Empire Records Quotes

Empire Records is a television program that first aired in 1970 . Empire Records ended its run in 1970.

It features Tony Ludwig, Arnon Milchan, Michael Nathanson, and Alan Riche as producer, Basil Poledouris in charge of musical score, and Walt Lloyd as head of cinematography.

Empire Records is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Empire Records is 90 minutes long. Empire Records is distributed by Warner Bros..

The cast includes: Ethan Embry as Mark, Brendan Sexton III as Warren, Johnny Whitworth as A.J., Rory Cochrane as Lucas, Anthony LaPaglia as Joe, Renée Zellweger as Gina, Robin Tunney as Debra, James 'Kimo' Wills as Eddie, Liv Tyler as Corey, Coyote Shivers as Berko, Debi Mazar as Jane, Maxwell Caulfield as Rex Manning, and Ben Bode as Mitch.

Empire Records Quotes

Liv Tyler as Corey

• (Liv Tyler) "My dad always said that there's 24 usable hours in every day."

• (Liv Tyler) "Why'd you do that?"
• (Robin Tunney) "Just your typical nutty teenager in America --"
• (Robin Tunney) "Oh. Before you guys hear all about it."
• (Liv Tyler) "That's supposed to be a joke, right?"
• (Robin Tunney) "No. You're the joke."

• (Liv Tyler) "Joe, you're the best boss in the world. Can I bring Rex his lunch?"
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "Berko's taking him his lunch."
• (Liv Tyler) "Um Joe, you know that Berko's gonna insult him to his face I don't think that's such a good idea."
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "I don't care if Berko sticks an M-80 up his butt and lights it. In fact, I hope he sticks one up mine, it might be an improvement."
• (Liv Tyler) "Joe, I have to bring Rex his lunch."
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "Berko is."
• (Liv Tyler) "Joe, I need to bring him his lunch."
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "Berko is."
• (Liv Tyler) "I'M BRINGING REX HIS LUNCH."
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "-- alright."

• (Liv Tyler) "I'm not like you, I don't need to do what you do with guys."
• (Renée Zellweger) "Oh, I see, not like me, the turbo-slut."

• (Liv Tyler) "So is this how your life's gonna be now, huh? You're just gonna screw every has-been until your tits fall down and they don't want you anymore?"

Brendan Sexton III as Warren

• (Brendan Sexton III) "Stop calling me Warren. My name isn't f***ING WARREN."
• (James 'Kimo' Wills) "His name isn't Warren."
• (Liv Tyler) "His name isn't Warren."
• (Coyote Shivers) "His name isn't Warren."
• (Ethan Embry) "I thought his name was Warren?"

• (Brendan Sexton III) "Me Joe, you Jane."

Rory Cochrane as Lucas

• (Rory Cochrane) "Warren, look what you took."
• (Rory Cochrane) "Rap -- metal -- rap -- metal -- And Whitney Houston."
• (Brendan Sexton III) "It's for my girlfriend, okay?"
• (Rory Cochrane) "Suuure it is. You know, someone like you needs to diminish their criminal impulses, not magnify them. Maybe some jazz or some classical."
• (Brendan Sexton III) "Maybe you bite me."

• (Rory Cochrane) "In the immortal words of The Doors, 'The time to hesitate is through.'"

• (Rory Cochrane) "Do you know how many people there are out there?"
• (Johnny Whitworth) "Well, about 6 billion."
• (Rory Cochrane) "Really -- 6 billion -- that's a lot of people --"

• (Rory Cochrane) "I wonder if I'll be held responsible for this."

• (Rory Cochrane) "The fat man walks alone."

• (Rory Cochrane) "Joe, I think it's gonna be okay."
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "What makes you think that?"
• (Rory Cochrane) "Who knows where thoughts come from? They just appear."

• (Rory Cochrane) "Joe, is it O.K. if I leave the couch? 'Cause I'm gonna leave the couch now, okay? My ass is falling asleep, so I gotta go. I'm leaving."

• (Rory Cochrane) "I used to pee in my bed. I did. I, I wet my bed until I was ten. My mother turned me over to the county when I was ten to- not for being a bed wetter- but for being a bad seed. Anyways, 3 years went by, then Joe came. And he took me out, and I became the well adjusted person I am today."

• (Rory Cochrane) "Rap, metal, rap, metal, Whitney Houston."

