Garfield: The Movie Quotes

Garfield: The Movie is a TV program that appeared on TV in 1970 . Garfield: The Movie completed its run in 1970.

It features John Davis (producer) as producer, Christophe Beck in charge of musical score, and Dean Cundey as head of cinematography.

Each episode of Garfield: The Movie is 85 minutes long. Garfield: The Movie is distributed by 20th Century Fox.

The cast includes: Breckin Meyer as Jon Arbuckle, Bill Murray as Garfield, Jennifer Love Hewitt as Liz, David Eigenberg as Nermal, Nick Cannon as Louis, Debra Messing as Arlene, Brad Garrett as Luca, Alan Cumming as Persnikitty, Jimmy Kimmel as Spanky, Stephen Tobolowsky as Happy Chapman, Eve Brent as Mrs. Baker, Richard Kind as Dad Rat, and Debra Jo Rupp as Mom Rat.

Garfield: The Movie Quotes

Stephen Tobolowsky as Happy Chapman

• (Stephen Tobolowsky) "I believe you've found my dog. He answers to Odie."
• (Eve Brent) "Odie?"
• (Stephen Tobolowsky) "Family name."

• (Stephen Tobolowsky) "If I could get my hands on a really talented dog, wouldn't Walter J"
• (Stephen Tobolowsky) "just choke on his Emmy?"

• (Stephen Tobolowsky) "Nice kitty."
• (Bill Murray) "Let's see what's on the news."

• (Stephen Tobolowsky) "I hate lasagna."

• (Stephen Tobolowsky) "Be happy."

• (Stephen Tobolowsky) "Good morning, New York. I know you're gonna' flip for Odie, because he sure is flipping for you"
• (Stephen Tobolowsky) "."

Bill Murray as Garfield

• (Bill Murray) "This rescue thing is exhausting. When do heroes get to eat?"

• (Bill Murray) "Beep, beep. Cat coming through. Beep, beep. Going through the tunnel"
• (Bill Murray) ". I just had to do that."

• (Bill Murray) "Sir Roland?"
• (Alan Cumming) "In the fur."

• (Bill Murray) "Down, dumb dog."
• (Bill Murray) "Whoa -- what part of "no" don't you understand? The push-off-the-chair?"
• (Bill Murray) "Off. I don't wanna play."
• (Bill Murray) "Look, what am I supposed to say? Thanks, for saving my hide with Luca? Okay, thanks for saving my hide with Luca."
• (Bill Murray) "Get off."

• (Bill Murray) "Garfield is leaving the building."

• (Bill Murray) "I've found that if you wait long enough, everything comes to you."

• (Bill Murray) "How can this dog be such a problem when he's not even here anymore?"

• (Bill Murray) "Jon, you had me a chick magnet, and now you got a tick magnet."
• (David Eigenberg) "Garfield, Jon brought a dog home."
• (Bill Murray) "I'm aware, Nermal."
• (David Eigenberg) "Why would he do a thing like that?"
• (Bill Murray) "Gee, I don't know, Nermal."
• (David Eigenberg) "Well it just sounds like a weird thing to do, bringing a dog into a house that already has a cat."
• (Bill Murray) "Can we drop it? I mean it's no big deal. It's just a splattered bug on the windshield of my life."
• (David Eigenberg) "A -- bug?"
• (Bill Murray) "A dim-witted, smelly, goofy -- splattered bug that I will deal with properly and enthusiastically."
• (Breckin Meyer) "Come on, boy."
• (Bill Murray) "As you can see, I'm still Jon's favorite."
• (David Eigenberg) "See you later, Garfield. Good luck with the bug thing."

• (Bill Murray) "So much time, and so little -- I need to do."

• (Bill Murray) "Schmuck."

• (Bill Murray) "Huh? That's his last name, Schnitzel?"

• (Bill Murray) "Sure, Jon. I'll eat all your lasagna for you."

• (Bill Murray) "I'll purr like a Ferrari. Make that a Jaguar."

• (Bill Murray) "Its just a trainset, only bigger."

• (Bill Murray) "Jon, its not too late. Quickly, turn around, before he finds out where we live. Please, take this trouser snooper back."

• (Bill Murray) "Houston. we have a problem. Odie, get off the pail. Would you get off the pail, please? Alright, time for a new game. It's called "My Claw In Your Butt" game. Come on. Get back here. I'll just use my left claw. If my legs were longer I would have caught you by now. Come back here. Just a second."
• (Bill Murray) "Slow -- down --"

• (Bill Murray) "Why, why has this happened? I was the one -- it was all about me. Not about some -- stupid, sniffling, smelly, high-maintenance -- disco dog."

