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Death to Smoochy Quotes

Death to Smoochy is a TV show that was first aired in 1970 . Death to Smoochy completed its run in 1970.

It features Andrew Lazar, and Peter MacGregor-Scott as producer, David Newman (composer) in charge of musical score, and Anastas N. Michos as head of cinematography.

Death to Smoochy is recorded in English and originally aired in United States, and United Kingdom. Each episode of Death to Smoochy is 109 minutes long. Death to Smoochy is distributed by Warner Bros..

The cast includes: Robin Williams as Randolph, Edward Norton as Sheldon, Pam Ferris as Cop, Danny Woodburn as Angelo Pike, Catherine Keener as Nora, Danny DeVito as Burke, Vincent Schiavelli as Buggy Ding Dong, Pam Ferris as Tommy, Harvey Fierstein as Merv Green, Jon Stewart as Marion Frank Stokes, and Michael Rispoli as Spinner Dunn.

Death to Smoochy Quotes

Vincent Schiavelli as Buggy Ding Dong

  • (Vincent Schiavelli) "I always had the hots for you. Wanna see my buggy bumper?"
  • (Vincent Schiavelli) "Hey, sorry I'm late. I fell asleep at the bus station. Scuse if I smell like piss. You know how it is."
  • (Jon Stewart) "God help us."
  • (Vincent Schiavelli) "I never saw Venice."
  • (Vincent Schiavelli) "Buggy Ding Dong will rise up from his ashes like a magnificent Phoenix. Or some other town in Arizona."

Robin Williams as Randolph

  • (Robin Williams) "Friends come in all sizes/ That's a fact, it's true/ All the colours of rainbow/ From mauve to blue/ The names are different/ The shoes don't match/ Some like to toss/ And others to catch/ One might say grasp while the other says snatch/ Because -- friends come in all sizes/ Take it from me/ Golly gee/ Size doesn't matter/ When you want some friendly patter/ From a pal who is true/ And will lift you up when you're blue/ You can count on him/ He can count on you/ It's true/ It's true/ Friends come in all sizes./"
  • (Robin Williams) "Yes, they do."
  • (Robin Williams) "Do not start with your magician's tricks young Moses. I am pharaoh. And you are my slave. And this -- is my kingdom."
  • (Robin Williams) "He's a pillow-biter, you know."
  • (Edward Norton) "I wouldn't know anything about his sleeping disorders."
  • (Robin Williams) "LET GO OF ME -- YOU f***ING JUNKIE"
  • (Robin Williams) "Look what you've done to this place. It's all Diane Fosse. When I lived here, it was Bob Fosse. Right there, I had a big painting of a naked chick holding a little plant; very tasteful, no bush -- not a picture of your f***ing mother."
  • (Robin Williams) "You know what to do with the hand lotion, you jerkoff."
  • (Robin Williams) "I loathe you."
  • (Robin Williams) "Bastard Son of Barney."
  • (Robin Williams) "Die. Die, you stuffed son of fluff. You illegitimate Teletubby. Die, you Muppet from hell."
  • (Robin Williams) "Die, you foam motherf***er."
  • (Robin Williams) "Die. Die."
  • (Danny Woodburn) "What are you doing? That's a picture in picture."
  • (Robin Williams) "-- it was an accident."
  • (Robin Williams) "You shot the rhino you f***"
  • (Vincent Schiavelli) "Randolph? Let go of me."
  • (Robin Williams) "Give me that gun -- BUGGY"
  • (Vincent Schiavelli) "No I've got to kill the rhino"
  • (Robin Williams) "Didn't she tell you of the love we once had. Passionate yet tender, old-fashioned yet experimental."
  • (Edward Norton) "Randolph, you have lost your mind."
  • (Robin Williams) "Oh, enlighten the lad, Nora. You were such a hot little brood mare, does the bridle still fit?"
  • (Edward Norton) "Hey, watch your mouth mister."
  • (Catherine Keener) "What experiments? I've had firmer handshakes, ya drunk."
  • (Robin Williams) "Please, it's small but, it's fierce."
  • (Robin Williams) "You better grow eyes in the back of your head, you horned piece of s***, because I'm not gonna sleep until worms are crawling up your foam-rubber ass. I'm goin' on safari motherf***er. SAH-FAR-I."
  • (Robin Williams) "My name isn't Wandolph. It's Randolph. Somebody touched my ass. Get away from me. Don't touch me."
  • (Robin Williams) "I've been SHOT. I'm bleeding. Somebody touched my ass."
  • (Unnamed) "How does it feel to be voted the most hated man in America, Randolph?"
  • (Robin Williams) "In a country full of Neanderthals, I wear the f***in' badge of honor."
  • (Robin Williams) "I've got Mr. Boomy, Missy."
  • (Robin Williams) "What about Wally the Whale?"
  • (Edward Norton) "Laura, how could you do it with Wally the Whale?"
  • (Robin Williams) "There she blows."
  • (Edward Norton) "I don't believe this is happening. I can't believe you didn't tell me about this."
  • (Catherine Keener) "Listen, Sheldon, I'm not proud of it but, there was a time in my life when I was a bit of a kiddie host groupie."
  • (Robin Williams) "Hello, little nipple-nibbler. The rhino's a Nazi."
  • (Robin Williams) "You want your little booger eater on my show?"
  • (Wife) "Yes, very much."
  • (Robin Williams) "Then don't tell me how to run my f***ing business."

