Kalifornia Quotes

Kalifornia is a TV program that first aired in 1970 . Kalifornia stopped airing in 1970.

It features Steve Golin, Aristides McGarry, and Sigurjón Sighvatsson as producer, Carter Burwell in charge of musical score, and Bojan Bazelli as head of cinematography.

Kalifornia is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Kalifornia is 117 minutes long. Kalifornia is distributed by Gramercy Picturessfn Cettl 2003 and p=237.

The cast includes: David Duchovny as Brian Kessler, Juliette Lewis as Adele Corners, Brad Pitt as Early Grayce, Michelle Forbes as Carrie Laughlin, Mars Callahan as Walter Livesy, Brett Rice as Parole Officer, Sierra Pecheur as Mrs. Musgrave, and John Dullaghan as Mr. Musgrave.

Kalifornia Quotes

John Dullaghan as Mr. Musgrave

• (John Dullaghan) "That you peaches? Sweetheart, you gotta come over here. It's so clear, you won't believe it. It's just amazing. Come on over. Take a look, honey. I want you to see this."
• (John Dullaghan) "Peaches?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "Early? Early."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Ahm, ahm, ahm."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Guess what, Early? Ms. Mustgrave has this guest house in the back -- and it's real, real beautiful, and it's empty hon. She said that if you and me wanted to --"
• (Sierra Pecheur) "Hank."
• (Sierra Pecheur) "Hank."
• (Brad Pitt) "Well, you're a widow now, Peaches."

Brad Pitt as Early Grayce

• (Brad Pitt) "What's your name, boy?"
• (Mars Callahan) "Walter Livesy."
• (Brad Pitt) "Well, I think I gotta kill you, Walter. How you feel about that?"
• (Mars Callahan) "Not so good. Are you sure you have to?"
• (Brad Pitt) "Don't know. Wish I did."
• (Michelle Forbes) "Early, please be."
• (Brad Pitt) "Shut up. Goddammit. I'm trying to have a conversation with Walter. Sorry about that, Walter. Where you from?"
• (Mars Callahan) "Vernon, Florida."
• (Brad Pitt) "Don't know it. Any hunting?"
• (Mars Callahan) "Turkeys sometimes."
• (Brad Pitt) "Yeah, turkeys are real smart. Smarter than most people think. Tell you what, Walter. I want you down on your belly. Get on your belly. I want you to stay there a long time after we leave. We got a deal, son?"
• (Mars Callahan) "Yeah. Yes, sir. You mind if I hold onto that Bible over there?"
• (Brad Pitt) "What do you want with a Bible, Walter? Huh? He thinks I'm gonna kill him. Now that would make me a liar, wouldn't it?"
• (Mars Callahan) "No."
• (Brad Pitt) "No?"

• (Brad Pitt) "I ain't riding no bus, bitch."
• (Brad Pitt) "Get over there, and keep quiet."
• (Brad Pitt) "Knew that boy would have a hogleg around here somewhere."
• (Brad Pitt) "Not a word."
• (Brad Pitt) "Hello. Get over here, skinny. Sit your ass in that corner. Come on."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Honey, whatcha doing?"
• (Brad Pitt) "They gave us the boot, mama. Go on out to the car and keep Brian busy. I don't want him coming in here."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Honey, you're scaring me."
• (Brad Pitt) "Right now, missy. Get."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Hi."
• (David Duchovny) "Hi."
• (Juliette Lewis) "I'm just getting my things, and then I'll leave."
• (David Duchovny) "Don't forget your yo-yo. Listen, Adele. The reason you aren't coming along for the rest of the trip doesn't have anything to do with you guys. It has something to do with me and Carrie."

• (Brad Pitt) "Tell me, big shot, how you gonna write a book about something you know nothing about?"

• (Brad Pitt) "Some day me and Adele be walking down the road and we'll see your book and we'll buy it and put it on our coffee table."

