(Article is below...)

My Big Fat Greek Wedding Quotes

My Big Fat Greek Wedding is a television program that appeared on TV in 1970 . My Big Fat Greek Wedding ended in 1970.

It features Gary Goetzman; Tom Hanks; Rita Wilson as producer, Alexander Janko, and Chris Wilson in charge of musical score, and Jeffrey Jur as head of cinematography.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding is recorded in Greek, English and originally aired in Canada, and United States. Each episode of My Big Fat Greek Wedding is 95 minutes long. My Big Fat Greek Wedding is distributed by IFC Films.

The cast includes: Stavroula Logothettis as Toula Portokalos, Lainie Kazan as Maria Portokalos, Andrea Martin as Aunt Voula, Michael Constantine as Gus Portokalos, John Corbett as Ian Miller, Louis Mandylor as Nick Portokalos, Joey Fatone as Angelo, Fiona Reid as Harriet Miller, Bruce Gray as Rodney Miller, Bess Meisler as Yianni, Stavroula Logothettis as Athena, Gia Carides as Nikki, Arielle Sugarman as Paris Miller, Gerry Mendicino as Uncle Taki, Jayne Eastwood as Mrs. White, Bess Meisler as Yiayia, and Ian Gomez as Mike.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding Quotes

Louis Mandylor as Nick Portokalos

  • (Louis Mandylor) "See? This isn't so bad."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Are you kidding? Any second now he's gonna look at me and go, "Ha. Yeah, right, you're so not worth this.""
  • (Louis Mandylor) "Yes, you are."
  • (Louis Mandylor) "Listen, you know. I really think you should say: eho tria orchidea. It means: everyone, let's come in the house. I think everybody will really like it."
  • (John Corbett) "Eho tria orchidea?"
  • (Louis Mandylor) "Yeah. That's good. Very good. You got it."
  • (John Corbett) "I'm not falling for that again, Nick."
  • (Louis Mandylor) "What?"
  • (John Corbett) "Yeah, what. Angelo? How do you say: everyone, let's go into the house?"
  • (Joey Fatone) "Eho tria orchidea."
  • (Louis Mandylor) "Hum?"
  • (John Corbett) "Everyone: eho tria orchidea."
  • (Louis Mandylor) "Don't let your past dictate who you are, but let it be part of who you will become."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Nick that's beautiful."
  • (Louis Mandylor) "Yeah that dear Abby really knows what she's talking about."
  • (Louis Mandylor) "I've never seen my sister this happy, Ian. If you hurt her, I'll kill you and make it look like an accident."
  • (Louis Mandylor) "Hello ladies, fresh baklava."
  • (Gia Carides) "Nick, give me the camera."
  • (Louis Mandylor) "Toula. Toula, help me, c'mon."
  • (Gia Carides) "No boys allowed."
  • (Louis Mandylor) "Oh, nice mustache, Nikki."
  • (Gia Carides) "Thank you."
  • (Michael Constantine) "Niko, let's go, let's go."
  • (Louis Mandylor) "Dad, is that my tux?"
  • (Michael Constantine) "No, this one."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Nick, go to the airport and pick up the band."
  • (Louis Mandylor) "Okay, okay."
  • (Michael Constantine) "Hey, what is that thing?"
  • (Aunt Lexy) "It's a mosquito bite."
  • (Cousin Jennie) "I've got the coverup."
  • (Louis Mandylor) "You're all nuts."

Michael Constantine as Gus Portokalos

  • (Michael Constantine) "There are two kinds of people; Greeks, and everyone else who wish they was Greek."
  • (Michael Constantine) "Why you want to leave me?"
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "I'm not leaving you. Don't you want me to do something with my life?"
  • (Michael Constantine) "Yes. Get married, make babies. You look so -- old."
  • (Michael Constantine) "A xeno with big, long, hair on top of his head."
  • (Michael Constantine) "It is YOUR LUCKY DAY -- to be baptized into the Greek Orthodox Church."
  • (Michael Constantine) "Put some Windex."
  • (Michael Constantine) "Oh, Mrs. White. You find my mama again. You know, she come from Greece. The country I come from too --"
  • (Jayne Eastwood) "For Godsake, I know. Listen. Keep your mother off my lawn, out of my basement"
  • (Jayne Eastwood) "And away from my roof."
  • (Michael Constantine) "You know, the root of the word Miller is a Greek word. Miller come from the Greek word "milo," which is mean "apple," so there you go. As many of you know, our name, Portokalos, is come from the Greek word "portokali," which mean "orange." So, okay? Here tonight, we have, ah, apple and orange. We all different, but in the end, we all fruit."
  • (Michael Constantine) "Give me a word, any word, and I show you that the root of that word is Greek."
  • (Michael Constantine) "Where are you going?"
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "I'm taking a pottery class."
  • (Michael Constantine) "Ah. The Greeks invented pottery. Hmph."
  • (Michael Constantine) "Anyways, I tell her I will send her to Greece to find somebody."
  • (Gerry Mendicino) "She not too old. In Greece you don't tell anybody how old she is."
  • (Andrea Martin) "Ah, there you go."
  • (Michael Constantine) "She don't want to go."
  • (Andrea Martin) "She don't want to go?"
  • (Michael Constantine) "No. It's like, it's like she don't want to get married."
  • (Andrea Martin) "No, No, No."

