Mr. Deeds Goes to Town Quotes

Mr. Deeds Goes to Town is a TV program that was first aired in 1970 . Mr. Deeds Goes to Town completed its run in 1970.

It features Frank Capra as producer, Howard Jackson (composer) in charge of musical score, and Joseph Walker (cinematographer) as head of cinematography.

Mr. Deeds Goes to Town is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Mr. Deeds Goes to Town is 115 minutes long. Mr. Deeds Goes to Town is distributed by Columbia Pictures.

The cast includes: Gary Cooper as Longfellow Deeds, H. B. Warner as Judge May, Douglass Dumbrille as John Cedar, Jean Arthur as Babe Bennett, Jean Arthur as Louise "Babe" Bennett, Ruth Donnelly as Mabel Dawson, Raymond Walburn as Walter, George Bancroft as MacWade, Lionel Stander as Cornelius Cobb, and Walter Catlett as Morrow.

Mr. Deeds Goes to Town Quotes

Gary Cooper as Longfellow Deeds

• (Gary Cooper) "Even his hands are oily."

• (Gary Cooper) "He talks about women as if they were cattle."
• (Raymond Walburn) "Every man to his taste, sir."
• (Gary Cooper) "Tell me, Walter, are all these stories I hear about my uncle true?"
• (Raymond Walburn) "Well, sir, he sometimes had as many as twenty in the house at the same time."
• (Gary Cooper) "Twenty. What did he do with them?"
• (Raymond Walburn) "That is something I was never able to find out, sir."

• (Gary Cooper) "Now, um, heh, now about the Faulkner sisters. That's kind of funny. I mean, about Mr. Cedar going all the way to Mandrake Falls to bring them here. Do you mind if I talk to them?"
• (H. B. Warner) "Not at all."
• (Gary Cooper) "Jane, who owns the house you live in?"
• (Jane Faulkner) "Why, you own it, Longfellow."
• (Amy Faulkner) "Yes, you own it."
• (Gary Cooper) "Do you pay any rent?"
• (Jane Faulkner) "No, we don't pay any rent."
• (Amy Faulkner) "Good heavens, no, we never pay rent."
• (Gary Cooper) "Are you happy there?"
• (Jane Faulkner) "Oh, yes."
• (Amy Faulkner) "Yes indeed."
• (Gary Cooper) "Now, uh, Jane, a little while ago you said I was pixilated. Do you still think so?"
• (Jane Faulkner) "Why, you've always been pixilated, Longfellow."
• (Amy Faulkner) "Always."
• (Gary Cooper) "That's fine, hm, I guess maybe I am. And now tell me something, Jane: who else in Mandrake Falls is pixilated?"
• (Jane Faulkner) "Why, everybody in Mandrake Falls is pixilated; except us."
• (Amy Faulkner) "Mm-hmm."

• (Gary Cooper) "About my playing the tuba. Seems like a lot of fuss has been made about that. If, if a man's crazy just because he plays the tuba, then somebody'd better look into it, because there are a lot of tuba players running around loose. 'Course, I don't see any harm in it. I play mine whenever I want to concentrate. That may sound funny to some people, but everybody does something silly when they're thinking. For instance, the judge here is, is an O-filler."
• (H. B. Warner) "A what?"
• (Gary Cooper) "An O-filler. You fill in all the spaces in the O's with your pencil. I was watching him."
• (Gary Cooper) "That may make you look a little crazy, Your Honor, just, just sitting around filling in O's, but I don't see anything wrong, 'cause that helps you think. Other people are doodlers."
• (H. B. Warner) ""Doodlers"?"
• (Gary Cooper) "Uh, that's a word we made up back home for people who make foolish designs on paper when they're thinking: it's called doodling. Almost everybody's a doodler; did you ever see a scratchpad in a telephone booth? People draw the most idiotic pictures when they're thinking. Uh, Dr. von Hallor here could probably think up a long name for it, because he doodles all the time."
• (Gary Cooper) "Thank you. This is a piece of paper he was scribbling on. I can't figure it out; one minute it looks like a chimpanzee, and the next minute it looks like a picture of Mr. Cedar. You look at it, Judge. Exhibit A for the defense. Looks kind of stupid, doesn't it, Your Honor? But I guess that's all right; if Dr. von Hallor has to, uh, doodle to help him think, that's his business. Everybody does something different: some people are, are ear-pullers; some are nail-biters; that, uh, Mr. Semple over there is a nose-twitcher."
• (Gary Cooper) "And the lady next to him is a knuckle-cracker."
• (Gary Cooper) "So you see, everybody does silly things to help them think. Well, I play the tuba."

