Laryngitis (Glee) Quotes

Laryngitis (Glee) is a TV program that debuted in 1970 . Laryngitis completed its run in 1970.

It features "The Climb (Miley Cyrus song)" in charge of musical score.

Laryngitis (Glee) Quotes

• (Noah 'Puck' Puckerman) "What was that?"
• (Jacob Ben Israel) "Whatever I did, I'm -- I'm sorry. Here, take my lunch money as an apology."
• (Noah 'Puck' Puckerman) "Put that away. Why didn't you look at me when I walked by?"
• (Jacob Ben Israel) "Well, the Tweetosphere says you're dating Mercedes Jones. She's one of the most popular girls in school. Your cool-o-meter is off the charts. Which means most of us are terrified of you again. Some of the guys who threw you in the dumpster actually tranferred today out of fear of retaliation."
• (Noah 'Puck' Puckerman) "I didn't say you could smile. Give me that lunch money."

• (Will Schuester) "I am very disappointed in you guys."
• (Finn Hudson) "Can't believe you narced on us."
• (Rachel Berry) "Don't get mad at me for exposing your laziness. I'm tired of carrying all of your weight. Regionals is in a month, guys."
• (Will Schuester) "I'm just trying to understand what's going on here. Finn, why did you stop singing?"
• (Finn Hudson) "'Cause you started giving all the male leads to Jesse. It kind of shook my confidence, you know?"
• (Santana Lopez) "Oh, what difference does it make? Everyone knows that my job here is to look hot."
• (Quinn Fabray) "My baby hormones are making me moody."
• (Brittany S. Pierce) "There are so many lyrics."
• (Will Schuester) "Okay, a chain is only as strong as its weakest link. A glee club is about a myriad of voices coming together as one. All right? This ends now."

• (Mercedes Jones) "Look, Quinn, I could never see myself being into a guy like Puck, especially since he's your baby's daddy, but -- something just happened between us."
• (Quinn Fabray) "I say -- go for it."
• (Mercedes Jones) "What?"
• (Quinn Fabray) "Look -- I screwed up by letting Puck get me pregnant. He's an idiot, and his mother won't let me eat bacon. I'm stuck living with him right now, but at least, if you guys are dating, I won't have to spend so much time listening to his insane theories on how "Super Mario Brothers" changed civilization."

• (Brittany S. Pierce) "Hey, Kurt. That song was hot."
• (Kurt Hummel) "Oh."
• (Kurt Hummel) "Merci."
• (Brittany S. Pierce) "So, you're pretty much the only guy in this school I haven't made out with, because I thought you were capital "G" gay. But now that you're not, having a perfect record would mean a lot to me. So let me know if you want to tap this."

• (Kurt Hummel) "Our assignment for Glee Club is to find a song that reflects our voice."
• (Sue Sylvester) "Yeah, you know what? I checked out of this conversation about a minute back. So, uh, good luck with your troubles, and I'm gonna make it a habit not to stop and talk to students, 'cause this has been a colossal waste of my time."

• (Rachel Berry) "Here are the glee club members who are not pulling their weight."
• (Will Schuester) "This is half the club."

• (Mercedes Jones) "What are they doing here?"
• (Noah 'Puck' Puckerman) "I invited my brothers from the jazz band and their righteous horns to help me out with my song. Since I shaved my mohawk, I started seeing things differently. Last week, I joined a black church, and I recently downloaded every song Sammy Davis Jr. ever recorded on iTunes. He was a black Jew, you know. And my inspiration. So, without further ado, I give you one of Sammy's biggest hits."

• (Burt Hummel) "Whoa. Am I interrupting something?"
• (Kurt Hummel) "You sure are."
• (Burt Hummel) "Okay, I'm confused. I came home to find this note on your doorknob: "Do not enter under any circumstances, I'm making out with a girl." I just thought it was the start of one of your murder mystery dinners."
• (Kurt Hummel) "Dad, I really need you to accept my privacy. Brittany and I were just, uh, having sexual relations."
• (Burt Hummel) "Hi."
• (Burt Hummel) "Kurt, uh -- I've been sorta dealing for months with you being gay and everything, and now you're telling me that's not the case?"
• (Kurt Hummel) "Dad, you and I have more in common than I would have thought. The flannel, the Mellencamp -- the ladies."
• (Burt Hummel) "Okay, well -- you're free to be whoever you are, okay? You just let me know when you make up your mind, I'm gonna do the best I can. But I'm good either way."
• (Burt Hummel) "Nice to meet you. You kids be careful, all right? And you gotta respect her, all right? If things get serious, use protection."
• (Brittany S. Pierce) "Does he mean like a burglar alarm?"

