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Stranger than Fiction (2006 film) Quotes

Stranger than Fiction (2006 film) is a TV show that was first aired in 1970 . Stranger than Fiction ended in 1970.

It features Lindsay Doran as producer, Britt Daniel; Brian Reitzell in charge of musical score, and Roberto Schaefer as head of cinematography.

Stranger than Fiction (2006 film) is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Stranger than Fiction (2006 film) is 113 minutes long. Stranger than Fiction (2006 film) is distributed by Columbia Pictures.

The cast includes: Dustin Hoffman as Professor Jules Hilbert, Emma Thompson as Kay Eiffel, Will Ferrell as Harold Crick, Queen Latifah as Penny Escher, Maggie Gyllenhaal as Ana Pascal, Tony Hale as Dave, and Linda Hunt as Dr. Mittag-Leffler.

Stranger than Fiction (2006 film) Quotes

Queen Latifah as Penny Escher

  • (Queen Latifah) "And I suppose you smoked all these cigarettes?"
  • (Emma Thompson) "No, they came pre-smoked."
  • (Queen Latifah) "Yeah, they said you were funny."
  • (Queen Latifah) "What are we doing here? I don't even think we're supposed to be in here."
  • (Emma Thompson) "You told me I needed visual stimulation."
  • (Queen Latifah) "Yeah, I meant a museum or something."
  • (Emma Thompson) "I don't need a museum. I need the infirm."
  • (Queen Latifah) "You are the infirm."
  • (Queen Latifah) "Man in tweed?"
  • (Emma Thompson) "There's nothing wrong with him, he just likes looking at sick people."
  • (Queen Latifah) "Oddly spoken with disdain."

Dustin Hoffman as Professor Jules Hilbert

  • (Dustin Hoffman) "No one wants to die, Harold, but unfortunately we do. Harold, you will die someday, sometime. Heart failure at the bank. Choke on a mint. Some long, drawn-out disease you contracted on vacation. You will die. You will absolutely die. Even if you avoid this death, another will find you and I guarantee that it won't be nearly as poetic or meaningful as what she's written."
  • (Dustin Hoffman) "Some plots are moved forward by external events and crises. Others are moved forward by the characters themselves. If I go through that door, the plot continues. The story of me through the door. If I stay here the plot can't move forward, the story ends. Also if I stay here, I'm late."
  • (Dustin Hoffman) "You dislike your work?"
  • (Will Ferrell) "Yes."
  • (Dustin Hoffman) "Well, not the most insightful voice in the world, is it? First thing on the list of what Americans say they hate: work; second, traffic; third, missing socks. See what I'm saying?"
  • (Dustin Hoffman) "Aren't you relieved to know you're not a Golem?"
  • (Will Ferrell) "Yes. I am relieved to know that I am not a Golem."
  • (Dustin Hoffman) "Good."
  • (Dustin Hoffman) "Do you have magical powers?"
  • (Dustin Hoffman) "Meeting an insurance agent the day your policy runs out is coincidence. Getting a letter from the emperor saying he's visiting is plot. Having your apartment eaten by a wrecking ball -- is something else entirely. Harold, you don't control your fate."

Linda Hunt as Dr. Mittag-Leffler

  • (Linda Hunt) "Mr. Crick, you have a voice speaking to you."
  • (Will Ferrell) "No, not to me; about me. I'm somehow involved in some sort of story, like I'm a character in my own life. But, the problem is that the voice comes and goes, like there are other parts of the story not being told to me. And I need to find out what those other parts are before it's too late."
  • (Linda Hunt) "Before the story concludes with your death."
  • (Will Ferrell) "Yes."
  • (Linda Hunt) "Mr. Crick, I hate to sound like a broken record, but that's schizophrenia."
  • (Will Ferrell) "You don't sound like a broken record, but, it's just, not schizophrenia."

