --"
  • (Drew Barrymore) "How much?"
  • (Sam Rockwell) "What?"
  • (Drew Barrymore) "I need to know how much you like me."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "know what that means. How much? How could I read a person in that way?"
  • (Drew Barrymore) "You could if you felt it. If you felt it, it would be easy. You would"
  • (Drew Barrymore) "just spread your arms as wide as they would go and say: "This much, Penny.""
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Everything -- everything is complicated. Nothing is black and white like that."
  • (Drew Barrymore) "Do you want me around or not? 'Cause if you don't it's okay, just tell me."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Hey, hey --"
  • (Sam Rockwell) "I love you, Penny. In my way. Maybe not that crazy head-over-heels-thing, but what is that anyway? Romantic love, isn't that just an illusion?"
  • (Drew Barrymore) "You just said you love me, right?"
  • (Drew Barrymore) "What are you?"
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Jew."
  • (Drew Barrymore) "Oh, I had one of those once. But he was separatist. He was Ashka Nazi."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Ashkenazi."
  • (Drew Barrymore) "Right, Ashka Nazi. I haven't had one of those yet."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "You're a romantic."

Julia Roberts as Patricia

  • (Julia Roberts) "Insane asylums are filled with people who think they're Jesus or Satan. Very few have delusions of being a guy down the block who works for an insurance company."
  • (Julia Roberts) "Very good Chuck. I am pleasantly surprised, you're not like the other murderers."
  • (Julia Roberts) "You're kind of cute -- in a homely sort of way."

Rutger Hauer as Keeler

  • (Rutger Hauer) "Killing my first man was like making love to my first woman."

George Clooney as Jim Byrd

  • (George Clooney) "He's a bad guy. He's one of the bad guys."
  • (Sam Rockwell) "Bad for the US, right, Jim? Not bad in the absolute sense. Just bad for the US."
  • (George Clooney) "Don't f***in' dance with me. Renda's bad for the Tea & Biscuit Company. He's bad for me personally. You work for me. Renda's bad for me -- You're now officially a patriotic citizen of the United States of Jim Byrd. There's no backing out now. We let you in on everything. You don't play. You don't leave. You understand that? You don't play -- You don't leave."
  • (George Clooney) "Think of it as a hobby. Something you do to relax. You're an "assassination enthusiast.""
  • (George Clooney) "You're an assassination enthusiast. A murder buff."
  • (George Clooney) "You're 32 years old, and you've achieved nothing. Jesus Christ was dead and alive again by 33. You better get crackin'."

Robert John Burke as Instructor Jenks

  • (Robert John Burke) "There are several efficient methods for killing a man were you to find yourself without a weapon. The edge of your hand, against your adversary's Adam's apple. This will crush his windpipe, causing strangulation and death."
  • (Robert John Burke) "s***. I need another volunteer."

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