• (Bill Murray) "I'd say the refrigerator is unguarded."

• (Bill Murray) "These are the kind of seats you get when you book at the last minute."

• (Bill Murray) "Um, Mom? Is that you?"
• (Jimmy Kimmel) "I had to see it with my own eyes. A cat saving a dog."
• (Alan Cumming) "All for one and one for all."
• (Bill Murray) "Sir Roland?"
• (Alan Cumming) "In the fur."
• (Bill Murray) "What are you guys all doing here? Are you traveling today too?"
• (Jimmy Kimmel) "We've been following your scent since the pound."
• (Bill Murray) "What are you guys all doing here?"
• (Alan Cumming) "We're here to help."
• (Richard Kind) "Well, well, well. We meet again."
• (Debra Jo Rupp) "I say we eat the fat, arrogant fool."
• (Bill Murray) "No, no, please let me live."
• (Nick Cannon) "Not you, Garfield. Chrome dome over there."

• (Bill Murray) "Yeah, just one big, happy family."
• (Bill Murray) "Yeah, right. Hit the floor."
• (Bill Murray) "No, come on, seriously, you can come up. Come here, buddy, come up."
• (Bill Murray) "Down you go."
• (Bill Murray) "We just hit it off so great because we both love the same thing and that is --"
• (Bill Murray) "me."

• (Bill Murray) "I'm banged in the nose again."

• (Bill Murray) "We kinda got off on the wrong paw."

• (Bill Murray) "Strong finish, little buddy."

• (Bill Murray) "Oh, Sleeping Beauty, wake up. You can stop dreaming about me, because I'm here. Now just wake up. You got work to do. You're not just my owner, you're my primary caregiver. Now be a --"
• (Breckin Meyer) "Not now, Garfield."
• (Bill Murray) "Get- A- Ah- Just- All right. Cut the sweet stuff. Easy now. Just-"
• (Bill Murray) "Trying to cuddle with me, huh? Trying to avoid your duties, eh? Well, that just ain't gonna fly. It isn't gonna work with me. See, I'm getting my exercise, doin' my job. Just one quick CANNONBALL."
• (Bill Murray) "Morning."
• (Breckin Meyer) "Garfield."

• (Bill Murray) "Maybe I'll get a CAT scan. A CAT scan?"

• (Bill Murray) "I have tags, I just left them in my other fur."

• (Bill Murray) "It looks much smaller on the box."

• (Bill Murray) "Well, hello."
• (Brad Garrett) "Garfield, always working the angles. Thinks he's so slick."
• (Bill Murray) "If you have any itches, I'm available for a scratch."
• (Debra Messing) "Go play in traffic."
• (Bill Murray) "Alone? Come on, Arlene. I'm a simple cat. All I want is shelter, lasagna and to be loved, for maybe five times a day."
• (Debra Messing) "Hah. Not in my nine lives."
• (Brad Garrett) "In your face, Garfield."
• (Bill Murray) "Come on Arlene --"
• (Bill Murray) "Oh baby, you smell so good."
• (Debra Messing) "You think I'm gonna fall for a line like that?"
• (Bill Murray) "I can already taste you from here, my love, my desire. I worship you. I dream of you. I'm humbled, and crumbled in your presence."
• (Debra Messing) "Garfield, I didn't realise your feelings ran so deep."
• (Bill Murray) "Oh uh -- excuse me, baby. Could you wait right here until after I finish my lunch?"
• (Debra Messing) "Huh? Oh, Garfield. You're impossible."

• (Bill Murray) "Oops. Hey Odie, help me. I can't get up. Oh my friend, bring me some ice. Will you hurry up you dumb dog? I'm in pain."

• (Bill Murray) "You just can't do this, Jon. He's trying to tear us apart, don't you see that? You know me. I'm too lazy to try to destroy your house. I was provoked, pushed, prodded, driven mad. You can't kick me out of my own house like I'm some kind of animal."
• (Bill Murray) "Oh come on, Jon. Jon. You know I'm scared of the dark."

• (Bill Murray) "Maybe he's fetching the paper for the neighbors?"

• (Bill Murray) "Don't cry, I know what's it like to be unloved. Well, you do."

• (Bill Murray) "I'll make it up to Odie tomorrow. I'll teach him how to drink out of the toilet."

• (Bill Murray) "You had me at hello."

• (Bill Murray) "Good luck with the plague and rabies and everything."

• (Bill Murray) "Poor Odie. He faces a life of torture, neglect and degradation -- Hey, nobody gets to mistreat my dog like that except me."

• (Bill Murray) "Odie, would you mind sharing the remote, please? Every dog has his day, Happy."

• (Bill Murray) "Can we slow down? I've been doing this running thing all day and I am over it."