• (Gary Cooper) "It's like I'm out in a big boat, and I see one fellow in a rowboat who's tired of rowing and wants a free ride, and another fellow who's drowning. Who would you expect me to rescue? Mr. Cedar; who's just tired of rowing and wants a free ride? Or those men out there who are drowning? Any ten year old child will give you the answer to that."

• (Gary Cooper) "You know the poem I told you about? It's finished. Would you like to read it? It's to you."
• (Jean Arthur) "Yes. Of course."
• (Gary Cooper) "You don't have to say anything, Mary. You can tell me tomorrow what you think."
• (Jean Arthur) "I tramped the Earth with hopeless feet / searching in vain for a glimpse of you / Then heaven thrust you at my very feet / a lovely angel, too lovely to woo / My dream has been answered, but my life's just as bleak / I'm handcuffed and speechless in your presence divine / For my heart longs to cry out. If it only could speak / I love you, my angel. Be mine. Be mine."

• (Gary Cooper) "From what I can see, no matter what system of government we have, there will always be leaders and always be followers. It's like the road out in front of my house. It's on a steep hill. Every day I watch the cars climbing up. Some go lickety-split up that hill on high, some have to shift into second, and some sputter and shake and slip back to the bottom again. Same cars, same gasoline, yet some make it and some don't. And I say the fellas who can make the hill on high should stop once in a while and help those who can't. That's all I'm trying to do with this money. Help the fellas who can't make the hill on high."

• (Gary Cooper) "There once was a man named Cobb Kept Semple away from the mob Came the turn of the tide And Semple he died And now poor Cobb is out of a job."

• (Gary Cooper) "Hand me my pants. I wrote her phone number on a piece of paper."
• (Raymond Walburn) "You have no pants, sir. You came home last night without them."
• (Gary Cooper) "I did what?"
• (Raymond Walburn) "As a matter of fact, you came home without any clothes at all. You were in your shorts. Yes, sir."
• (Gary Cooper) "Don't be silly, Walter. I couldn't walk around on the streets without any clothes. I'd be arrested."
• (Raymond Walburn) "That's what the two policemen said, sir."
• (Gary Cooper) "What two policemen?"
• (Raymond Walburn) "The ones who brought you home, sir. They said you and another gentleman kept walking up and down the street shouting "back to nature. Clothes are a blight on civilization. Back to nature.""

H. B. Warner as Judge May

• (H. B. Warner) "Mr. Deeds, there has been a great deal of damaging testimony against you. Your behavior, to say the least, has been most strange. But in the opinion of the court, you are not only sane, but you're the sanest man that ever walked into this courtroom."

Jean Arthur as Louise "Babe" Bennett

• (Jean Arthur) "That guy is either the dumbest, stupidest, most imbecilic idiot in the world, or else he's the grandest thing alive. I can't make him out."

• (Jean Arthur) "To most people, it's an awful let-down -- To most people, it's a washout."
• (Gary Cooper) "Well, that depends on what they see."
• (Jean Arthur) "Now what do you see?"
• (Gary Cooper) "Me? Oh I see a small Ohio farm boy becoming a great soldier. I see thousands of marching men. I see General Lee with a broken heart surrendering. And I can see the beginning of a new nation, like Abraham Lincoln said. And I can see that Ohio boy being inaugurated as President. Things like that can only happen in a country like America."