• (Noah 'Puck' Puckerman) "I'm human garbage. I should just lie here until the truck comes and let it crush me to death. What's the point of living when I suck so bad?"
• (Noah 'Puck' Puckerman) "Wait a second -- That black chick from Glee Club used to suck, and now she's all kinds of popular. If she can straighten herself out, I certainly can. But how? I'm not becoming a cheerio. Wait -- I don't need to be a cheerleader, I just need to date one. Get ready, black girl from Glee Club whose name I can't remember right now -- The Puckster's about to make you his."

• (Finn Hudson) "Are you, like, sleepwalking?"
• (Rachel Berry) "You have to be able to sleep to sleepwalk. I am on my third day of antibiotics, and I am not getting any better, which means I'm going to have to have that surgery, which means my life is over."
• (Finn Hudson) "Don't you think you're being a little dramatic, I mean, even for you?"

• (Rachel Berry) "What if he says I'll never sing again? I mean, who am I without my voice? I-I-I -- I'm just this spoiled, annoying only child --"
• (Finn Hudson) "Don't say that. There's, like, so many awesome things about you."
• (Rachel Berry) "Like?"
• (Finn Hudson) "Look, he's not gonna say you'll never sing again."
• (Dr. Gidwani) "Bad news, Rachel. You'll probably never sing again."
• (Dr. Gidwani) "I'm kidding. You have severe tonsillitis, which has resulted in an inner ear infection. From the looks of things, it's not the first time. You should have had them out years ago."

• (Sue Sylvester) "You know, there's only one person in the world who can tell you what you are."
• (Kurt Hummel) "Me."
• (Sue Sylvester) "No. Me. Sue Sylvester. And she hasn't quite made up her mind about you."

• (Noah 'Puck' Puckerman) "Hey, sugar. Listen. I got a proposition to make. I did some research. Blacks and Jews have a history of sticking up for each other. And Wikipedia says that King Martin Luther loved the Jews."
• (Mercedes Jones) "Okay, you just said, like, ten offensive things."
• (Noah 'Puck' Puckerman) "My point is you're popular now. And I got to be honest -- I need to spice up my image a little. We should join forces. It wouldn't take much. Just a little light making out. And I like a girl with curves. You got to admit, I'm easy on the eyes."
• (Mercedes Jones) "Baby, I just am not attracted to you. Plus, I know what you do the girls you date. You knock them up, and then you hang them out to dry."
• (Noah 'Puck' Puckerman) "Quinn and I weren't dating. She was dating someone else. We just did the nasty. And she understood you can't tie me down. I'm a sex shark. If I stop moving, I die."
• (Mercedes Jones) "Okay, I'm gonna ask you to stop, because I'm starting to get embarrassed for you."

• (Mercedes Jones) "Puck, what the hell is going on here?"
• (Noah 'Puck' Puckerman) "Just a little payback. You hear that? That's the sound of order being restored."
• (Mercedes Jones) "No man of mine is gonna be pulling stuff like this."
• (Noah 'Puck' Puckerman) "Babe, this is what we do. Look at 'em. They need this. Without the fear of a good dumpster toss, it'd be chaos up in this place. Look, you don't need to like it, but you need to accept it: this is the way things are. 'Cause now, we're part of the system. We're at the top of the heap."
• (Noah 'Puck' Puckerman) "Who's next?"

• (Burt Hummel) "Hey, Kurt."
• (Kurt Hummel) "Dad? What are you doing here? Is everything okay?"
• (Burt Hummel) "Oh, I'm here to pick up Finn. I got a pair of tickets to the Reds game, and Carole said that Finn's never been to a major league game. I mean, it's Cincinnati, so it's barely the major leagues, but still."
• (Kurt Hummel) "And why wasn't I invited?"
• (Burt Hummel) "Are you kidding me? Every time I sit down to watch a game, you start in on the fact that all the players are wearing stirrup pants."
• (Kurt Hummel) "Because there's never an excuse for stirrup pants."

• (Kurt Hummel) "Is there something wrong, Mr. Schue?"
• (Will Schuester) "I don't really think you got the point of the assignment. This was about finding a song that expresses who you are. That song really didn't sound like you."
• (Kurt Hummel) "Well, I'm sorry if I didn't live up to your expectations."
• (Will Schuester) "No, no. This group needs you to be you, Kurt. You can literally do things that no one else can."
• (Kurt Hummel) "I'm not a box. There are more than four sides to me."
• (Will Schuester) "Don't lose track of who you are just because it might be easier to be somebody else."