• (Bill Murray) "I hate Mondays."

• (Bill Murray) "If I didn't have a box over my head, I'd be humiliated."

• (Bill Murray) "I love the smell of Cinnamon Apple in the morning. It smells like victory."

• (Bill Murray) "Why am I being surrounded here? Some of my best friends are vermin."

• (Bill Murray) "I'm in a New Dog State of Mind."

• (Bill Murray) "Luca, do me a favor and eat him for me, please?"

• (Bill Murray) "Madam, I'm a cat in trouble. I'm hitching a ride in your mumu."

• (Bill Murray) "Oh, great. Dog coodies. Somebody innoculate me, please?"

• (Bill Murray) "Oh, my poor nose."

• (Bill Murray) "oooooohhhhhh -- that was a cheap shot"
• (Bill Murray) "hey, I saw this and I thought -- pretty sure it was your --"
• (Bill Murray) "oh, I love to dish it out."

• (Bill Murray) "Jon, you're denser than ever."

• (Bill Murray) "I'm walking the dog. You probably should have practiced in the garage before you stepped up to someone of my level."

• (Bill Murray) "Come to papa, baby."

• (Bill Murray) "Hey, they could have used you in Alcatraz. I just wanted to say, thanks Your Majesty. And break a leg."

• (Bill Murray) "Nice accessory, but I don't think I want to play dress-up with you, pal."

• (Bill Murray) "When he sees you he expects more from me."

• (Bill Murray) "Ah, and that's a sign that the tank is full."

• (Bill Murray) "I think -- I'm going to blow cat chow chunks."

• (Bill Murray) "Oh, taxi. Step on it, will you driver?"

• (Bill Murray) "I know you can't hear me, but can't you just listen?"

• (Bill Murray) "Yeah, wish me luck with the nightmares."

• (Bill Murray) "There's my ball."

• (Bill Murray) "Walk the porch. I'm walking the dog."

• (Bill Murray) "Its always got to be smashing and crashing. Nobody poisons anymore."

• (Bill Murray) "Another day ruined."
• (Bill Murray) "Oh, you little suck-up."

• (Bill Murray) "Let me tell you something, Happy. To you, Odie might be just a dumb, stupid, smelly dog. But to me,"
• (Bill Murray) "he's all that and much more. He's my friend."
• (Bill Murray) "Odie, try something else. Maybe there's a game on."

• (Bill Murray) "Jon. Jon. Odie is on TV, and he's wearing liederhosen."

• (Bill Murray) "Hey, McGillicuddy. There's an animal felony happening right there behind you."

• (Bill Murray) "I just need a little quality time with man's real best friend, television."

• (Bill Murray) "Why don't you draw him a map?"

• (Bill Murray) "That wasn't my stomach, was it?"

• (Bill Murray) "Pookie, cover me. I'm going in."

• (Bill Murray) "If it isn't Unhappy Chappy."

• (Bill Murray) "Hey, tall dark and human? What's for breakfast?"

• (Bill Murray) "I slept like a fat cat."

Breckin Meyer as Jon Arbuckle

• (Breckin Meyer) "What am I gonna do with you?"
• (Bill Murray) "Love me, feed me, never leave me."

• (Breckin Meyer) "Some part of me has always wanted to know what it would be like to have a pet that actually wants to play with you."

• (Breckin Meyer) "Garfield, did you eat all four boxes of lasagna?"
• (Bill Murray) "It's not my fault. They started it."

• (Breckin Meyer) "First Odie, and now Garfield. I am the worst pet owner on the planet."

• (Breckin Meyer) "I'll call you later. Garfield is being -- Garfield."

• (Breckin Meyer) "Mouse."
• (Bill Murray) "No thanks, I'm full."
• (Breckin Meyer) "Get him Garfield."
• (Bill Murray) "Get him Jon."

• (Breckin Meyer) "No, Odie's not a hounddog. Yes, I'm sure."

Nick Cannon as Louis

• (Nick Cannon) "Meals on wheels."
• (Bill Murray) "Don't let anybody see us jumping out; we'd ruin this guy's business."

• (Nick Cannon) "I don't do the vertical thing."

Brad Garrett as Luca

• (Brad Garrett) "You're gonna' get it good today."
• (Bill Murray) "I make it a point to get it good, everyday."

• (Brad Garrett) "You're on the wrong side of the street, fat cat. Beat it."
• (Bill Murray) "And you, Luca. You're on the wrong side of the evolutionary curve."

• (Brad Garrett) "Oh, I've been waiting years for this."
• (Bill Murray) "Would that be regular years, or dog years?"