• (Rory Cochrane) "I do not regret the things I have done, but those I did not do."

• (Rory Cochrane) "The long arm of the law has embraced our dear friend Warren."

• (Rory Cochrane) "Mark, who's your favorite singer?"
• (Ethan Embry) "Axl."
• (Rory Cochrane) "Well if Axl Rose was driving down the highway, and saw Rex Manning stranded on the side of the road, do you think Axl Rose would stop and help him?"
• (Ethan Embry) "-- Does Axl have a jack?"
• (Brendan Sexton III) "No way man --. Axl would pound on the gas, turn the wheel, take aim, and take that sucker out."

• (Rory Cochrane) "Mitchell's the man Joe."
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "And the man calls all the shots."
• (Rory Cochrane) "Damn the man."
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "Let me explain it to you. Mitchell's the man. I'm the idiot. You're the screw-up. And we're all losers. Welcome to music town."

• (Rory Cochrane) "Joe, I can categorically say that you are not a bigger banana-head."

Renée Zellweger as Gina

• (Renée Zellweger) "I really think Musictown is torn on the revealing garment issue."

• (Renée Zellweger) "Lucas, what are you doing in here?"
• (Rory Cochrane) "My life has reached its pinnacle. Joe is letting me close the store tonight."

• (Renée Zellweger) "Attention Rex Manning fans, to your left you will notice a shoplifter being chased by night manager, Lucas. This young man will be caught, deep fried in a vat of hot oil and served to our first hundred customers. Just another tasty treat from the gang at Empire Records."

• (Renée Zellweger) "Welcome to MusicTown, may I service you?"

• (Renée Zellweger) "Well "Sinead O'Rebellion." Shock me shock me shock me with that deviant behavior."
• (Robin Tunney) "God, that is so clever. I swear you get smarter the shorter your skirt gets."
• (Renée Zellweger) "And you get smarter the shorter your hair gets, so it's probably a good thing you went with that. It's a wonderful look for you darling."

• (Renée Zellweger) "Isn't it customary to leave the scene after committing the crime?"
• (Robin Tunney) "Definitely an amateur."

Johnny Whitworth as A.J.

• (Johnny Whitworth) "Lucas, hey Lucas. Hey Lucas. What the hell are you doin' here, man?"
• (Rory Cochrane) "Something happened to me last night. In Atlantic City."
• (Johnny Whitworth) "Oh, you went to Atlantic City?"
• (Ethan Embry) "Wow. Did you win anything?"
• (Rory Cochrane) "No. I did not win. So if you guys ever wonder if it was nice to know you, I tell you now that it was."

• (Johnny Whitworth) "You know that feeling when you get out of a warm bath -- well -- you make me feel like a bath?"

• (Johnny Whitworth) "-- you know, I got to tell her that I, uh, well, you know, that I uh --"
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "love her."
• (Johnny Whitworth) "Yeah, now how do I do that?"
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "You say I love you. What do you want, written instructions?"

• (Johnny Whitworth) "You did have hair when you went in there, right?"
• (Robin Tunney) "Yeah. It's still in the sink, if you want to glue it."

• (Johnny Whitworth) "Mark, listening to this crap is guaranteed to make you sterile."
• (Ethan Embry) "Maybe I want to be sterile."

• (Johnny Whitworth) "What's with you? Yesterday you were normal and today you're like the Chinese guy from the Karate Kid. What's with you today?"
• (Rory Cochrane) "What's with today today?"

• (Johnny Whitworth) "Hey Joe, I wanna tell Corey how I feel about her, and I thought you'd be the perfect guy for the job --"
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "Oh, yeah. My wife left me for a woman and my girlfriend forced me to leave on gunpoint. Does this qualify me?"
• (Johnny Whitworth) "Yeah, absolutely."

• (Johnny Whitworth) "Joe, I need to ask your advice. Now I know you know a lot about love and women and all that sort of thing --"
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "Oh yeah, my wife left me for another woman and my girlfriend forced me to leave at gunpoint. Does this qualify me?"
• (Johnny Whitworth) "Oh yeah, definitely."

