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Spies Like Us Quotes

Spies Like Us is a TV show that debuted in 1970 . Spies Like Us stopped airing in 1970.

It features George Folsey, Jr., and Brian Grazer as producer, Elmer Bernstein, and Paul McCartney in charge of musical score, and Robert Paynter as head of cinematography.

Spies Like Us is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Spies Like Us is 102 minutes long. Spies Like Us is distributed by Warner Bros..

Spies Like Us Quotes

  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Did you hear that?"
  • (Austin Millbarge) "Yeah. It's a dickfer."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "What's a dickfer?"
  • (Austin Millbarge) "To pee with."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "-- I'm sorry I'm late. I had to attend the reading of a will."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "I gotta take a leak. You should go too."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "What are you my mother? Don't you think I'm capable of determining my own time to go to the bathroom?"
  • (Austin Millbarge) "So, isn't now one of those times?"
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "No."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "You mean you don't feel a certain degree of urgent pressure on the inner wall of your bladder, now, right at this moment?"
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "No, I'm fine."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "Well -- wouldn't you feel more comfortable being fully relieved of any excess fluids that might be building up immediately, now?"
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "I gotta take a wizz?"
  • (Keyes) "By your actions, sir, you are risking the future of the human race."
  • (General Sline) "To guarantee the American way of life, I'm willing to take that risk."
  • (Russian Interregator #2) "Every minute you don't tell us why you are here, I cut off a finger."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Mine or yours?"
  • (Russian Interregator #2) "Yours."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Damn."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "My objective? Well I object to taking a girl out, you know, and buying her dinner and then she won't put out for you."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "It's -- "Soul Finger" by the Bar Kays"
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "They must be havin' a hard time getting gigs."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Oh. Uh, will you hold my wallet for me while I take the test, please? There's a thousand dollars in there -- or maybe there isn't. Know what I mean?"
  • (Test Monitor) "Are you saying I can take this money if I help you pass the test?"
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "What do you think?"
  • (Austin Millbarge) "They're Afghani freedom fighters. They're on our side. WE'RE AMERICANS."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Feet."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "Hat."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "Show some balls, man."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "I think it's too late to try and impress them."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "What did she say?"
  • (Austin Millbarge) "She wants to know why we'd do such a thing."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Tell her so do we."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "We need a plan."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Let's play dead."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "-- Can I borrow your tent?"
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "So thanks for the bruises and you can keep the ahhh -- stool samples."
  • (Captain Hefling) "That was a static-filled, triple-scrambled microwave transmission between 2 soldiers talking in mandarin Chinese."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "The Chinese were only using a simple polyphonetically grouped 20-square-digit key transposed in boustrophedonic form with multiple nulls. I broke it with this --"
  • (Captain Hefling) "A drogan's decoder wheel? They put these into cereal boxes for kids."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "Yeah, I found it in a box of "lucky charms"."
  • (Captain Hefling) "Break it down again with the machines."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "I already did."
  • (Captain Hefling) "Well -- Then clean up your desk."
  • (Russian Interregator #1) "Why are you here?"
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Why am I here? Why are you here? Why is anybody here? I think it was Jean-Paul Sartre who once said -- how do you spell spell Sartre?"
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Owww -- and let that be a lesson to you."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "They do seem to be headed in that general direction. Maybe your dick's not so dumb."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "It got me through high school."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Was that me?"
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "All right. All right, I'm an American agent."
  • (Russian Interregator #2) "And?"
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "And? And -- uhh -- they -- they sent me here t-to assassinate your Premier."
  • (Russian Interregator #2) "I knew it. Pay up, comrade."
  • (Russian Interregator #1) "Let's cut his fingers off anyway."
  • (General Sline) "When we commissioned the Schmectel Corporation to research this precise event sequence scenario, it was determined that the continual stockpiling and development of our nuclear arsenal was becoming self-defeating. A weapon unused is a useless weapon."
  • (Golfer) "Ah. Mind if I play through."
  • (Golfer) "Doctor. Doctor."
  • (Golfer) "I'm glad I'm not sick."
  • (Ace Tomato Agent) "Won't you gentlemen have a Pepsi?"
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "I'm sorry I'm late, I had to attend the reading of a will. I had to stay till the very end, and I found out I received nothing -- broke my arm."
  • (Dr. Imhaus) "Doctor."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "Doctor."
  • (Dr. Imhaus) "Doctor."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Doctor."
  • (Dr. Marston) "Doctor."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "Doctor."
  • (Dr. Marston) "Doctor."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Doctor."
  • (Karen Boyer) "Doctor."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "Doctor."
  • (Karen Boyer) "Doctor."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Doctor."
  • (Jerry Hadley) "Doctor."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "Doctor."
  • (Jerry Hadley) "Doctor."
  • (Emmett Fitz-Hume) "Doctor."
  • (Austin Millbarge) "We're not doctors."

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