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The Beverly Hillbillies (film) Quotes

The Beverly Hillbillies (film) is a TV program that was first aired in 1970 . The Beverly Hillbillies completed its run in 1970.

It features Ian Bryce as producer, Lalo Schifrin in charge of musical score, and Robert Brinkmann as head of cinematography.

The Beverly Hillbillies (film) is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of The Beverly Hillbillies (film) is 92 minutes long. The Beverly Hillbillies (film) is distributed by 20th Century Fox.

The cast includes: Diedrich Bader as Jethro, Dabney Coleman as Milburn Drysdale, Kevin Connolly as Morgan Drysdale, Erika Eleniak as Elly May, Dabney Coleman as Milburne Drysdale, Erika Eleniak as Jed Clampett, Lea Thompson as Laura Jackson, Cloris Leachman as Daisy Mae 'Granny' Moses, Rob Schneider as Woodrow Tyler, Lily Tomlin as Jane Hathaway, Dabney Coleman as Mr. Drysdale, and Linda Carlson as Aunt Pearl.

The Beverly Hillbillies (film) Quotes

Dabney Coleman as Milburne Drysdale

  • (Dabney Coleman) "I'm president of a bank."
  • (Diedrich Bader) "Wow, can I be president of a bank too?"
  • (Erika Eleniak) "Jethro that was a mighty disrespectful thing to say to Mr. Drysdale. Ask if you can be vice president."
  • (Dabney Coleman) "Where is your mother?"
  • (Kevin Connolly) "She's changing."
  • (Dabney Coleman) "That would be too much to hope for."
  • (Dabney Coleman) "I'm ruined."

Diedrich Bader as Jethro

  • (Diedrich Bader) "Watch your head, Granny."
  • (Cousin Pearl) "Jethro, did you take care of those old brakes like I told you to?"
  • (Diedrich Bader) "Yes, Ma, I pulled them off the truck yesterday. The new brakes should be coming in the mail next week."
  • (Diedrich Bader) "I've finally figured this game out, Spanky. You take this ball, put it in this here gully. It rolls down yonder, then you hurl yourself down this slippery gully, and see how many of them there snake bashing clubs you can knock down before the ball gets there."
  • (Diedrich Bader) "I think I got this game figured out. You throw the ball down this gully. Then you throw yourself down the other gully, and try to hit them snake-hittin' clubs before the ball does."

Lea Thompson as Laura Jackson

  • (Lea Thompson) "Some women will search for many years before they find 'a-PEE-ness."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "what?"
  • (Lea Thompson) "'a-PEE-ness."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "Oh -- happiness."
  • (Lea Thompson) "What a stupid idiot."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "Did you say something, ma'am?"
  • (Lea Thompson) "What a stupendous intellect."
  • (Diedrich Bader) "That's cause I "grad-ge-ated" the sixth grade, ma'am. Only took three years."

Rob Schneider as Woodrow Tyler

  • (Rob Schneider) "She's got crap on her boots."
  • (Rob Schneider) "I've got my hand on your butt, and I'm squeezing --"
  • (Dabney Coleman) "TYLER. Get your hand off my butt."
  • (Rob Schneider) "You're not going to sleep with him, are you?"
  • (Lea Thompson) "That's not your problem."
  • (Rob Schneider) "Good. Laura, I've got my hand on your butt. (Laura disconnects the line) Hold on. I've got someone on call waiting. (disconnects the line) Hello. Hello. (gets back on previous line) It was nobody. Anyways, I've got my hand on your butt and I'm squeezing."
  • (Dabney Coleman) "Tyler, get your hand off my butt."

Erika Eleniak as Jed Clampett

  • (Erika Eleniak) "Well, come on, baby -- let's wrestle."
  • (Derek) "Is this some kind of joke?"
  • (Erika Eleniak) "Well, come on, baby. Let's wrestle."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "Now why you suppose he's doing that?"
  • (Diedrich Bader) "I reckon that's how people wave hello in Beverly Hills."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "I just wanna be who I am. And I ain't goin' to no France."
  • (Reverend Mason) "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here in case of an emergency, oxygen masks will fall from the overhead compartment. Your seat cushion can be used as a floatin' device. Thus sayeth the Lord."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "Excuse me, Reverend, but I believe you're reading the airplane safety instructions."
  • (Lea Thompson) "May we skip this part?"
  • (Erika Eleniak) "Elly, Nature made you a girl, and here lately she's been gettin' more and more positive about it."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "This here's what I call the Clampett Clamp."
  • (Derek) "That's not legal."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "Really? Well, try this one."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "That's real cute, son. This here's what I carry"
  • (Erika Eleniak) "."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "I reckon why they got two sets of steps."
  • (Diedrich Bader) "That's easy. One's for going up, and the other's for going down."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "Oh."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "I hear they got smog."
  • (Cloris Leachman) "What's a smog?"
  • (Diedrich Bader) "I reckon it's a small hog."
  • (Erika Eleniak) "Look. They's a-playin' 'Kick the Can'."

Cloris Leachman as Daisy Mae 'Granny' Moses

  • (Cloris Leachman) "Elly May. Don't spit from a moving vehicle. Wait till it's stopped."

Lily Tomlin as Jane Hathaway

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Linda Carlson as Aunt Pearl

  • (Linda Carlson) "You folks oughta move yourselves to a place like -- Beverly Hills, Californy."
  • (Diedrich Bader) "They got swimming pools and movie stars."

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