Law and Order Quotes

Law & Order is a Police procedural; Legal drama that was first aired in 1990 on NBC. Law &amp ended its run in 2010.

Law & Order was on for 20 seasons and 456 episodes. It features Lorenzo Carcaterra, Aaron Zelman, Nick Santora, Lois Johnson, Greg Plageman, and Christopher Ambrose as producer, and Mike Post as theme composer. Law & Order is executive produced by Dick Wolf, Rene Balcer, Ed Sherin, Michael S. Chernuchin, Walon Green, Barry Schindel, William M. Finkelstein, Arthur Penn, Peter Jankowski, Matthew Penn, Nicholas Wootton, and Fred Berner. Law & Order is created by Dick Wolf.

Law & Order is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Law & Order is 40-48 minutes long. Law & Order is produced by Dick Wolf; Universal Television and distributed by NBCUniversal Television Distribution.

Law & Order Quotes

• (Emil Skoda) "That's just a load of rehearsed crap."

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "Ed, I sold my plantation over a century ago."

• (Capt. Donald Cragen) "What'd he say?"
• (Det. Mike Logan) "He told us to go to hell"
• (Capt. Donald Cragen) "Well, at least he's got a way with words."

• (DA Branch) "Well, I guess it beats dousing yourself in rum and lighting up a Cohiba."

• (Det. Rey Curtis) "When I filled out my ethnicity, I had to put "Other" --"

• (Jack McCoy) "Sometimes you have to make deals with the devil."
• (Jamie Ross) "Just make sure you don't get your eyebrows singed."

• (ADA Jack McCoy) "There comes a time in everyone's political career when you have to expect a couple over easy in the kisser."

• (Jack McCoy) "You son of a bitch. You played me."

• (Det. Mike Logan) "Listen -- Somebody blew your boyfriend's brains out with a 48, okay?"

• (Capt. Donald Cragen) "Freakin'"

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "Boy, I'd hate for somebody to trace me by what I read."
• (Det. Rey Curtis) "You read, Lennie?"

• (Adam Schiff) "Always think you have a smoking gun, till the smoke blows in your face."

• (EADA Jack McCoy) "You can re-write the law when you're appointed to the Supreme Court."
• (D.A. Arthur Branch) "God willing."

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "Just like the Bates Hotel. They check in but they never check out."

• (Capt. Donald Cragen) "WHAT?"

• (Ben Stone) "The jury should look like society. People that represent the victim as well as the defendant"

• (ADA Jack McCoy) "If that's the way you feel, Danielle, move to suppress."
• (Danielle Melnick) "Right. Judge Logan's gonna rule FISA violates the Fourth Amendment. How many beers have you had?"

• (Det. Mike Logan) "You have the right to remain silent."
• (Dorian 'Silky' Ford) "Big surprise. Shut up, man."

• (Det. Mike Logan) "Praise the Lord, pass the ammunition."

• (Det. Rey Curtis) "You're a Catholic."
• (Jack McCoy) "Not at work. Sorry."

• (Jack McCoy) "The last time I checked, "Stupid" isn't a defense for murder."

• (Det. Mike Logan) "Put the burrito down, señor."

• (ADA Jack McCoy) "Sometimes Lennie Briscoe doesn't hit it out of the park."

• (Ben Stone) "Unless the victim qualifies for sainthood, we shouldn't prosecute? Lyndon Johnson tried governing by opinion polls -- It didn't work."

• (D.A. Arthur Branch) "Sometimes the good you do won't do you any good."

• (Sergeant Max Greevey) "Patient is dead. But don't worry, the doctor is fine."

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "Love; a dangerous disease instantly cured by marriage."

• (Detective Lennie Briscoe) "We had a deal, you son of a bitch."

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) ""Oh hello Mrs. Russell, you daughter was raped and shot in the head". You want me to do it?"

• (Adam Schiff) "A motive pulled straight from the tabloids. And what about means and opportunity? Are you getting that from comic books?"

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "You've heard of the Seven Rings of Saturn? These are the Two Rings of Riker's."