• (Brad Pitt) "Momma? What are you crying for? I'm the one who got hit."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Cos I decided, Early, I'm not gonna climb up that Hollywood sign with you."
• (Brad Pitt) "And why not?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "Cos you're mean, Early."
• (Brad Pitt) "No, I'm not."
• (Juliette Lewis) "You hurt those people, Early. I don't wanna do it with you. I loved you, Early. You just be quiet. You are mean."

• (Brad Pitt) "Reebs. That's what we used to call them when we was kids. It's beer spelled backwards."

• (Brad Pitt) "I was reading in your deal there how they never caught that Black Dolly killer."
• (David Duchovny) "Black Dahlia."
• (Brad Pitt) "Yeah."
• (David Duchovny) "They didn't."
• (Brad Pitt) "I was wondering how come. See what I'm getting at? It's like 'Hmm?'."
• (David Duchovny) "Well, some people think he just stopped killing and disappeared back into society."
• (Brad Pitt) "That's fine and dandy, but I wanna know what a smart fella like yourself thinks."
• (David Duchovny) "I always thought it was the work of a serial killer. You know, anybody who took such time and care bisecting another human being."
• (Brad Pitt) "Bisecting?"
• (David Duchovny) "You know, he cut them in two."
• (Brad Pitt) "Oh, he hacked them up?"
• (David Duchovny) "In two pieces, yeah. In half. Anybody who did that much have been enjoying it and he would have done it again and again until someone stopped him."
• (Brad Pitt) "That's good. That's a good theory, Bri. You wanna hear mine?"
• (David Duchovny) "Sure."
• (Brad Pitt) "OK. Ain't you gonna record it?"
• (David Duchovny) "Early Grace's Black Dahlia theory. June 23rd."
• (Brad Pitt) "OK. Now, I'm betting his still alive. Real old, living in a trailer park or something, somewheres. But he's alive, see. Now, he's thinking about what he's done, going over it and over it in his head, every night, thinking how smart he is for getting away with it."

• (Brad Pitt) "Boring."
• (Brad Pitt) "Boring."
• (Brad Pitt) "Dog s***."
• (Brad Pitt) "Now that don't leave much to the imagination, does it?"
• (Brad Pitt) "I know him."
• (Brad Pitt) "That's my daddy. f***er."
• (Brad Pitt) "Boring"
• (Brad Pitt) "That's you ain't it?"
• (Michelle Forbes) "Yeah, that's me. Do you like it? What do you think?"
• (Brad Pitt) "Dog s***."
• (Brad Pitt) "Boring."
• (Brad Pitt) "Stinky."
• (Brad Pitt) "Stinky."
• (Brad Pitt) "You gotta learn how to control your woman better. But lucky for you, they take all kinds in California. That's where we'll be tomorrow. California."

• (Brad Pitt) "What is that?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "That's Lucy. Hey, that's mine."
• (Brad Pitt) "Adele, what kind of cuckoo-brain carries a cactus in her purse? Huh?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "I don't know."
• (Brad Pitt) "Straighten up."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Oh Jesus, Early, they look kinda weird."
• (Brad Pitt) "Will you just smile and let me do the talking."
• (Juliette Lewis) "How many times are you going to tell me that?"
• (Brad Pitt) "As many times it takes, Adele."