Douglass Dumbrille as John Cedar

• (Douglass Dumbrille) "Your Honor, what she is saying has no bearing on the case. I object."
• (H. B. Warner) "Let her speak."
• (Jean Arthur) "I know why he won't defend himself. That has a bearing on the case, hasn't it? He's been hurt, he's been hurt by everybody he met since he came here, principally by me. He's been the victim of every conniving crook in town. The newspapers pounced on him, made him a target for their feeble humor. I was smarter than the rest of them: I got closer to him, so I could laugh louder. Why shouldn't he keep quiet; every time he said anything it was twisted around to sound imbecilic. He can thank me for it. I handed the gang a grand laugh. It's a fitting climax to my sense of humor."
• (Douglass Dumbrille) "Why, Your Honor, this is preposterous."
• (Jean Arthur) "Certainly I wrote those articles. I was going to get a raise, a month's vacation. But I stopped writing them when I found out what he was all about, when I realized how real he was. He could never fit in with our distorted viewpoint, because he's honest, and sincere, and good. If that man's crazy, Your Honor, the rest of us belong in straitjackets."
• (Douglass Dumbrille) "Your Honor, this is absurd. The woman's obviously in love with him."
• (Jean Arthur) "What's that got to do with it?"
• (Douglass Dumbrille) "Well, you are in love with him, aren't you?"
• (Jean Arthur) "What's that got to do with it?"
• (Douglass Dumbrille) "You ARE, aren't you?"
• (Jean Arthur) "Yes."

• (Douglass Dumbrille) "I'm John Cedar, of the New York firm of Cedar, Cedar, Cedar and Budington."
• (Gary Cooper) "Budington must feel like an awful stranger."

• (Anderson) "Longfellow Deeds. Where does he live?"
• (Farmer) "Oh, that's what you want. Why didn't you say so in the first place instead of beating around the bush? Those other fellows don't know what they're talking about. Come on, I'll take you there in my car. If they'd only explained to me what they want, there'd be no trouble."
• (Mrs. Meredith - Housekeeper) "Oh. Will you come in, please, gentlemen?"
• (Douglass Dumbrille) "Is Mr. Deeds in?"
• (Mrs. Meredith - Housekeeper) "No, he's over to the park arranging a bazaar to raise money for the fire engine."
• (Mrs. Meredith - Housekeeper) "Mal, you should've knowed he was in the park."
• (Mrs. Meredith - Housekeeper) "Knowed it all the time but these men said they wanted to see the house. Can't read their minds if they don't say what they want."

George Bancroft as MacWade

• (George Bancroft) ""At two o'clock this morning, Mr. Deeds held up traffic while he fed a bagful of doughnuts to a horse. When asked why he was doing it, he replied, 'I just wanted to see how many doughnuts this horse would eat before he asked for a cup of coffee.'""

Lionel Stander as Cornelius Cobb

• (Lionel Stander) "Welcome to Mandrake Falls Where the scenery enthralls Where no hardship e'er befalls Welcome to Mandrake Falls."

• (Lionel Stander) "You're wasting your time. He doesn't want any lawyers. He's sunk so low he doesn't want help from anybody. You can take a bow for that. As swell a guy as ever hit this town, and you crucified him for a couple of stinking headlines. You've done your bit. Stay out of his way."

Walter Catlett as Morrow

• (Walter Catlett) "Pal, look, how would you like to go on a real old-fashioned binge?"
• (Gary Cooper) "Binge?"
• (Walter Catlett) "Yeah, I mean the real McCoy. Listen, you play saloon with me and I'll introduce you to every wit, nitwit, and half-wit in New York. We'll go on a twister that'll make Omar the soused philosopher of Persia look like an anemic on a goat's milk diet."
• (Gary Cooper) "Well, I guess that oughtta be fun."
• (Walter Catlett) "Fun? Listen, I'll take you on a bender that will live in your memory as a thing of beauty and a joy forever."

• (Walter Catlett) "You hop aboard my magic carpet and I'll show you sights that you've never seen before."
• (Gary Cooper) "Well, I'd kinda like to see Grant's tomb and the Statue of Liberty."
• (Walter Catlett) "Well, you'll not only see those, but before the evening's half through, you'll be leaning against the Leaning Tower of Pisa, you'll mount Mount Everest, I'll show you the Pyramids and all the little pyramidees, leaping from sphinx to sphinx."

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