Lainie Kazan as Maria Portokalos

  • (Lainie Kazan) "ENOUGH. ENOUGH."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "Don't you walk away from me. Sit down. Sit down."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "It's done. They fell in love."
  • (Michael Constantine) "How could she do this to me?"
  • (Lainie Kazan) "I gave you life so that you could live it."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "Nicko. Don't play with the food. When I was your age, we didn't have food."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "What is wrong with Toula going to school downtown?"
  • (Michael Constantine) "Is drugs downtown."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "What are you saying? Are you saying Toula will get involved with drugs?"
  • (Michael Constantine) "No. But somebody will say to her: take this bag down to the bus depot, and she'll do it."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "She is not stupid. She's smart."
  • (Michael Constantine) "I know she's smart. So what for she needs more school? She's smart enough for a girl."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "Oh. You think you're smarter than me, huh?"
  • (Michael Constantine) "No, I -- I mean -- You -- you know --"
  • (Lainie Kazan) "What? What you mean? I run the restaurant, I cook, I clean, I wash for you and I raise three kids and I teach Sunday school, you know? It's lucky for me I have you to tie my shoes."
  • (Michael Constantine) "Maria."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "We must let Kosta think this was his idea."
  • (Andrea Martin) "All right, I know."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "That he came up with it."
  • (Andrea Martin) "All right."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Ma, he's gonna figure it out."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "Don't you worry."
  • (Andrea Martin) "Okay, I know what to do you."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "You don't know what to do. You talk, talk, talk, all the time."
  • (Andrea Martin) "Do you want my help?"
  • (Lainie Kazan) "Yes, I want your help."
  • (Andrea Martin) "Tell me what to say. But don't tell me what to say."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "Perfect."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "Ian, are you hungry?"
  • (John Corbett) "Uh no, I already ate."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "Okay, I make you something."

Andrea Martin as Aunt Voula

  • (Andrea Martin) "What ok? She no Ok. Athena is married with three children."
  • (Andrea Martin) "Ian, I'm Aunt Voula. Let me touch your hair. Oh, oh oh."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Umm Aunt Voula."
  • (Andrea Martin) "Ok Ok. Why don't you come to my house and I cook for you"
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "That may be a problem."
  • (Andrea Martin) "Why it a problem? Don't you tell him I'm the best cook in the family?"
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Oh, I did."
  • (John Corbett) "Twice."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Ian is a vegetarian. He doesn't eat meat."
  • (Andrea Martin) "He don't eat no meat?"
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "No, he doesn't eat meat."
  • (Andrea Martin) "WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE DON'T EAT NO MEAT?"
  • (Andrea Martin) "Oh that's ok, That's ok, I make lamb."
  • (Andrea Martin) "Nikki, how come you no come to curler my hairs this morning?"
  • (Gia Carides) "Ma. I had to drop Dimos at work. And now, I gotta go open the travel agency, because, you know, some jag-off and his big-ass girlfriend are too busy."
  • (Joey Fatone) "Ma. Tell her I open up the dry cleaners every day, and I think it's about time she did something for a change."
  • (Gia Carides) "Excuse me? Do you know who's at the dry cleaner this morning? My husband is at the dry cleaner."
  • (Joey Fatone) "You're always at the beauty parlor, with your nails and your hair and everything."
  • (Gia Carides) "Don't you talk about my hair. You are so lazy. You and your big-ass girlfriend do nothing."
  • (Joey Fatone) "Did somebody sit on your hair? I mean, it looks a little flat there."
  • (Gia Carides) "Angelo -- bite me."
  • (Andrea Martin) "Disgusting. Be a lady."
  • (Andrea Martin) "What do you mean he don't eat no meat?"
  • (Andrea Martin) "Oh, that's okay. I make lamb."
  • (Andrea Martin) "Oh, Taki -- he looks Greek."
  • (Andrea Martin) "Toula. Toula. You're engaged. You're engaged-We never think this would happen for you. Never. Never. Taki, didn't we say that --"
  • (Gerry Mendicino) "We never think this day would come. Never"