• (Brad Pitt) "What's your name boy?"
• (Mars Callahan) "Wal; Walter Livesy."
• (Brad Pitt) "Well, Walter. Think I gotta kill you. How do you feel about that?"
• (Mars Callahan) "Not so good. You sure you have to."
• (Brad Pitt) "I don't know. Wish I did."
• (Michelle Forbes) "Early please."
• (Brad Pitt) "Shut up."
• (Brad Pitt) "god****it. I'm trying to have a conversation with Walter."
• (Brad Pitt) "Sorry about that Walter."
• (Brad Pitt) "Where you from, boy?"
• (Mars Callahan) "Vernon, Florida."
• (Brad Pitt) "Never heard of it. Any hunting?"
• (Mars Callahan) "Yeah, sometimes. Turkey mostly though."
• (Brad Pitt) "Yeah, turkeys are real smart. Smarter than most people think."
• (Brad Pitt) "Tell you what, Walter. I want you down on your belly."
• (Brad Pitt) "Get on your belly. Now I want you to stay there. You stay there for a very long time after we leave. We got a deal?"
• (Mars Callahan) "Yes, sir."
• (Brad Pitt) "Ok, then."
• (Mars Callahan) "Would you mind if I hold onto that bible?"
• (Brad Pitt) "What you want your bible for?"
• (Brad Pitt) "He thinks I'm going to kill him. Well now that would make me a liar, wouldn't it?"
• (Mars Callahan) "No, sir."
• (Brad Pitt) "Well"
• (Brad Pitt) "here you go, Walter."
• (Brad Pitt) "I wonder if Adele would like one of these"
• (Brad Pitt) "Nah."

• (Brad Pitt) "Is it just me, or did this trip go downhill since we ran out of Lucky lager."

• (Brad Pitt) "Look mama, there's a purdy little house. Maybe they got some beer."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Look at all the cactuses. They sure are beautiful. You know what makes a cactus so strong? You can forget about them forever and they'd just keep on growing."
• (David Duchovny) "Adele listen, we got to do something before Early kills someone else."
• (Juliette Lewis) "And they breed."
• (David Duchovny) "Adele."
• (David Duchovny) "Would you listen to me?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "You can't do anything Brian. Just sit still."

• (Brad Pitt) "How long have you had your woman, bud?"
• (David Duchovny) "Three years."
• (Brad Pitt) "Yeah? She's a good one. She's a breeder, you dog."
• (David Duchovny) "I'll tell her you said she's a breeder. She'll like that. I'll tell her that."

• (Brad Pitt) "Only thing my old man ever gave me was this god****.45. Japanese but it's pretty good. Go on, shoot it."
• (David Duchovny) "No, I never did this. I don't know how to do this."
• (Brad Pitt) "Yeah, you can do it. Point and shoot the damn thing. No, bud, you're jerking it. You're all like this. You gotta hold it soft, like your pecker. OK?"

• (Brad Pitt) "You haven't even said thank you."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Thank you."
• (Brad Pitt) "Thank you for what, Adele?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "I don't know, Early."
• (Brad Pitt) "Well, Adele, it's for saving your f***ing life back there. god****. You were this close, momma, from spending the night in the county morgue."
• (Michelle Forbes) "He wasn't going to shoot her, you murdering son of a bitch."
• (David Duchovny) "Stop it, Carrie."
• (Michelle Forbes) "What are you f***ing insane?"
• (David Duchovny) "Shut up."
• (Michelle Forbes) "He's a monster."
• (David Duchovny) "Shut up, Carrie."

• (Brad Pitt) "Not even a simple thank you?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "Thank you, Early."
• (Brad Pitt) "Thank you for what Adele?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "I don't know, Early."
• (Brad Pitt) "Well, Adele it was for saving your f***ing life back there. God dang, honey. You were about this close"
• (Brad Pitt) "to spending the night in the county morgue."
• (Michelle Forbes) "He wasn't going to shoot her, you murdering son of a bitch."
• (David Duchovny) "Stop it, Carrie."
• (Michelle Forbes) "Are you f***ing insane?"
• (David Duchovny) "Shut up."
• (Michelle Forbes) "God, why are you so f***ing blind, Brian? He's a murderer for crying out loud."
• (David Duchovny) "Just shut up."
• (Brad Pitt) "god**** bunch of loons."

• (Brad Pitt) "Smells like butt."

• (Brad Pitt) "Adele. Where you at?"
• (Brad Pitt) "Aw, s***."
• (Brett Rice) "She's not here. You know, you're supposed to notify me Early, when you lose your job. I stopped by the mirror factory today -- you left quite a mess back there."
• (Brad Pitt) "Yeah -- well, that wasn't my fault. Besides, it's dangerous, and they treat me like s***."
• (Brett Rice) "Aw -- nobody ever has treated you right, have they Early?"