Emma Thompson as Kay Eiffel

  • (Emma Thompson) "Little did he know that this simple, seemingly innocuous act would result in his imminent death."
  • (Emma Thompson) "It wasn't just about finding a guitar. It was about finding a guitar that said something about Harold. Unfortunately, this guitar said: "When I get back to Georgia, that woman gonna feel my pain." This one said something along the lines of: "Why, yes, these pants are Lycra." These said, "I'm very sensitive, very caring and I have absolutely no idea how to play the guitar." "I'm compensating for something. Guess what." And then Harold saw it."
  • (Emma Thompson) "Don't answer that."
  • (Queen Latifah) "Didn't you say this phone never r; ?"
  • (Emma Thompson) "Shh."
  • (Emma Thompson) "Hello?"
  • (Will Ferrell) "Is this Karen Eiffel?"
  • (Emma Thompson) "Yes."
  • (Will Ferrell) "My name is Harold Crick. I believe you're writing a story about me."
  • (Emma Thompson) "I'm sorry?"
  • (Will Ferrell) "My name is Harold Crick."
  • (Emma Thompson) "Is this a joke?"
  • (Will Ferrell) "No. No, I work for the IRS. My name, Miss Eiffel, is Harold Crick. When I go through the files at work I hear a deep and endless ocean."
  • (Emma Thompson) "Oh, G;."
  • (Will Ferrell) "Miss Eiffel?"
  • (Emma Thompson) "-- It came to me."
  • (Queen Latifah) "How?"
  • (Emma Thompson) "Well, Penny, like anything worth writing it came inexplicably and without method."
  • (Emma Thompson) "Excuse me, where are the dying people? Most of these people are sick or injured; Which is great, don't get me wrong. But they're gonna get better, which doesn't really help me. Is there any way to see the people who aren't going to get better?"
  • (Head ER Nurse) "Excuse me?"
  • (Emma Thompson) "I'd like to see, if at all possible, the ones who aren't going to make it. You know, the dead-for-sure ones."
  • (Head ER Nurse) "I'm sorry, are you suffering from anything?"
  • (Emma Thompson) "Just writer's block."
  • (Emma Thompson) "Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God."
  • (Will Ferrell) "Miss Eiffel?"
  • (Emma Thompson) "Your hair. Your eyes. Your fingers. Your shoes."
  • (Will Ferrell) "Hello. I'm Harold Crick."
  • (Emma Thompson) "I know."
  • (Emma Thompson) "Why was Harold talking to this man? This man was an idiot."

Will Ferrell as Harold Crick

  • (Will Ferrell) "You have to understand that this isn't a philosophy or a literary theory or a story to me. It's my life."
  • (Dustin Hoffman) "Absolutely. So just go make it the one you've always wanted."
  • (Will Ferrell) "Aren't you too old to go to space camp?"
  • (Tony Hale) "You're never too old to go to space camp, dude."
  • (Will Ferrell) "What do these questions have to do with anything?"
  • (Dustin Hoffman) "Nothing. The only way to find out what story you're in is to determine what stories you're not in. Odd as it may seem, I've just ruled out half of Greek literature, seven fairy tales, ten Chinese fables, and determined conclusively that you are not King Hamlet, Scout Finch, Miss Marple, Frankenstein's monster, or a golem. Hmm? Aren't you relieved to know you're not a golem?"
  • (Will Ferrell) "Yes, I am relieved to know that I am not a golem."
  • (Will Ferrell) "I may already be dead, just not typed."
  • (Will Ferrell) "You're asking me to knowingly face my death?"
  • (Dustin Hoffman) "Yes."
  • (Will Ferrell) "Really?"
  • (Dustin Hoffman) "Yes."
  • (Will Ferrell) "How are you?"
  • (Maggie Gyllenhaal) "I'm lousy. I'm being audited."
  • (Will Ferrell) "Of course."
  • (Maggie Gyllenhaal) "By a real creep too."
  • (Will Ferrell) "I think I owe you an apology."
  • (Maggie Gyllenhaal) "Really?"
  • (Will Ferrell) "IRS agents, we're given rigorous aptitude tests before we can work. Unfortunately for you, we aren't tested on tact or good manners, so I apologize."
  • (Will Ferrell) "I ogled you. Sorry."
  • (Maggie Gyllenhaal) "Okay, apology accepted. But only because you stammered."
  • (Will Ferrell) "Ten seconds ago you said you wouldn't help me."
  • (Dustin Hoffman) "It's been a very revealing ten seconds, Harold."
  • (Will Ferrell) "I brought you flours."
  • (Will Ferrell) "This may sound like gibberish to you, but I think I'm in a tradgedy."
  • (Will Ferrell) "What if what I said was true? Hypothetically speaking, if I was part of a story, a narrative -- even if it was only in my own mind -- what would you suggest that I do?"
  • (Linda Hunt) "I would suggest you take prescribed medication."

Maggie Gyllenhaal as Ana Pascal

  • (Maggie Gyllenhaal) "Mr. Crick, it was a really awful day. I know, I made sure of it. So pick up the cookie, dip it in the milk, and eat it."
  • (Maggie Gyllenhaal) "I won't be paying, Mr. Crick. No matter how big the percent."
  • (Will Ferrell) "No, I know. But the percent determines how big your cell is."

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