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Machete (2010 film) Quotes

Machete (2010 film) is a TV show that first aired in 1970 . Machete stopped airing in 1970.

It features Robert Rodriguez as producer, Chingon (band) in charge of musical score, and Jimmy Lindsey as head of cinematography.

Machete (2010 film) is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Machete (2010 film) is 105 minutes long. Machete (2010 film) is distributed by 20th Century Fox.

The cast includes: Danny Trejo as Machete, Jeff Fahey as Booth, Tom Savini as Osiris Ampanpour, Jessica Alba as Sartana, Cheech Marin as Padre Benito del Toro, Michelle Rodriguez as Luz, Shea Whigham as Sniper, Felix Sabates as Doc Felix, Robert De Niro as Senator McLaughlin, Lindsay Lohan as April Booth, and Daryl Sabara as Julio.

Machete (2010 film) Quotes

Cheech Marin as Padre Benito del Toro

  • (Cheech Marin) "Cuban?"
  • (Danny Trejo) "Mexican."
  • (Cheech Marin) "It's not safe for you to be here."
  • (Danny Trejo) "I'm not looking for "safe"."
  • (Cheech Marin) "No, I mean it's not safe for me for you to be here."
  • (Cheech Marin) "I absolve you of all your sins. Now, get the f*** out."
  • (Henchman) "Please father -- have mercy."
  • (Cheech Marin) "God has mercy. I don't."

Jessica Alba as Sartana

  • (Jessica Alba) "I thought Machete don't text."
  • (Danny Trejo) "Machete improvises."
  • (Jessica Alba) "I called in a few favors. Look at this. Got you all the right papers. You can start over now, be a real person."
  • (Danny Trejo) "Why do I want to be a real person when I'm already a myth?"
  • (Jessica Alba) "Well, there's the law and there's what's right. I'm gonna do what's right."
  • (Jessica Alba) "Where will you go?"
  • (Danny Trejo) "Everywhere."
  • (Jessica Alba) "Then I'll ride with you --"
  • (Jessica Alba) "Yes, I am a woman of the law. And there are lots of laws. But if they don't offer us justice, then they aren't laws. They are just lines drawn in the sand by men who would stand on your back for power and glory."
  • (Jessica Alba) "I started working on the night shift taking out the trash. But I worked my way up. As translator, assistant -- Now I'm Special Agent in charge of investigations."
  • (Danny Trejo) "Sounds like they still got you taking out the trash."

Robert De Niro as Senator McLaughlin

  • (Robert De Niro) "Welcome to America."
  • (Robert De Niro) "Well, I wanna thank y'all for coming out today, and I wanna thank my supporters from the bottom of my heart. Because we have been tested; tested by fire. Our border has been put to the test, and let me tell you: we have failed that test. The aliens, the infiltrators, the outsiders, they come right across by light of day or dark of night. They'll bleed us, they're parasites. They'll bleed us until we as a city, a county, a state, a nation are all bled out. Make no mistake: we are at war. Every time an illegal dances across our border it is an act of aggression against this sovereign state, an overt act of terrorism. Everywhere I go in this state people are talking about change. I say "why change"? This is a great state founded on the principles of liberty, I don't wanna change that. Our rightful citizens are hardworking Americans who earn their paychecks by the grit of their guts and the sweat of their brow. I don't wanna change that. "Change," that's what they want, change. Change the laws, open the doors. Red rover, red rover, let the terrorists come over. Let me tell you what change that'll bring: 68 cents. The jingle-jangle of pennies in your pocket because the scavengers, the leeches, the parasites are walking away with your money, while you're left with the change. So, I wanna say one more thing: who you gonna vote for?"
  • (Robert De Niro) "Sister. Please -- I've done wrong. I've lived a hateful life. I'm not even from around here. I hate Texas. I hate the heat. Give me my last rites."
  • (Lindsay Lohan) "In the name of my father --"
  • (Robert De Niro) "My -- my father? April?"
  • (Lindsay Lohan) "I forgot the rest."

Daryl Sabara as Julio

  • (Daryl Sabara) "We just wanna help, bro."
  • (Danny Trejo) "I don't need you help."
  • (Daryl Sabara) "If not us, then who?"

Lindsay Lohan as April Booth

  • (Lindsay Lohan) "Do you even know how many hits I get on my website?"
  • (Jeff Fahey) "You have a website? She has a website? Did you know about this?"
  • (Lindsay Lohan) "I know all about what the online public wants. And they want me. All of me."
  • (Jeff Fahey) "That does it. I'm sending you to a convent."

Danny Trejo as Machete

  • (Danny Trejo) "Machete don't text."
  • (Danny Trejo) "Get dressed."
  • (Chica) "It's too hot for clothes."
  • (Federale Officer) "We're federal agents, not martyrs. This is suicide. She's just another kidnap victim."
  • (Federale Officer) "What makes her special? Because she's a witness against Torrez? He probably has her locked up, drugged our of her mind. We don't have to do this."
  • (Danny Trejo) "If not us, then who?"
  • (Federale Officer) "You're the boss."
  • (Danny Trejo) "No."
  • (Danny Trejo) "This is the boss."
  • (Danny Trejo) "Are you Shé?"
  • (Michelle Rodriguez) "If I were Shé, do you think I'd be operating a taco truck? Shé brings hope. Shé rights the wrongs. Unfortunately, Shé is a myth."
  • (Booth's Bodyguard #1) "Hey, hey-heh, boss. Who are you?"
  • (Danny Trejo) "The new gardener."
  • (Booth's Bodyguard #1) "The gardener."
  • (Booth's Bodyguard #1) "Just f***in' with you, cheef. It's Hungarian for I going to kill you, you little monkey. You know what, there's a big pile of s*** in the back, you can go and clean that up, all right? Make sure you do a good job."
  • (Booth's Bodyguard #1) "Make sure to wipe those boots off. Carrying s*** in the house."
  • (Booth's Bodyguard #1) "You ever noticed how you let a Mexican into your house just because he's got gardening tools? No questions asked, you just let him right in. Could have a chainsaw, you know, a machete --"

Jeff Fahey as Booth

  • (Jeff Fahey) "Tell me, where are my wife and daughter?"
  • (Danny Trejo) "With God."
  • (Jeff Fahey) "Well, I guess I won't be seeing them."
  • (Jeff Fahey) "Machete sent me a text."
  • (Tom Savini) "What did it say?"
  • (Jeff Fahey) ""You just f***ed with the wrong Mexican.""
  • (Jeff Fahey) "Where is Machete and where are my wife and daughter?"
  • (Cheech Marin) "In hell."
  • (Jeff Fahey) "Then give them my best."

Felix Sabates as Doc Felix

  • (Felix Sabates) "How's the eye?"
  • (Michelle Rodriguez) "What eye?"
  • (Felix Sabates) "Oh, you don't want to mess with that. That's a skull scraper; we use that to scrape the bones clean. And those cut through flesh just like butter."
  • (Danny Trejo) "Pass me that tank."

Michelle Rodriguez as Luz

  • (Von Jackson) "Habla inglés?"
  • (Michelle Rodriguez) "Depends on the question."

Shea Whigham as Sniper

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