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Joe Somebody Quotes

Joe Somebody is a television show that was first aired in 1970 . Joe Somebody completed its run in 1970.

It features Kenneth Atchity as producer, George S. Clinton in charge of musical score, and Daryn Okada as head of cinematography.

Joe Somebody is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Joe Somebody is 98 minutes long. Joe Somebody is distributed by 20th Century Fox.

The cast includes: Tim Allen as Joe, Julie Bowen as Meg Harper, Tim Allen as Joe Scheffer, Hayden Panettiere as Natalie Scheffer, Jim Belushi as Chuck, Ken Marino as Rick, and Kelly Lynch as Callie.

Joe Somebody Quotes

Julie Bowen as Meg Harper

  • (Julie Bowen) "You're having a panic attack, do you know what that means?"
  • (Tim Allen) "It sounds pretty self-explanatory."

Hayden Panettiere as Natalie Scheffer

  • (Hayden Panettiere) "HEY, that guy is an ass-wipe."
  • (Tim Allen) "NATALIE.."
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "Sorry, I meant "ass-guy"."
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "OH, my god."
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "WHAT ARE YOU, like 12? The guy's gonna hit you back. He's got ARMS."
  • (Tim Allen) "What are you doing her? Don't you have school?"
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "I needed to see you."
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "Everything on the menu was made with curd. Curd this, curd that. I MEAN, I ordered a hamburger and I got a ten-minute lecture on animal rights from the waitress. AND the guy in the play was half naked."
  • (Tim Allen) "WHAT? Which half?"
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "Dad, just tell me something. Is it you don't wanna see me. Or is it you don't want me to see you?"
  • (Tim Allen) "Yes -- Yes to the second one."
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "DAD, just please let me come over. Just for a little while.."
  • (Tim Allen) "It's okay. Everything's all right. I'm just sittin' here drowning my sorrows in a-- a quart of Ben and Jerrys Chunky Monkey."
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "Why do I have to spend weekends with them? Can't we just drive by every Saturday and wave?"
  • (Tim Allen) "Your mom's a little eccentric. Think of her as an exotic flower."
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "And that made you what? Dirt?"
  • (Tim Allen) "NAT, she's your mom."

Tim Allen as Joe Scheffer

  • (Tim Allen) "Do people ever come back here?"
  • (Tim Allen) "You talkin' to me?"
  • (Tim Allen) "We gotta get you back to school."
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "DAD, I really wanna talk about this."
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "You know that big jerk took it easy on you, right? What makes you think he wont kill you this time? HUH? Natalie; DAD."
  • (Tim Allen) "You mad your point."
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "GOOD."
  • (Tim Allen) "Can you show me some of that Crouching Dragon, Hidden Tiger stuff?"
  • (Tim Allen) "That's Mark McKinney. He's a seven-year employee. W-what's he doing in the ten-year lot?"
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "Maybe he's gonna stand around for another three years."
  • (Tim Allen) "Excuse me I'm looking for Meg Harper, do you know where she is?"
  • (Unnamed) "She's on the roof."
  • (Tim Allen) "The roof? are you sure?"
  • (Unnamed) "Son, she's a 31 year old woman and I'm a 72 year old man, I know where to find her."
  • (Tim Allen) "Your become a farmer?"
  • (Ken Marino) "No, Joe, I'm an actor dressed as a farmer -- for an audition."
  • (Tim Allen) "Sorry."

Jim Belushi as Chuck

  • (Jim Belushi) "Too bad. I was really hoping to give a s***."

Kelly Lynch as Callie

  • (Kelly Lynch) "We had a great weekend. Did she tell you about the play?"
  • (Tim Allen) "Yeah. The actors were naked."
  • (Hayden Panettiere) "So were the ushers."
  • (Kelly Lynch) "They were not."
  • (Tim Allen) "Callie, Beauty and The Beast is in town. What's a matter with that?"

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