• (Johnny Whitworth) "Hi, what're you doing up here?"
• (Liv Tyler) "You listen to me. You're so special and you're so talented and you have everything it takes. You have MORE than everything it takes and you're REALLY stupid because you don't know that. And I know you don't love me anymore, and I know that I blew it but at least I know that, and if you don't go to art school and if you don't understand how special you are then you know nothing."
• (Johnny Whitworth) "Corey, I --"
• (Liv Tyler) "And I did love you, and I still -- only I didn't realise that it really was love because it was more than love and it wasn't just some stupid feeling in my stomach like everything else and I'll never love anybody as much as you and I hate you. I hate you."
• (Johnny Whitworth) "Corey, I quit. I quit."
• (Johnny Whitworth) "I'm going to art school, in Boston. So I can be near you."

Ethan Embry as Mark

• (Ethan Embry) "Empire Records, open 'til midnight, this is Mark."
• (Ethan Embry) "Midnight."

• (Ethan Embry) "Hey, Lucas. I've decided I'm going to start a band."
• (Rory Cochrane) "The first thing you need is a name. Then you'll know what kind of band you've got."
• (Ethan Embry) "Right, right. I was thinking about, um, Marc. How does that sound?"
• (Rory Cochrane) "Is that with a C or with a K?"
• (Ethan Embry) "Well my name is with a"
• (Ethan Embry) "K, so I was thinking my band's name could be with a C. That way it's kind of that psychedelic, you know, trip thing."
• (Rory Cochrane) "Always play with their minds."

• (Ethan Embry) "We mustn't dwell -- no, not today. We CAN'T. Not on Rex Manning day."

• (Ethan Embry) "Damn the man. Save the Empire."

James 'Kimo' Wills as Eddie

• (James 'Kimo' Wills) "They're my special recipe -- and you know what that means -- Lots of sugar."

• (James 'Kimo' Wills) "Can I ask you something? Do you know where Harvard is?"
• (Johnny Whitworth) "It's near Boston."
• (James 'Kimo' Wills) "No I mean, do you really know where Harvard is? It's another planet man- another universe. Totally unlike the one we know. Filled with big blond guys who eat ivy and row boats. What I'm trying to say is, you and Corey just aren't made for each other. She's different from you."

Anthony LaPaglia as Joe

• (Anthony LaPaglia) "Deb, what are you doing?"
• (Robin Tunney) "I just wanted to have a little chat with Warren."
• (Brendan Sexton III) "Oh yeah? Well have a little chat with my gun."
• (Robin Tunney) "What do you want Warren?"
• (Brendan Sexton III) "STOP CALLING ME WARREN. MY NAME ISN'T f***ING WARREN."
• (Robin Tunney) "Well you can't kill me 'cause I'm already dead. And I talked to God, and she says, "Yo, wassup?" and she wants you to lose the gun."
• (Brendan Sexton III) "What? You are psycho. You're a psycho."

• (Anthony LaPaglia) "Gina, you'd better go home."
• (Renée Zellweger) "Am I fired?"
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "Have I fired anyone today? No. Why would I start with you?"

Robin Tunney as Debra

• (Robin Tunney) "I went to rock and roll heaven, and I wasn't on the guest list."

• (Robin Tunney) "No visible tattoos."
• (Renée Zellweger) "No revealing clothing."
• (Robin Tunney) "We're both screwed. At least you're used to it."

• (Robin Tunney) "I guess nobody really has it all together, huh?"
• (Liv Tyler) "No."
• (Robin Tunney) "I feel like I should welcome you to the neighborhood or something. Anyway, did you really want to do Rex Manning in the count-out room? Is that how you always imagined your first time would be? Your back up against the daily totals and your feet pounding against the safe? 'Oh Rexy stop that. You're so sexy.'"
• (Liv Tyler) "Why are you being so nice to me?"
• (Robin Tunney) "Let's save our Hallmark moment."

• (Robin Tunney) "Hey Lucas, is it true you committed the perfect crime?"
• (Rory Cochrane) "Not entirely perfect."

Maxwell Caulfield as Rex Manning

• (Maxwell Caulfield) "Why don't you all just fade away."

Debi Mazar as Jane

• (Debi Mazar) "Actually, his new album tested well among teenage males."
• (Rory Cochrane) "Jane, did you compare the percentage of teenage male Rex Manning fans to the incidence of homosexuality amongst teenage males?"

• (Debi Mazar) "What are you doing later?"
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "I don't know. I'm either going to jail or hell I can't decide."

Ben Bode as Mitch

• (Ben Bode) "Why do I get the feeling that I'm being royally screwed?"
• (Anthony LaPaglia) "Because you are, Mitch."

Coyote Shivers as Berko

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