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The Caine Mutiny (film) Quotes

The Caine Mutiny (film) is a television show that first aired in 1970 . The Caine Mutiny ended its run in 1970.

It features Stanley Kramer as producer, Max Steiner in charge of musical score, and Franz Planer as head of cinematography.

The Caine Mutiny (film) is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of The Caine Mutiny (film) is 124 minutes long. The Caine Mutiny (film) is distributed by Columbia Pictures.

The cast includes: Katherine Warren as Lt. Keith, José Ferrer as Barney Greenwald, Humphrey Bogart as Lt. Commander Philip Francis Queeg, José Ferrer as Lt. Barney Greenwald, Robert Francis as Ensign Willie Keith, Fred MacMurray as Lieutenant Tom Keefer, Steve Brodie as Chief Budge, Lee Marvin as Meatball, Robert Francis as Ens. Willis 'Willie' Seward Keith, James Edwards as Whittaker, and May Wynn as May Wynn.

The Caine Mutiny (film) Quotes

Humphrey Bogart as Lt. Commander Philip Francis Queeg

  • (Humphrey Bogart) "Aboard my ship, excellent performance is standard, standard performance is sub-standard, and sub-standard performance is not permitted to exist; that, I warn you."
  • (Humphrey Bogart) "Get that red-headed fellow over there, that one there."
  • (Katherine Warren) "Sir, it's impossible to tell which one is red-headed. They're all wearing their helmets."
  • (Humphrey Bogart) "Keith; you're an idiot."
  • (Humphrey Bogart) "Anyone notice anything peculiar about Seaman First Class Urban? A shirt-tail hanging out of trousers is, I believe, regulation uniform for a bus boy, not, however, for a sailor in the United States Navy. These are some of the things we're going to start noticing again. Mr. Maryk, who is the morale officer?"
  • (Lt. Steve Maryk) "We don't have one, sir."
  • (Humphrey Bogart) "Who, then, is the junior ensign?"
  • (Lt. Steve Maryk) "Keith, sir."
  • (Humphrey Bogart) "Mr. Keith, you are now appointed the morale officer. In addition to your other duties, you are to see that shirttails are tucked inside trousers."
  • (Katherine Warren) "Aye, aye, sir."
  • (Humphrey Bogart) "If I see one more shirttail flapping while I'm captain of this ship; woe betide the sailor; woe betide the OOD; and woe betide the morale officer, I kid you not."

José Ferrer as Barney Greenwald

  • (José Ferrer) "I'm going to be frank with you two. I've read the preliminary investigation very carefully, and I think that what you've done stinks."
  • (José Ferrer) "I don't want to upset you TOO much, but at the moment you have an excellent chance of being hanged."
  • (Lt. Steve Maryk) "Will you take our case?"
  • (José Ferrer) "I'd much rather prosecute."
  • (Lt. Steve Maryk) "Well, I guess I can't blame you."
  • (José Ferrer) "I'll take your case."
  • (José Ferrer) "Well, well, well. The officers of the Caine in happy celebration."
  • (Lt. Steve Maryk) "What are you, Barney, kind of tight?"
  • (José Ferrer) "Sure. I got a guilty conscience. I defended you, Steve, because I found the wrong man was on trial."
  • (José Ferrer) "So, I torpedoed Queeg for you. I had to torpedo him. And I feel sick about it."
  • (Lt. Steve Maryk) "Okay, Barney, take it easy."
  • (José Ferrer) "You know something? When I was studying law, and Mr. Keefer here was writing his stories, and you, Willie, were tearing up the playing fields of dear old Princeton, who was standing guard over this fat, dumb, happy country of ours, eh? Not us. Oh, no, we knew you couldn't make any money in the service. So who did the dirty work for us? QUEEG did. And a lot of other guys; tough, sharp guys, who didn't crack up like Queeg."
  • (Robert Francis) "But no matter what, Captain Queeg endangered the ship and the lives of the men."
  • (José Ferrer) "He didn't endanger anybody's life; YOU did, all of you. You're a fine bunch of officers."
  • (Lt. JG H. Paynter Jr.) "You said yourself he cracked."
  • (José Ferrer) "I'm glad you brought that up, Mr. Paynter, because that's a very pretty point. You know, I left out one detail in the court martial. It wouldn't have helped our case any."
  • (José Ferrer) "Tell me, Steve, after the Yellowstain business, Queeg came to you guys for help and you turned him down, didn't you?"
  • (Lt. Steve Maryk) "Yes, we did."
  • (José Ferrer) "You didn't approve of his conduct as an officer; he wasn't WORTHY of your loyalty. So you turned on him. You ragged him; you made up songs about him. If you'd given Queeg the loyalty he needed, do you suppose the whole issue would have come up in the typhoon?"
  • (José Ferrer) "You're an honest man, Steve, I'm asking you. You think it would've been necessary for you to take over?"
  • (Lt. Steve Maryk) "It probably wouldn't have been necessary."
  • (José Ferrer) "There."
  • (Robert Francis) "If that's true, then we were guilty."
  • (José Ferrer) "Ah, you're learning, Willie. You're learning that you don't work with a captain because you like the way he parts his hair; you work with him because he's GOT the job, or you're no good. Well, the case is over. You're all safe. It was like shooting fish in a barrel."
  • (José Ferrer) "And now we come to the man who should have stood trial. The Caine's favorite author. The Shakespeare whose testimony nearly sunk us all. Tell 'em, Keefer."
  • (Fred MacMurray) "No, you go ahead. You're telling it better."
  • (José Ferrer) "You ought to read his testimony. He never even heard of Captain Queeg."
  • (Lt. Steve Maryk) "Let's forget it, Barney."
  • (José Ferrer) "Queeg was sick; he couldn't help himself. But you, you're real healthy. Only you didn't have one tenth the guts that HE had."
  • (Fred MacMurray) "Except I never fooled myself, Mr. Greenwald."
  • (José Ferrer) "I'm gonna drink a toast to you, Mr. Keefer."
  • (José Ferrer) "From the beginning you hated the Navy. And then you thought up this whole idea. And you managed to keep your skirts nice, and starched, and clean, even in the court martial. Steve Maryk will always be remembered as a mutineer. But you, you'll publish your novel, you'll make a million bucks, you'll marry a big movie star, and for the rest of your life you'll live with your conscience, if you have any. Now here's to the real author of "The Caine Mutiny." Here's TO you, Mr. Keefer."
  • (José Ferrer) "If you wanna do anything about it, I'll be outside. I'm a lot drunker than you are, so it'll be a fair fight."
  • (Capt. Blakely) "Mr. Greenwald, there can be no more serious charge against an officer than cowardice under fire."
  • (José Ferrer) "Sir, may I make one thing clear? It is not the defense's contention that Lieutenant Commander Queeg is a coward; quite the contrary. The defense assumes that no man who rises to command a United States naval ship can possibly BE a coward, and that, therefore, if he commits questionable acts under fire, the explanation MUST be ELSEWHERE."
  • (José Ferrer) "I've read the preliminary investigation very carefully and I think that what you've done stinks."
  • (Katherine Warren) "Well, if that's the way you feel about it, why are you taking the case?"
  • (José Ferrer) "I didn't say I'd take it. I told legal I'd have a talk with Mr. Maryk. Whether I take it or not depends on what he has to say."
  • (Fred MacMurray) "Steve, maybe you'd better get yourself another lawyer."
  • (José Ferrer) "Try it. Eight other officers have already turned it down."