• (Sean Fretthold) "Finn with you?"
• (Rachel Berry) "No, I came by myself. Is that okay?"
• (Sean Fretthold) "Yeah."
• (Rachel Berry) "I, um -- I just wanted to say thank you, and for showing me that just because I'm not good at anything other than singing doesn't mean I'm not any good if I can't sing. That sounded like a really bad greeting card."
• (Sean Fretthold) "No, it was cool."
• (Rachel Berry) "Well, anyways, I -- I just thought I could maybe return the favor. I thought I could give you singing lessons. It sort of seemed like an area of interest for you. I'll -- I'll come by, like, once a week or something, and we could just see how it goes? I've -- I've helped almost everyone in our glee club, some by brute force, but --"
• (Sean Fretthold) "So your voice came back."
• (Rachel Berry) "Turns out that a heroic dose of antibotics and a mysterious blend of herbal remedies and a vow of silence is all it takes to cure tonsilitis, so -- I'll probably have to have my tonsils taken out eventually, but, um, I'm -- I'm not scared anymore."

• (Kurt Hummel) "Your lip gloss tastes like root beet. It's weird. Can I ask you something? What do boys' lips taste like?"
• (Brittany S. Pierce) "Usually dip. Sometimes they taste like burgers. Or my armpits. Kissing my armpits is a really big turn-on for me."

• (Will Schuester) "Wait, what are these?"
• (Rachel Berry) "My vitamin supplements. I'm taking them three times a day. I'm exhausted. I even felt a tickle in the back of my throat, and I never get sick."
• (Will Schuester) "I just don't understand why you're so tired all of a sudden."
• (Rachel Berry) "Because every song I sing in here is a solo. As you know, I have perfect pitch, which also means I have a very sensitive ear. None of them were singing. I knew I needed proof, so I had a little talk with Lauren Zizes, president of the AV Club."

• (Burt Hummel) "Hey, Kurt, you want to speak to me?"
• (Kurt Hummel) "Hey, dad, yeah. I was just, uh, working on my glee club assignment. "Pink Houses" by John Mellencamp."
• (Burt Hummel) "Oh. Really? I didn't think that was in your wheelhouse."
• (Kurt Hummel) "Yeah, I think it's really brave for a Midwesterner like himself to, uh, write a song about such bold interior design."
• (Burt Hummel) "You know, that's not what the song's about."
• (Kurt Hummel) "Really?"
• (Burt Hummel) "No, it's about how the '80s were a tough time for a lot of people and how the American Dream isn't all it's cracked up to be."
• (Kurt Hummel) "Hmm. Fascinating. Hey, why don't we go grab a couple burgers and, uh, you can tell me more about it?"
• (Burt Hummel) "Sure. But I gotta be honest, that's pretty much what every Mellencamp song is about. But you know what? I'll get my coat. Anything to help you out."

• (Burt Hummel) "That was some serious singing, kid."
• (Kurt Hummel) "That was "Rose's Turn"."
• (Burt Hummel) "I could get into that, maybe."
• (Kurt Hummel) "What happened to the hoagies?"
• (Burt Hummel) "Ah, blew it off. You know, too much cholesterol."
• (Kurt Hummel) "I bet Finn was disappointed."
• (Burt Hummel) "He understood, uh -- once I told him how bent out of shape I thought you were."
• (Kurt Hummel) "Me? I'm fine."
• (Burt Hummel) "Kurt, I'm dumb, but I'm not stupid. And I have no idea what that song was about, but "fine" don't sing like you just sung."

• (Rachel Berry) "I'm like Tinkerbell, Finn, I need applause to live."

• (Lauren Zizes) "Bug the choir room? I'm almost offended by the simplicity of the request."
• (Rachel Berry) "Just tell me you can do it, Zizes. The microphones would have to be hidden."
• (Lauren Zizes) "Who's this guy? Who's this guy?"
• (Lauren Zizes) "It'll cost you two boxes of Mallomars for me and Snickers bars for my workers. Take it or leave it, Berry."

• (Sue Sylvester) "Hey, ladyface. I noticed you weren't at Cheerios practice yesterday, and I don't look kindly on absenteeism."

• (Sue Sylvester) "So you like show tunes. It doesn't mean you're gay. It means you're awful."

• (Will Schuester) "All right, guys, let's get things started."
• (Rachel Berry) "As I was first on the sign-up sheet, I'll kick things off."
• (Will Schuester) "Okay."
• (Rachel Berry) "I have chosen Miley Cyrus' "The Climb", because it's about overcoming obstacles and beating the odds. In my case, the obstacle is you; my lackluster teammates who refuse to carry their own weight."

• (Brittany S. Pierce) "Your hands are really soft."
• (Kurt Hummel) "My secret? Duck fat."
• (Kurt Hummel) "Hey, guys. Just holding hands with Brittany."
• (Brittany S. Pierce) "Seriously, they feel like a baby. Now what I know what it's like to date a baby."

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