Stavroula Logothettis as Toula Portokalos

  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "We told my grandma the war was over, but she still slept with a knife under her pillow."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "When I was growing up, I knew I was different. The other girls were blonde and delicate, and I was a swarthy six-year-old with sideburns."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Ma, Dad is so stubborn. What he says goes. "Ah, the man is the head of the house.""
  • (Lainie Kazan) "Let me tell you something, Toula. The man is the head, but the woman is the neck. And she can turn the head any way she wants."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "I had to go to Greek school, where I learned valuable lessons such as, "If Nick has one goat and Maria has nine, how soon will they marry?""
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Nice Greek girls are supposed to do three things in life: marry Greek boys, make Greek babies, and feed everyone -- until the day we die."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "My family is big and loud but they're my family. We fight and we laugh and yes, we roast lamb on a spit in the front yard. And where ever I go, what ever I do they will always be there."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Nice Greek girls who don't find a husband, work in the family restaurant. So here I am, day after day, year after year, thirty and way past my expiration date."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "My brother Nick has two jobs; one to cook and to marry a Greek Virgin."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "What happened? Biker fight? nose job? What?"
  • (John Corbett) "Uh -- yeah."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "No, really."
  • (John Corbett) "You don't want to know."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Oh I don't know. If I had survived an old lady ass-kicking I would want to brag about it."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "I'm going to the Jewel. Listen, I'll get you some pantyhose."
  • (Lainie Kazan) "No queen size. They make me look fat."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "If nagging were an Olympic sport, my Aunt Voula would win a gold medal."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "There are three things that every Greek woman must do in life: marry Greek boys, make Greek babies, and feed everyone."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "My sister married young and became a Greek Baby Breeding Machine."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "My dad believed in two things: That Greeks should educate non Greeks about being Greek and every ailment from psoriasis to poison ivy can be cured with Windex."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Why? -- Why do you love me?"
  • (John Corbett) "Because I came alive when I met you"

Arielle Sugarman as Paris Miller

  • (Arielle Sugarman) "Mom, I want to go to Brownies."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "I know. I know. But I promise you this. You can marry anybody you want."
  • (John Corbett) "Ah, thanks, baby."
  • (John Corbett) "Greek school. Pame. What's that mean?"
  • (Arielle Sugarman) "Let's go."
  • (John Corbett) "Let's go."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "That's pretty good."
  • (John Corbett) "Looking good, Gus."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Hi, dad."
  • (Michael Constantine) "Where you going?"
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Greek school."

John Corbett as Ian Miller

  • (John Corbett) "What do you do for Christmas with your family?"
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Uh, my mom makes roast lamb."
  • (John Corbett) "Mmm -- with mint jelly?"
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "No."
  • (John Corbett) "And?"
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "And --"
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "I'm Greek, right?"
  • (John Corbett) "Right?"
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "So, what happens is my dad and uncles, they fight over who gets to eat the lamb brain. And then my aunt Voula forks the eyeball and chases me around with it, try to get me to eat it, 'cause it's gonna make me smart. So, you have two cousins, I have 27 first cousins. Just 27 first cousins alone. And my whole family is big and loud. And everybody is in each other's lives and business. All the time. Like, you never just have a minute alone, just to think, 'Cause we're always together, just eating, eating, eating. The only other people we know are Greeks, 'cause Greeks marry Greeks to breed more Greeks, to be loud breeding Greek eaters."
  • (John Corbett) "Wow."
  • (John Corbett) "May I please date your daughter?"
  • (Michael Constantine) "NO."
  • (John Corbett) "You're that waitress."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Seating hostess, actually."

Joey Fatone as Angelo

  • (Joey Fatone) "Hey Ian, we're gonna kill ya. Opa."

Ian Gomez as Mike

  • (Ian Gomez) "Come on, let's go, I'm giving a pop quiz and I can't wait to hear the groans."
  • (John Corbett) "Wow. You're mean. I give a test on Hamlet but I give fair warning."

Fiona Reid as Harriet Miller

  • (Fiona Reid) "How are we supposed to know what's going on?"
  • (Bruce Gray) "It's all Greek to me."

Bess Meisler as Yiayia

  • (Bess Meisler) "Bloodthirsty Turks."
  • (Bess Meisler) "Ian, if you're gonna be in this family, I get you some earplugs because the Portokalos women, if they're not nagging someone -- THEY DIE."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Ah, you're in so much trouble when I tell my sister."
  • (Stavroula Logothettis) "Tell me what?"

Gia Carides as Nikki

  • (Gia Carides) "WHAT is going on? Mr. Pottery class -- nice to meet ya."

Add or Update Quotes

If you have a quote to add or change and want to let us know, please fill in the form below. Include the time in the film/video if possible so we can find it.

Additional Film and TV Quotes

Immortal Beloved (1994 film) Quotes | Big Fish Quotes | The Cremaster Cycle Quotes | The Emperor's Club Quotes | The Mosquito Coast Quotes | Days of Being Wild Quotes | Faces of Death Quotes | 'Allo 'Allo! Quotes | The Sweeney Quotes | Reno 911! Quotes | Last Comic Standing Quotes | Dream On (TV series) Quotes | Canada: A People's History Quotes | Targets Quotes | Pistol Opera Quotes | Insomniac with Dave Attell Quotes | Joe 90 Quotes | Wet Hot American Summer Quotes | The Ambiguously Gay Duo Quotes | Take the High Road Quotes | Maborosi Quotes | Stardust Memories Quotes | The Love Boat Quotes | It's Christmas in Canada Quotes | Night Stand with Dick Dietrick Quotes |