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Mr. Jolly Lives Next Door Quotes

Mr. Jolly Lives Next Door is a television program that first aired in 1970 . Mr. Jolly Lives Next Door stopped airing in 1970.

It features Elaine Taylor as producer.

The cast includes: Peter Cook as Mr. Jolly, Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall as Dreamytime Escort, and Peter Richardson as Mr. Lovebucket.

Mr. Jolly Lives Next Door Quotes

Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall as Dreamytime Escort

  • (Policeman) "Are you drunk, sir?"
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "Of course I am, I'm out of my bloody mind, I've just spent three thousand quid in there."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "Nicholas bloody Parsons."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "Escorts, bescorts; Come in if you're saucy."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "One thousand, five hundred and seventy four gin and tonics please Monica."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "LARGE ones."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "-- and she said "Well, I don't think you're a fishmonger. I think you've done a plop in the wrong lavatory.""
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "God bless Heimi Henderson."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "Living above an off-license, what could be better?"
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "Living in one?"
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "You're right. We must become a lot more friendly with Heimi Henderson."
  • (Nicholas Parsons) "What exactly was your winning slogan?"
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "Never, ever, bloody anything ever."
  • (Nicholas Parsons) "And that was your winning slogan?"
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "That's the one, Nicky. I've lived my life by that rule."
  • (Nicholas Parsons) ""I would like to spend an evening with Nicholas Parsons because -- never, ever, ever, bloody anything ever"?"
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "You're pissed, aren't you, Nicholas?"
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "What's Mr Jolly got that we haven't got?"
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "Our bloody Fairy Liquid."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "Morning, Ralph, how's the fluffy toy business?"
  • (Peter Cook) "Who the bloody hell are you, what fluffy -- Oh, brilliant, yeah."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "Well, that's Fattie's money out of the window."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "And Fattie."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "Well, it's his own fault. You shouldn't play "let's see who can fall out of the window the best" when you're drunk."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "Not on the 18th floor, no."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "Yes yes yes, it's a fantastic house, Nicholas. Now. Have you got any dirty films?"
  • (Nicholas Parsons) "No."
  • (Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall) "You BASTARD."

Peter Cook as Mr. Jolly

  • (Peter Cook) "And no-one knows you're here?"
  • (Peter Cook) "Look, just because my second name is Jolly doesn't mean I have to be jolly all the f***ing time."
  • (Peter Cook) "Who is it?"
  • (Nicholas Parsons) "Nicholas Parsons."
  • (Peter Cook) "f*** off."
  • (Nicholas Parsons) "I said Nicholas Parsons."
  • (Peter Cook) "I know, f*** off. I don't care if you're Bob Monkhouse, f*** off."
  • (Nicholas Parsons) "Do you think I could use your telephone?"
  • (Peter Cook) "Do I have to spell it out? F-U --"

Peter Richardson as Mr. Lovebucket

  • (Peter Richardson) "Now if you don't kill Nicholas Parsons by twelve o'clock, I'll kill you. Make it tidy."
  • (Peter Richardson) "But if you can't do that, make it messy."
  • (Unnamed) "Yeah. And if you can't make it messy --"
  • (Unnamed) "-- make it noisy."
  • (Unnamed) "And if you can't make it noisy -- make it stupid."

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