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "I don't like to be second guessed."
• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "I've been walking on eggshells the whole time he's been here."

• (Unnamed) "Life is beautiful. All God's children are innocent."

• (Lt. Anita Van Buren) "Do you believe him?"
• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "I believe on a good day he couldn't hit his ass with both hands."

• (Medical Examiner Elizabeth Rodgers) "I got another body coming in. Guy took a javelin to the chest."
• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "Why are you still in this line of work?"
• (Medical Examiner Elizabeth Rodgers) "Free javelins."

• (ADA Claire Kincaid) "Where's our notice?"
• (Ben Stone) "The client's dog ate it."

• (Jack McCoy) "You played me, you son of a bitch."

• (Det. Ed Green) "Rock, paper, scissors, gun."

• (Adam Schiff) "I wouldn't count your chickens. Your omelet just hit the fan."

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "We got a hit on the fake fur."
• (Det. Rey Curtis) "Yeah, you'll never guess what they make them out of."
• (Lt. Anita Van Buren) "Recycled soda bottles. What else did you find out?"

• (Adam Schiff) "You do what you have to do, you're still welcome to my scotch."

• (Jack McCoy) "Your grief might seem a little more real had you not just admitted you cut off your wife's head."

• (Abbie Carmichael) "Gentleman, if we can just lower the amount of testosterone --"

• (Ben Stone) "Although justice must be tempered with mercy, it must still maintain a sense of retribution."

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "I specifically asked for him to be put on suicide watch. Apparently here at Riker's that mean that they watch you commit suicide."

• (Adam Schiff) "A first-year law student could punch more holes in your case than Con Ed has in Third Avenue."

• (Det. Mike Logan) "Interviewing suspect: When is your birthday?"
• (Unnamed) "March 20."
• (Det. Mike Logan) "What year?"
• (Unnamed) "Every year. I have a birthday every year."

• (Cookie Molina) "I can see the future."
• (Sergeant Max Greevey) "Oh yeah?"
• (Cookie Molina) "You are going to read me my rights."

• (Lt. Anita Van Buren) "It wasn't the eighteen floors from the window to the street that killed her, it was the sudden stop."

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "I'm trying to decide what to arrest you for; obstruction of justice, harboring a fugitive or just being a general pain in the ass."

• (Adam Schiff) "Flipped a coin in my head. Came up tails. Talk to the boy."

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) ""The girls next door, the girls you've always dreamed about. Behind closed doors for the first time.""
• (Det. Mike Logan) "For the LAST time."

• (Jack McCoy) "Take it back."
• (ADA Claire Kincaid) "You can't forgive anyone, can you?"
• (Jack McCoy) "Nope. Besides, that was bourbon; I'm drinking scotch."

• (Medical Examiner Elizabeth Rodgers) "Rodgers."
• (Medical Examiner Elizabeth Rodgers) "Your lieutenant."
• (Det. Ed Green) "What's that on the receiver? Brains?"
• (Medical Examiner Elizabeth Rodgers) "Egg salad, maybe."
• (Det. Ed Green) "You got another phone?"

• (A.D.A. Paul Robinette) "Could be he's lucky."
• (Capt. Donald Cragen) "Could be next week I'll be doing shampoo commercials."

• (Jack McCoy) "Let 'em marry. Why shouldn't they be as miserable as the rest of us?"

• (Lt. Anita Van Buren) "I'd like it if you two became real partners."
• (Detective Lennie Briscoe) "And I'd like it if my ex-wives got partners. No more alimony."

• (Det. Ed Green) "That's good, now radiate your ass up against the wall."

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "I got one word for you, Rey; plastics."

• (Det. Ed Green) "Just give up the car. Man, when are people gonna realize it isn't worth your life?"
• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "Spoken like somebody who's never owned a Jag."

• (Det. Lennie Briscoe) "Even though you are a taxpayer, you know, we don't actually work for you personally."

• (Lt. Anita Van Buren) "I'd better go. I'm late for my daily spanking at One Police Plaza."

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