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Perfect Strangers (TV series) Quotes

Perfect Strangers is a TV program that first aired in 1986 on American Broadcasting Company. Perfect Strangers completed its run in 1993.

Perfect Strangers lasted 8 seasons and 150 episodes. It features Jesse Frederick as theme composer, and Jesse Frederick & as composer. Perfect Strangers is executive produced by Thomas L. Miller. Perfect Strangers is created by Dale McRaven.

Perfect Strangers is recorded in English language and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Perfect Strangers is approx. 24½ minutes long. Perfect Strangers is produced by Miller-Boyett Productions and distributed by Warner Bros. Television. Spinoffs for this show include Family Matters (1989-98).

The cast includes: Bronson Pinchot as Balki Bartokomous, Mark Linn-Baker as Larry Appleton, F.J. O'Neil as Mr. Wainwright, Sam Anderson as Mr. Gorpley, Melanie Wilson as Jennifer Lyons Appleton, Rebeca Arthur as Mary Anne Spencer Bartokomous, and Ernie Sabella as Donnie Twinkacetti.

Perfect Strangers Quotes

Bronson Pinchot as Balki Bartokomous

  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Where are the instructions?"
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "I threw them out."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "You threw them out?"
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "Appletons have never used instructions. My dad completely rewired the house in Denver without instructions."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Isn't that the house that burned to the ground?"
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "They never proved it was the wiring."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "You may call it intuition, you may call it common sense, you may call the wind Mariah --"
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "I hope you fall on your face with your hands in your pockets."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Well, feed me garlic and call me stinky."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Momma told me never to do the dance of joy alone, or I would go blind."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "I wash my face of the whole business."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "You said that you would not go overboard, and now look at you. You're scraping barnacles off the Titanic."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Cousin, do it for me, please?"
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "No, no --"
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Oh, please. Please, Mr. Scarecrow, which way is it to the Emerald City?"
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "Some people go that way, and some people go that way --"
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "But, of course, people do go both ways."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Hi, cousin. I just baked a big batch of bing bong binki binki bakalava."
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "-- Bing bong binki binki bakalava?"
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Bingo. Want a big bite, booby?"
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "Better not, buddy."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "-- bummer."
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "Bitter, Balki?"
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "You bet your Bibby Babkas I'm bitter, baby. I busted my butt baking these itty bitty binkis, and believe me, I banked on a bit of basic brotherly bolstering."
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "Balki, buddy, baby."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Your ship has finally hit the fan."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Now we are so happy, we do the Dance of Joy."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Yours?"
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "Yes."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Yours -- looks -- just like mine."
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "Yes."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "But if we dress alike, how will people tell us apart?"
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "Dental records."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Oh give me a line of credit."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Well, of course not, don't be ridi-cool-us."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "-- well, now you've done it. You're going to have to answer to the"
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "phone company."

Sam Anderson as Mr. Gorpley

  • (Sam Anderson) "And then there was the Christmas where my house burned down and I had to go to the hospital. No, that was a good Christmas. I got to sleep in a real bed."

Mark Linn-Baker as Larry Appleton

  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "Oh, my lord --"
  • (F.J. O'Neil) "Appleton, you idiot."
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "I just shot my boss in the butt."
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "Was it me, or did you see steam rising from his head?"
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Are you asking did; did I see steam rising from his head or did I see you rising from his head?"
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "I'm asking, was it me, or did you see steam rising from his head?"
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Okay -- Okay, are you asking was it me who saw steam rising from his head or was it you who saw steam rising from his head?"
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "I'm asking, was it me, or did you see steam rising from his head?"
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Yes. Now, I have one for you; Was it me -- or was that Miss Lydia's beauty mark sliding down her cheek?"
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "It was you. It was definitely you sliding down her cheek."
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "Take three steps east, please be meticulous."
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Well of course we will, don't be ridiculous."
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "I have --"
  • (Bronson Pinchot) "Oh, God."
  • (Mark Linn-Baker) "-- a plan."

Rebeca Arthur as Mary Anne Spencer Bartokomous

  • (Rebeca Arthur) "You know, having a ghost would explain so many things. Like how when you open the refrigerator, the light goes on."
  • (Melanie Wilson) "No Maryanne, the light goes on because --"
  • (Melanie Wilson) "Yes, Maryanne. Having a ghost would explain that."

Melanie Wilson as Jennifer Lyons Appleton

  • (Melanie Wilson) "Larry, it took us all morning to bake three dozen. Do you know how many dozen 2,000 are?"
  • (Rebeca Arthur) "166 and 2/3 dozen."
  • (Rebeca Arthur) "My father was a carpenter."

Ernie Sabella as Donnie Twinkacetti

  • (Ernie Sabella) "Hey, Appleton, I read your diary. You're a sick man."

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