• (Waitress) "Um sir, we don't have a liquor license here, so I'm afraid you're going to have to --"
• (Brad Pitt) "Oh that's okay, I've got plenty more of this where it come from."

• (Brad Pitt) "Do you remember them doors? Them doors I was talkin' 'bout Bri?"
• (Brad Pitt) "I think I got me a couple of them, found me a couple of them in Kentucky. Hell, I wasn't even lookin' for the first one. I was just on the side of the road, swingin' my sickle, I turn around and there's this door, this big old door and lights comin' out blindin' me, real gold and I'm thinkin': 'This can't be, this can't be.' So I close my eyes and I count one, I count two, I count three I count four-five and I open my eyes -- and it wasn't there. Haaa --"

• (Brad Pitt) "Whoa."
• (David Duchovny) "Wow, you were in there for awhile."
• (Brad Pitt) "Yeah. I took a dump."
• (Brad Pitt) "I don't think you wanna go in there though. It's wall to wall stink."
• (David Duchovny) "I just need to wash my hands."
• (Brad Pitt) "Ain't got no sink."
• (David Duchovny) "No sink?"
• (Brad Pitt) "Yeah. It's the damnedest thing I've ever seen."
• (Gas Station Attendant) "$28.35"
• (Michelle Forbes) "Talk to him."
• (Brad Pitt) "How much?"
• (Gas Station Attendant) "$28.35"
• (Brad Pitt) "Hope I got that."
• (Brad Pitt) "Call it an even $30."
• (Gas Station Attendant) "Thank you."
• (Brad Pitt) "How about I drive, bud?"
• (David Duchovny) "Sure."
• (Brad Pitt) "Mama. You get in the back."

• (Brad Pitt) "Mama -- sing us a song."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Ahm --"
• (Juliette Lewis) "I -- wish -- Carrie was happy."
• (Juliette Lewis) "I -- wish -- she would smile."

• (Brad Pitt) "Hey, if you switched two letters in your name it'd spell, um -- brain."

David Duchovny as Brian Kessler

• (David Duchovny) "I remember once going on a school trip to the top of the Empire State Building. When I looked down at the crowds of people on the street they looked like ants. I pulled out a penny and some of us started talking about what would happen if I dropped it from up there and it landed on someone's head. Of course I never crossed that line and actually dropped the penny. I don't think Early Grayce even knew there was a line to cross."

• (David Duchovny) "Early lived in the moment. He did whatever he wanted whenever he wanted. I don't know if I was fascinated or frightened by him."

• (David Duchovny) "Early seemed harmless. Primitive, but harmless. Of course the fact of the matter was he had killed his landlord less than an hour before we met him. He was even wearing the guy's ring. Who knows what he did with the finger?"

• (David Duchovny) "Does it make you feel good?"
• (David Duchovny) "Powerful?"
• (David Duchovny) "Superior?"

• (David Duchovny) "What was that?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "Nothing, Brian. It was just the thunder."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Oh my God."
• (David Duchovny) "Hey, Early, what the f*** are you doing? We talked about this."
• (Brad Pitt) "Oh, Brian. You gonna like this one. Get in. Big fella you riding shotgun. Adele, you drive."
• (David Duchovny) "What's going on? What are you doing?"
• (Brad Pitt) "Come on bud, let's go. Get us out of here mama."
• (David Duchovny) "What happened back there?"
• (Michelle Forbes) "Oh my God. He shot him. He shot him in the head."
• (David Duchovny) "Who shot who in the head?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "No, he didn't Carrie."
• (Brad Pitt) "Everybody just shut up. god****, bitch, quit squawking."
• (Brad Pitt) "Nothing's changed. I'm gonna get you there, safe, to California."
• (Brad Pitt) "That is, if Adele don't kill us with her driving first."