Fred MacMurray as Lieutenant Tom Keefer

  • (Fred MacMurray) "This is what is known in literature as the "pregnant pause.""
  • (Fred MacMurray) "Will you look at the man? He's a Freudian delight; he crawls with clues."
  • (Fred MacMurray) ""There is no escape from the Caine, save death. We're all doing penance, sentenced to an outcast ship, manned by outcasts, and named after the greatest outcast of them all.""

Katherine Warren as Lt. Keith

  • (Katherine Warren) "Situation quiet; the captain's been put away for the night."

Robert Francis as Ensign Willie Keith

  • (Captain DeVriess) "Tell me, Keith. Now that you've had a chance to study the "Caine" more closely, do you like her any better?"
  • (Robert Francis) "The tour was very interesting, sir."
  • (Captain DeVriess) "The ship too messy for you?"
  • (Robert Francis) "Well, that's a difficult question, sir."
  • (Lt. Tom Keefer) "It's a RIDICULOUS question. The question is, is this mess a ship?"
  • (Captain DeVriess) "Disappointed they assigned you to a minesweeper, Keith?"
  • (Robert Francis) "Well, sir, to be honest, yes, sir."
  • (Captain DeVriess) "You saw yourself on a carrier, or a battleship, no doubt."
  • (Robert Francis) "Yes, sir, I had hoped --"
  • (Captain DeVriess) "Well, I only "hope" that you're good enough for the Caine."
  • (Robert Francis) "I shall try to be worthy of this assignment, sir."
  • (Captain DeVriess) "She's not a battleship or a carrier; the Caine is a beaten-up tub. After 18 months of combat it takes 24 hours a day just to keep her in one piece."
  • (Robert Francis) "Sir, you don't like the Navy, do you?"
  • (Lt. Keefer) "Who called the "Caine" the Navy?"
  • (Robert Francis) "How do we plead?"
  • (José Ferrer) "Your case depends on Maryk."
  • (Lt. Steve Maryk) "Well then how do I plead?"
  • (José Ferrer) "Not guilty, of COURSE. You're a great Naval hero."

Steve Brodie as Chief Budge

  • (Steve Brodie) "Hey, Meatball. Am I seein' things or are we about to run over our own tow line?"
  • (Lee Marvin) "That's crazy; we can't be; we ARE about to run over our own tow line. What are they DOIN' up there?"

James Edwards as Whittaker

  • (James Edwards) "Mr. Maryk, Mr. Keith. The captain wants a meeting with all officers, right away."
  • (Lt. Maryk) "Now? At one o'clock in the morning?"
  • (James Edwards) "Yes, sir."
  • (Lt. Maryk) "Do you know what it's about?"
  • (James Edwards) "Yes, sir. Strawberries."

May Wynn as May Wynn

  • (May Wynn) "I didn't mean to ruin your evening, I just bruise easily."

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