• (Brad Garrett) "Hey, what are you looking at?"
• (Bill Murray) "Nothing. Just looking for some company."
• (David Eigenberg) "Keep walking, creepo."
• (Bill Murray) "What's going on?"
• (Debra Messing) "We know how much you hated Odie. We know how much you wanted him gone."
• (Bill Murray) "Wait a minute. All I wanted was to sleep in my own bed."
• (Debra Messing) "And to do it, you cast Odie out into the cold, cruel world?"
• (David Eigenberg) "We saw you locked Odie out last night."
• (Bill Murray) "Gee, I don't believe you guys. I didn't know Odie was gonna run away. He's a dumb dog. No offense, Luca."
• (Brad Garrett) "Uh -- what?"
• (Bill Murray) "You can't blame me for that."
• (David Eigenberg) "Any one of us could be next."
• (Debra Messing) "Yeah. There's no room for anybody else in Garfield's world."
• (Bill Murray) "Oh that was a little traumatic. Well maybe I've been a little -- tough in protecting my turf, but, um -- I don't hate the guy."

Alan Cumming as Persnikitty

• (Alan Cumming) "Will you please keep quiet? God, god. Oh, this really is too much."
• (Bill Murray) "Hey, Persnikitty. Happy Chapman's cat. What are you doing here?"
• (Alan Cumming) "I was his cat, until I outlived my purpose. And then he replaced me with a dog and dumped me in this wretched place. All humans are the same."
• (Bill Murray) "Not my owner. He only does what's best for me. He puts up with me and he feeds me."
• (Alan Cumming) "And he lets you vacation in this charming animal pound. Hello."
• (Bill Murray) "Not for long, Persnikitty."
• (Alan Cumming) "Would you please just stop calling me that? My name isn't really Persnikitty. It's Sir Roland."
• (Bill Murray) "Sir Roland."
• (Alan Cumming) "Yeah, that's another one of Happy Chapman's acts of cruelty. I was trained in a classical theater, you know, mm-hmm. But now I'm a celebrity cable castoff cat, with a name I can never live down."
• (Bill Murray) "Well this may hurt a little, but, I'm trying to rescue the dog that replaced you, Persnikitty -- I mean, Roland. Happy and Odie are getting on a train in less than two hours, to become regulars on Good Day New York."
• (Jimmy Kimmel) "Wait a minute. Did I just hear that? You're a cat that's trying to rescue a dog?"
• (Bill Murray) "It's true, I know, it's a crime against nature. At first I thought he was a pain but, he's grown on me like a wart you wanna have removed until you realized it defines you in some funny way."
• (Alan Cumming) "You know what, that is absolutely charming."
• (Jimmy Kimmel) "Let me ask you one question, chubby. What are you talking about?"
• (Bill Murray) "How could you understand? He's my friend."

• (Alan Cumming) "When I give the signal, run like a mad cow."

• (Alan Cumming) "Eat hairballs, Happy Chapman."

Debra Messing as Arlene

• (Debra Messing) "Garfield, are you alright?"
• (Bill Murray) "I think so. Luca's about to have Odie for lunch."
• (Debra Messing) "If it wasn't for Odie, you'd be Luca's chew toy."
• (David Eigenberg) "Yeah, he saved your life. Odie's a hero."
• (Bill Murray) "Why, because I wasn't ripped to shreds? No. Odie's an imbecile until further notice."

• (Debra Messing) "Poor Odie. That cat is such a pig."
• (David Eigenberg) "Garfield's a pig?"
• (Debra Messing) "You never leave the dog out at night."
• (David Eigenberg) "Why not?"
• (Debra Messing) "Because dogs run away."

Jennifer Love Hewitt as Liz

• (Jennifer Love Hewitt) "There's nothing wrong with Garfield. He's just a happy, fat, lazy cat."
• (Bill Murray) "No need for a second opinion."

• (Jennifer Love Hewitt) "So um -- what's your confession -- admission -- declaration?"

• (Jennifer Love Hewitt) "You care about him, more than any owner I've ever known."
• (Bill Murray) "Him has a name. Is this an HMO?"

David Eigenberg as Nermal

• (David Eigenberg) "Garfield, Jon's taking Odie on his date with Liz and he's leaving you behind."
• (Bill Murray) "I know, Nermal."
• (David Eigenberg) "They're off on an adventure and you're still here."
• (Bill Murray) "And your point is?"
• (David Eigenberg) "Well, that's gotta feel bad, being left by Jon while he takes Odie out, it's like -- you're not his favorite anymore."
• (Bill Murray) "Hey, what do you say we play brain surgeon? Would you go get my power tools? Hmm --"
• (Bill Murray) "This is so sad. Jon has completely lost his mind. He doesn't realize how important I am to him."

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