• (David Duchovny) "I'd always wanted to be a writer, but there's a big difference between writing a magazine article and writing a book. I know I wrote a magazine article. Everything I ever wanted to know about serial killers fit nicely on those four pages. The article got me a book deal with a little cash up front, but between the rent and the convertible the advance was gone. I owed a book and I was stuck. What little I knew about seial killers I learned in a university library. The only thing I knew for certain was that people didn't kill each other in libraries."

• (David Duchovny) "Early seemed harmless. Primitive, but harmless. Of course, the fact of the matter was that he'd killed his landlord less than an hour before we met him. He was even wearing the guy's ring. Who knows what he did with the finger."

• (David Duchovny) "When you dream there are no rules. People can fly. Anything can happen. Sometimes there's a moment as you're waking and you become aware of the real world around you, but you are still dreaming. You may think you can fly but you better not try."

• (David Duchovny) "The answer is primitive psychosis. Not the electric chair."
• (Unnamed) "Yeah, that's great Brian. Unless it's your mother's head they find in the freezer."
• (David Duchovny) "Yeah, but executing the killer would not bring my mother back now would it?"
• (Michelle Forbes) "Thank God."

• (David Duchovny) "What the hell did I know about California? For some people it was still a place of hopes and dreams, a chance to start over. The idea was if you could get there everything would be okay, and if it wasn't okay there, well, it probably wasn't going to be okay anywhere."

• (David Duchovny) "You know, I didn't know this about you, I didn't know you were so prejudice."
• (Michelle Forbes) "Oh please, because when someone takes of their shoe and scratches their foot while I'm eating and you call me prejudice?"
• (David Duchovny) "He can't help the way he was raised. I kinda feel sorry for him."
• (Michelle Forbes) "You feel sorry for him. That's so sweet. You obviously didn't get a whiff of that sock."
• (David Duchovny) "Bitch, bitch, bitch."

Juliette Lewis as Adele Corners

• (Juliette Lewis) "Know what, Brian? One night when we was stayin' up late we was talkin' 'bout how much bad luck he must have comin' from all those mirrors he broke, and I swear we came to 449 years it would take for him to work it all off, and he'd have to; after he died; he's gonna have to keep comin' back to earth over and over and over again."
• (Michelle Forbes) "Karma."
• (Juliette Lewis) "What?"
• (Michelle Forbes) "Karma. You know, when you do something bad to someone and fate pays you back by something bad happening to you."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Is that French?"

• (Juliette Lewis) "Do you want your picture taken?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "Come on."
• (Brad Pitt) "He was breathing when I walked out of there."
• (Juliette Lewis) "See, Carrie it's okay. He didn't kill him."
• (Brad Pitt) "Ain't we getting close to the next murder site?"
• (David Duchovny) "Forget about it. It doesn't matter anymore."
• (Brad Pitt) "The hell it don't."
• (Brad Pitt) "Where's that map?"
• (Brad Pitt) "Someday, me and Adele, will be walking along and see your book in a bookshop window. We gonna buy it and put it right on our coffee table. Ain't that right mama?"

• (Juliette Lewis) "You know, I used to smoke before I met Early. But he broke me of that."
• (Michelle Forbes) "Broke you?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "Oh. Yeah. Cos Early don't think women should smoke or drink or cuss. So you know what I do? I spell all my cuss words."

• (Juliette Lewis) "Hi -- Guess who this is -- It's me, Adele. Um, I know I'm probably not supposed to be talkin' on the tape recorder, but um, I just wanted to say thank you for taking me and Early with you on your trip, cuz me and Early is havin' a really good time. And um, I just hope when we get to California, that you guys don't forget all about us. Cuz friends are important, and well, you're the only friends we got. Bye."

• (Juliette Lewis) "You have such beautiful cactuses ma'am. I just love them. My mama had a cactus garden, and I had this baby cactus, and I was gonna plant it --"
• (David Duchovny) "You gotta talk to Adele. She looks up to you. She'll listen."
• (Michelle Forbes) "I tried talking to her at the mine. It didn't work."
• (David Duchovny) "Then try again."
• (Brad Pitt) "Hey Bri"
• (Brad Pitt) "you ever stop and think"
• (Brad Pitt) "that if you switched two letters in your name"
• (Brad Pitt) "you'd spell "brain"?"
• (Brad Pitt) "Boy, you got a problem."
• (Brad Pitt) "What's wrong with grandma?"
• (Brad Pitt) "Where's your husband?"
• (Sierra Pecheur) "I'm a widow."
• (Brad Pitt) "Yeah?"

