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S.O.B. (film) Quotes

S.O.B. (film) is a television show that first aired in 1970 . S.O.B. completed its run in 1970.

It features Tony Adams (producer) as producer, Henry Mancini in charge of musical score, and Harry Stradling Jr. as head of cinematography.

S.O.B. (film) is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of S.O.B. (film) is 122 minutes long. S.O.B. (film) is distributed by Paramount Pictures.

The cast includes: Erica Yohn as Agnes, Richard Mulligan as Felix Farmer, Robert Preston as Dr. Irving Finegarten, Julie Andrews as Sally Miles, William Holden as Tim Culley, Jennifer Edwards as Lila, Loretta Swit as Polly Reed, Robert Webber as Ben Coogan, and Pat Colbert as Nurse.

S.O.B. (film) Quotes

Robert Webber as Ben Coogan

  • (Robert Webber) "What if he catches something?"
  • (Robert Webber) "What are we going to do with him? It?"
  • (William Holden) "I've been thinking: a burial at sea."
  • (Robert Webber) "Beautiful. A burial at sea."
  • (Robert Webber) "I don't like to be a party pooper, but I get seasick."
  • (Robert Preston) "A-ha. The last of your excremental bodily functions. Worthy of the Guinness Book of Records."
  • (Robert Webber) "Is she gonna' be all right?"
  • (Robert Preston) "Well, it depends on what you mean by "all right." I once cured an amateur skydiver of acute acrophobia. Now, you could say he was all right, because he was able to jump. But you could also say he was not all right, because he was so stoned he neglected to open his parachute."
  • (Robert Webber) "You know, Irving, you're a real twat."
  • (Robert Webber) "To our late, great host."
  • (Robert Preston) "A sweet soul adrift in a sea of sour grapes."
  • (Robert Webber) ""A sea of sour grapes"?"
  • (Robert Preston) "Think about it."

Richard Mulligan as Felix Farmer

  • (Richard Mulligan) "That's what they want. That's where it's at."
  • (William Holden) "It's been my experience that every time I think I know where it's at, it's usually somewhere else."
  • (Richard Mulligan) "Sally Miles swears."
  • (Richard Mulligan) "Can she work?"
  • (Robert Preston) "Is Batman a transvestite? Who knows? I was specifically requested to alleviate her anxiety. Work was never mentioned."
  • (Richard Mulligan) "Irving, she's got a very big scene to do."
  • (Julie Andrews) "I'm going to show my boobies. What do you think, Irving, you've seen my boobies. Hmm, are they worth showing?"
  • (Robert Preston) "Well, since I can only render an evaluation based on a completely impersonal, purely professional examination of the subject, uh, subjects, I would have to say that in my humble opinion you've got a terrific pair of knockers."

Robert Preston as Dr. Irving Finegarten

  • (Robert Preston) "He'd be less conspicuous if he had his eyes open."
  • (Robert Webber) "He'd be less conspicuous if he was back in his box."
  • (Robert Preston) "Hello Polly."
  • (Loretta Swit) "Irving."
  • (Robert Preston) "You look like an anemic turtle."
  • (Loretta Swit) "You're gonna let that SHYSTER on?"
  • (Robert Preston) "I could sue you for calling me that, Polly. A shyster is a disreputable lawyer. I'M a QUACK."
  • (Robert Preston) "Come to think of it, why should I give you a vitamin shot? I'm the one with the hangover. B-12, B-Complex, Crude Liver, and a generous jolt of adrenal cortex. Chased by a Bloody Mary. L'chaim."
  • (William Holden) "I thought that was a chaser."
  • (Robert Preston) "Where would Salk or Pasteur be if they hadn't taken chances?"
  • (Robert Preston) "Now Lila, in order to inject this properly I have to expose my gluteus maximus."
  • (Jennifer Edwards) "Want me to do it for ya?"
  • (Robert Preston) "Are you perchance a nurse?"
  • (Jennifer Edwards) "No, I used to be a junkie."
  • (Robert Preston) "Would it endanger your amateur standing if I asked you to use a sterilized needle?"
  • (Jennifer Edwards) "You're the doctor."
  • (Robert Preston) "Oh, that's the nicest thing anyone's said to me all week."
  • (Robert Preston) "What is that?"
  • (William Holden) "Sounds like someone left a faucet running."
  • (Robert Webber) "I'm peeing."
  • (Robert Preston) "Into what?"
  • (Robert Webber) "My pants."
  • (Robert Preston) "He bought her this boat on their 14th wedding anniversary. They sailed her to Catalina. Sally flew home. I don't think Felix has been on her more than once or twice since then."
  • (Robert Webber) "No wonder Sally wants a divorce."
  • (Robert Preston) "Because he bought her a boat?"
  • (Robert Webber) "Well, he's only been on her once or twice since."
  • (Robert Preston) "On the BOAT."
  • (Robert Preston) "Ben, do you realize that in a matter of a few hours you have demonstrated most of your excremental bodily functions."
  • (Robert Webber) "I haven't sneezed."
  • (Robert Preston) "A sneeze is expiratory, not excremental."

William Holden as Tim Culley

  • (William Holden) "You stay in the car."
  • (Robert Preston) "Who stay in the car?"
  • (William Holden) "Him. Stay in the car."
  • (Robert Webber) "I don't wanna stay in the car."
  • (William Holden) "Look, we've got to be sly and stealthy, and you're too pissed."
  • (Robert Webber) "Bulls***, I can be just as sty and slealthy as you can."
  • (William Holden) "It's been my experience that every time I think I know "where it's at," it's really somewhere else."
  • (William Holden) "Felix, for the last 40 years I've lived a life of dedicated debauchery. I've consumed enough booze to destroy a dozen healthy livers. I've filled my lungs with enough nicotine to poison the entire population of Orange County. I've engaged in sexual excesses that make Caligula look like a celibate monk. I have, in fact, conscientiously, day in and day out, for more years than you've been in this best of all possible worlds, tried to kill myself and I've never felt better in my life. So, if you're really going to end it all, I can show you at least a half-dozen better ways to do it."
  • (William Holden) "What'd you give him?"
  • (Robert Preston) "Oh, a pinch of this, a dash of that. Sometimes referred to in the trade as a Sleeping Beauty Boilermaker. Take no notice if he begins to levitate. It's a common side effect."

Loretta Swit as Polly Reed

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Erica Yohn as Agnes

  • (Erica Yohn) "I mean, how erotic do you really want to go?"
  • (Richard Mulligan) "Go, go, E-R-O-T-I-C. GO. GO."
  • (Erica Yohn) "Sally Miles, America's G-rated darling, in the B-U-F-F?"
  • (Richard Mulligan) "Why not?"
  • (Erica Yohn) "Ohhhh, Felix darling, some of her fans still don't think she goes to the bathroom."

Julie Andrews as Sally Miles

  • (Julie Andrews) "You know, you are sexually notorious."
  • (William Holden) "Semi-fraudulent reputation; which I do everything I can to encourage."
  • (Julie Andrews) "Why ?"
  • (William Holden) "Because it's the best way for an old man to compete in a young man's world."
  • (Julie Andrews) "I am going to show my boobies. Are you here to see my boobies?"

Pat Colbert as Nurse

  • (Pat Colbert) "I'll see what I can do."
  • (Loretta Swit) "You'll do more than just see, missy. You'll do. See?"

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