Catherine Keener as Nora

  • (Catherine Keener) "We know you didn't kill Spinner so just cool your jets."
  • (Robin Williams) "Oh, thank you, Mother Teresa, why don't you tell that to the angry mob outside? They want my f***ing ass. I'm like a god damn toaster at Macy's; Rainbow's ass; aisle three."
  • (Catherine Keener) "You're here to sell sugar and plastic."

Danny DeVito as Burke

  • (Danny DeVito) "It's all about the dough, Shel. Once you get the money, you get the power. Once you get the power, you can have Smoochy walk out there with a dildo strapped to his head if you want."
  • (Edward Norton) "I don't think I've thought of that idea specifically, but I? I do see where you're going with this."
  • (Danny DeVito) "Sheldon, I know you got a fetish for ethics."
  • (Danny DeVito) "You're gonna be so rich, you'll be pissing on hundred dollar bills just to see the look on Franklin's face."
  • (Edward Norton) "I don't think I could ever do that. I have far too much respect for what that man accomplished."

Edward Norton as Sheldon

  • (Edward Norton) "Now I'm not pointing any fingers, Lord knows you start pointing fingers and someone's gonna get poked. And I want you both to know that its not my intention to try and -- poke either of you."
  • (Bartender) "I never saw anyone get buzzed off of orange juice."
  • (Edward Norton) "Let me tell you a secret; if you squirt a little liquid alfalfa in, it's blast off time."
  • (Edward Norton) "You just f***ed with the wrong rhino."
  • (Edward Norton) "You can't change the world but you can make a dent."
  • (Edward Norton) "Don't talk to me like that, I am not your puppet."
  • (Edward Norton) "Someone toss me a beach towel because my head is swimming."
  • (Edward Norton) "Captain Kangaroo, like Jesus Christ, was someone you could really believe in. With those guys it wasn't about the bells and whistles and the rickety rackety, it was all about the work. Especially Jesus."
  • (Edward Norton) "He slams the door He stomps his feet He sends me to bed with zilch to eat But my stepdad's not mean he's just adjusting."
  • (Edward Norton) "When my brothers and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker."
  • (Edward Norton) "I'll be in my office, the big one with a view."
  • (Catherine Keener) "They all have views, you dumb s***."
  • (Edward Norton) "Not looking this way, cupcake."
  • (Edward Norton) "Has anyone ever suggested that maybe a little yoga, maybe a high colonic or two could loosen you up a lot?"
  • (Edward Norton) "I loved Buggy Ding-Dong."
  • (Catherine Keener) "So did I, until he discovered the joys of Turkish black mule heroin."
  • (Edward Norton) "You try not to hurt anyone Roy -- What would Jesus do?"

Danny Woodburn as Angelo Pike

  • (Danny Woodburn) "Buggy."
  • (Vincent Schiavelli) "Angelo."
  • (Danny Woodburn) "I thought you cleaned up."
  • (Vincent Schiavelli) "Sure I cleaned up -- half the poppies in Asia."

Harvey Fierstein as Merv Green

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Pam Ferris as Tommy

  • (Pam Ferris) "Are you ok?"
  • (Robin Williams) "I don't know. I'm kinda f***ed up in general, so it's hard to gauge."
  • (Pam Ferris) "It's a shame this happened. Okay, now let's go pray and get s***faced."
  • (Pam Ferris) "Well, if it isn't Mr. Rainbow, how lovely to see you in the flesh -- c'mere."
  • (Pam Ferris) "Now, you want to tell me about The Rhino?"
  • (Robin Williams) "This is private property, you're f***ing trespassing --"
  • (Pam Ferris) "Danny, go give Mr. Smiley a little back rub."
  • (Pam Ferris) "Start yakkin', friend."
  • (Robin Williams) "I don't know what you're talking about. I'm minding my own business here, you're violating my private sp --"
  • (Robin Williams) "AAAAAAACE."
  • (Robin Williams) "All right, you spud sucking f***s. I'm suing your riverdance ass."
  • (Robin Williams) "I'm gonna send you all the way back hooome, huh?"
  • (Pam Ferris) "Roy, have you got the hammer?"
  • (Roy) "Always got the hammer, Tommy."
  • (Robin Williams) "I did it. It was me. It was all me. Thank god we cleared up everything without further violence."
  • (Pam Ferris) "This I guarantee: That f***in' Randolph has seen his last rainbow. We're going to find him, cut off his balls, and shove 'em up his ass."
  • (Edward Norton) "Well, maybe we should leave that for the cops, Tommy."
  • (Roy) "Cops won't do the ball thing, it's against procedure."

Michael Rispoli as Spinner Dunn

  • (Michael Rispoli) "Okay, I'm gonna go take a dump."

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