• (Juliette Lewis) "Ohhhh nooooo, Early."

• (Juliette Lewis) "Will you tell me more about California?"
• (Brad Pitt) "Yeah, I guess so. Let's see. One thing, people think faster out there on the account of all that warm weather. Cold weather makes people stupid. That's a fact."
• (Juliette Lewis) "I guess that explains why there's so many stupid people around here."
• (Brad Pitt) "It sure does. You know what else? You never have to buy no fruit on account it's all on the trees everywhere you turn. And they ain't got no speed limits. I hear your first month's rent is free, state law. So I'm thinking till we get settled we'll just move around from month to month. How will that be with you, momma?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "What are we going to do out there, Early?"
• (Brad Pitt) "By God the first thing we're going to do is get us. a couple of six-packs of Lucky Lager and we're going to climb up to that famous Hollywood sign. We're going to howl at the moon, god**** it."
• (Brad Pitt) "Yeah, just like that."
• (Juliette Lewis) "I heard once that there ain't nothing on that old moon except some little golf balls the astronauts left behind."
• (Brad Pitt) "Nah, that ain't right. That's bulls***. The government be sending people there all the time. Just don't want us to know about it."

• (Juliette Lewis) "My God, Carrie. If Early ever saw me in a picture like that I'd be black-and-blue for a week."
• (Michelle Forbes) "You shouldn't let him do that to you."
• (Juliette Lewis) "You think Early's mean to me? Well, he's not. He may punish me once in a while, but he's not mean. Um, when I was 13 there was these three boys and they raped me in the back of this truck. They hurt me sob bad that I was in the hospital for, like, four months. And I feel safe with Early cos most of the time he treats me really nice. I know that he'd never. He would never let anything like that ever happen to me again."

Michelle Forbes as Carrie Laughlin

• (Michelle Forbes) "Oh, God. Please don't let them be as boring as Brian's friends. Anything but that."

• (Michelle Forbes) "Oh Brian, you've got to be kidding me. Look at them. They look like Okies."
• (Juliette Lewis) "Oh Jesus, Early, they look kinda weird."
• (Michelle Forbes) "They look like they don't have five bucks between them."

• (Michelle Forbes) "He hits you?"
• (Juliette Lewis) "Oh, only when I deserve it."

• (Michelle Forbes) "Too graphic. Too overt. Not suitable for mass consumption."

• (Michelle Forbes) "Did you happen to know that he was in jail?"
• (David Duchovny) "Yeah, for stealing a car."
• (Michelle Forbes) "Oh, really. Is that what he told you? He told her it was for carrying a gun. Brian, it could be for murder for all we know."
• (David Duchovny) "Would you stop being so f***ing melodramatic."

• (Michelle Forbes) "He beats her, you know."
• (David Duchovny) "How do you know that?"
• (Michelle Forbes) "Because she told me, that's how I know that."

Brett Rice as Parole Officer

• (Brett Rice) "What are you talking about? You know you can't leave the state."
• (Brad Pitt) "Just a thought."
• (Brett Rice) "What you CAN do is get a job. Be at this address at 3 o'clock."
• (Brad Pitt) "What for?"
• (Brett Rice) "Janitor's job."
• (Brad Pitt) "Well, I don't wanna be no janitor."
• (Brett Rice) "I don't give two s***s what YOU want. All I'm saying is you better be there or you'll be having dinner with the sheriff."
• (Brett Rice) "You understand me, boy?"
• (Brad Pitt) "I understand you need to take care of that cough. Put a paper bag over your head and breathe deep. Works every time -- peg-armed piece of s***."

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