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Stuart Saves His Family Quotes

Stuart Saves His Family is a TV show that debuted in 1970 . Stuart Saves His Family stopped airing in 1970.

It features Trevor Albert, Lorne Michaels, C.O. Erickson, Dinah Minot, and Whitney White as producer, Marc Shaiman in charge of musical score, and Hank Goldfritz as head of cinematography.

Each episode of Stuart Saves His Family is 99 minutes long. Stuart Saves His Family is distributed by Paramount Pictures.

The cast includes: Al Franken as Stuart Smalley, Laura San Giacomo as Julia, Lesley Boone as Dad Smalley, Julia Sweeney as Mea C., and Lesley Boone as Mom Smalley.

Stuart Saves His Family Quotes

Al Franken as Stuart Smalley

  • (Al Franken) "When it comes to partying, no one gets down like people in recovery."
  • (Al Franken) "As we say in program: progress, not perfection."
  • (Al Franken) "I deserve good things, I am entitled to my share of happiness. I refuse to beat myself up. I am an attractive person. I am fun to be with."
  • (Al Franken) "I want you to look in that mirror, and I want you to repeat after me: "I am a worthy human being.""
  • (Julia Sweeney) "I am a worthy human being."
  • (Al Franken) "Okay, I really couldn't hear you. Try again."
  • (Julia Sweeney) "I am a worthy human being?"
  • (Al Franken) "No, Mia, it's not a question. Try it again."
  • (Julia Sweeney) "I am -- I'm sorry, what is the second part?"
  • (Al Franken) "Worthy human being. I am a worth human being. Just say it."
  • (Julia Sweeney) "I'm sorry, am I saying it to you, or to myself?"
  • (Al Franken) "Just say it. I am a worthy human being."
  • (Julia Sweeney) "I am a worthy human being."
  • (Al Franken) "Okay, louder."
  • (Julia Sweeney) "I am a worthy human being."
  • (Al Franken) "Mean it."
  • (Julia Sweeney) "I am a worthy human being."
  • (Al Franken) "Believe it."
  • (Julia Sweeney) "I HATE YOU, MOM."
  • (Julia Sweeney) "Sorry."
  • (Al Franken) "Have you had enough time to look at the menu?"
  • (Unnamed) "We've had enough time to memorize the menu."
  • (Al Franken) "I'm sorry, I'm having a personal crisis. Can I take your order?"
  • (Unnamed) "For my wife, the Penne Arrabiata; and I will try the oso buoco."
  • (Al Franken) "You know, the oso buko is extremely fatty. You might want to try --"
  • (Unnamed) "I'll TRY the oso buko. And also the mixed baby field greens."
  • (Al Franken) "Lo-cal vinaigrette?"
  • (Unnamed) "Creamy Caesar."
  • (Al Franken) "On the side?"
  • (Unnamed) "ON THE SALAD."
  • (Al Franken) "Thank you."
  • (Unnamed) "And I'd like another double-scotch."
  • (Al Franken) "No."
  • (Al Franken) "Oh, Julia, you don't know Roz. She's like a cootie, or something."
  • (Al Franken) ""Dear Stuart, your show gave me the courage to feel my feelings, and to feel my feelings about my feelings, and my feelings about my feelings about my feelings. And my -- ""
  • (Al Franken) ""God bless you, Amanda Q.""
  • (Al Franken) "As they say in Al-Anon: Trace it. Face it. And Erase it."
  • (Al Franken) "Okay, Jodie, I would never ordinarily say this, but -- is there any way you can get to a pound cake?"
  • (Al Franken) "I'm going to die homeless and penniless. I'm still twenty-five pounds overweight. No one will ever love me. I could just kill myself."
  • (Laura San Giacomo) "Stuart, that is just "stinkin' thinkin'.""
  • (Al Franken) "My father grew up in the Great Depression; his mother's."
  • (Al Franken) "But today, I've decided to take a risk, and wear a new sweater. It was sent to me by a recovering sex addict, Melissa D., who knitted it herself; she said it gave her something to do with her hands."
  • (Al Franken) "Listen to me. I'm should-ing all over myself."
  • (Al Franken) "When the big night finally arrived, Dad had a new nickname for me."
  • (Lesley Boone) "Here we go. Is Sir Eat-A-Lot getting a little nervous?"
  • (Young Donnie) "Ha, ha, ha. "Sir Eat-A-Lot.""
  • (Al Franken) "I was already nostalgic for "Waste of Space.""

Lesley Boone as Dad Smalley

  • (Lesley Boone) "If I do this, and it doesn't work, he's going to make my life hell."
  • (Intervention Counseler) "How's your life now?"
  • (Lesley Boone) "Why don't you pick on somebody with pubic hair?"
  • (Mr. Dimmit - Flashbacks) "What?"
  • (Lesley Boone) "You gonna give me the ball? Or would you like me to shove it up your ass?"
  • (Lesley Boone) "Wanna hear my preference?"
  • (Lesley Boone) "God, you'd drink too, if you had Liberace for a son."

Laura San Giacomo as Julia

  • (Laura San Giacomo) "We'd all like to go home and save our families, but we can't. We're just not that powerful."

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