Pie-lette Quotes

Pie-lette is a television program that appeared on TV in 1970 . Pie-lette completed its run in 1970.

Pie-lette Quotes

• (Deedee) "Hey, Charlotte."
• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "Hey, Deedee."
• (Deedee) "Now, how'd I know you'd be the first person I'd see when I got to? Is this? Which one is this?"
• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "This is neither. Well, maybe it's both, but, listen, this is the deal: you get to talk for, like, a minute, we're gonna catch up, and then you're not talking anymore."
• (Deedee) "Does everyone get to do this? 'Cause, girl, we gotta break it down."
• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "Did you know I was gonna get killed?"
• (Deedee) "I thought there might be the possibility, yes. I'm real sorry about that. I probably should've said something. But to be honest, and really, why not, at this point, if it were safe, I would've done it myself. God, this is fantastic. Being honest is fun."
• (Emerson Cod) "Ask her who killed her and you and what's with the monkeys."
• (Deedee) "Who are those people?"
• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "That's Emerson, I don't really know him, and this is Ned. He was my first kiss."
• (Deedee) "Now, you're adorable. Look at your li;"
• (Emerson Cod) "You couldn't have -- scooted back a little?"
• (Ned) "I didn't know she was gonna touch my cheek. Who does that?"
• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "Actually, she does that a lot."

• (Emerson Cod) "Sounds like you're a narcoleptic."
• (Ned) "I suffer from sudden and uncontrollable types of deep sleep?"
• (Emerson Cod) "What's the other one?"
• (Ned) "Necrophiliac."
• (Emerson Cod) "Words that sound alike get mixed up in my head."
• (Olive) "Me, too. I used to think masturbation meant chewing your food."
• (Olive) "I don't think that anymore."

• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "I'd kiss you if it wouldn't kill me."

• (Narrator) "At this very moment in the town of Couer d'Couers, young Ned was nine years, twenty-seven weeks, six days and three minutes old. His dog, Digby was three years, two weeks, six days, five hours, and nine minutes old -- and not a minute older."

• (Emerson Cod) "Been watching the news lately?"
• (Ned) "Yeah. There doesn't seem like much going on in the world besides a dead girl on a boat."
• (Emerson Cod) "A lot going on with that dead girl."
• (Ned) "Is that so?"
• (Emerson Cod) "Mmhmm. Fifty-thousand dollars worth of that's so. You interested in the conversation?"
• (Ned) "I could be persuaded."
• (Emerson Cod) "Well you better be persuaded quick because the dead girl's about to go in the ground."
• (Ned) "They just pulled her out of the water."
• (Emerson Cod) "Jewish. Christians leave 'em layin around; Jews gotta get 'em buried."

• (Olive Snook) "Our store is called The Pie Hole. As in shut your. Or in this case "Open your" because it's real good."

• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "I'll be so mad if you're lying. You'll have me scratching the drapes."
• (Ned) "I'm not lying. Please don't attack the window treatments."

• (Coroner) "You the dog expert?"
• (Ned) "Uh-huh."
• (Coroner) "Already had a dog expert."
• (Ned) "I'm the, uh, other one."
• (Coroner) "Mm-hm."

• (Leo Gaswint) "Do I have something right here?"
• (Ned) "No, there's nothing right there."

• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "Do you believe in reincarnation?"
• (Emerson Cod) "Hell no. The planet's falling apart. Right now, it's the children's problem. We reincarnate, it's our problem."

• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "When were you going to tell me?"
• (Ned) "In the morning or when it came up. Whichever didn't come first."

• (Olive Snook) "A dog needs to be touched. We all need to be touched."

• (Ned) "I just thought my world would be a better place if you were in it."

• (Narrator) "As he stared at her, he reached around his back and held his own hand, pretending he was holding hers. And at that very moment, she was pretending to be holding his."

• (Ned) "You died for a pair of plaster monkeys?"
• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "Deedee said they weren't worth much, their only value was sentimental."
• (Emerson Cod) "Those must have been some emotional monkeys."

• (Ned) "I was being selfish. I love to tell myself I was unselfish, but I know deep down in my primal sweet spot I was being unselfish for selfish reasons."

• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "I'm a friend of Ned's."
• (Olive) "Does he touch you?"

• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "I'd kiss you if it wouldn't kill me."

• (Emerson Cod) "Well, who died instead?"
• (Ned) "It's a random proximity thing."
• (Emerson Cod) "Bitch, I was in proximity."

• (Shiny Shoes Killer) "Didn't I kill you?"

• (Olive) "Doesn't she look a lot like that dead girl?"
• (Emerson Cod) "She looks exactly like that dead girl."
• (Olive) "You should take that as a compliment because she was pretty."

• (Ned) "I hate to be a bad host, but I'm sort of exhausted from chasing your coffin."

• (Lily Charles) "I can hold my breath for a long time."

• (Ned) "Hey, I think somebody's truck's on fire."

• (Narrator) "Young Ned did not think of her as being born or hatched or conceived in any way. Chuck came ready-made from the Play-Doh Fun Factory of life."

• (Emerson Cod) "How's he look?"
• (Ned) "Fine, but my threshold's pretty high so you have to take that with a grain of salt."
• (Emerson Cod) "That ain't a grain of salt. That's one of them blocks they give cows to lick."

• (Emerson Cod) "Do you know this girl?"
• (Ned) "I know of her."
• (Emerson Cod) "Know of her in the biblical sense?"
• (Ned) "I haven't thought of her since I was ten."
• (Emerson Cod) "Think of her a lot when you were ten?"
• (Ned) "I don't remember anything when I was ten."
• (Narrator) "The Pie Maker remembers everything."

• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "I've been ruminating, and by "ruminating" I mean "pondering," not "chewing cud.""

• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "You said you wanted to know who killed me so that justice could be served. See, I don't think that "Justice" was on the menu. Maybe as a side dish, but not as an entrée."
• (Ned) "It was most definitely an entrée. It was a Special of the Day. Could we drop the metaphor?"

• (Ned) "This is pushing your luck."
• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "Yeah, well, luck pushed me first."

• (Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles) "I suppose dying's as good an excuse as any to start living."

• (Olive) "How was your convention?"
• (Ned) "Conventional. How's Digby?"
• (Olive) "A little neurotic. He's a very needy dog. Do you pet him? Maybe if you pet him every once in a while, he wouldn't be so neurotic."
• (Ned) "I pet him. I'm allergic, so I don't actually touch him, but I pet him."
• (Olive) "With a stick? How do you pet him?"
• (Ned) "A stick is involved but it's more like a handle to a p-p-p-petting device."
• (Olive) "Your dog needs to be touched."
• (Olive) "We all need to be touched."
• (Ned) "You touch him, other people have touched him."
• (Olive) "He's your dog. Do you, uh, touch anything?"
• (Ned) "Of course. I touch lots of things."
• (Olive) "With affection? When was the last time someone touched you with affection?"
• (Ned) "I get touched. Could you get Digby's leash now?"
• (Olive) "Hmmmmmmmm --"
• (Ned) "You don't mind that I don't touch you, do you?"

• (Ned) "It's nice she had a little glimpse of the world before she died."
• (Lily) "Eh. The world isn't that great."

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