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The Carol Burnett Show Quotes

The Carol Burnett Show is a Variety show that debuted in 1967 on CBS. The Carol Burnett Show ended in 1978.

The Carol Burnett Show lasted 11 seasons and 279 episodes. The Carol Burnett Show is executive produced by Bob Banner.

The Carol Burnett Show is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of The Carol Burnett Show is 54 minutes long. The Carol Burnett Show is produced by Burngood, Inc., Punkin' Productions, Inc., and Whacko, Inc. and distributed by Carol Burnett, and CBS Television Distribution. Spinoffs for this show include Carol Burnett & Company.

The Carol Burnett Show Quotes

  • (Unnamed) "When we were first married you wanted my meatloaf five nights a week."
  • (Unnamed) "When we were first married there were a lot of things I wanted five nights a week."
  • (Reginald) "Now listen to me, you little fool. As far as everyone is concerned, father's death was purely --"
  • (Unnamed) "Murder."
  • (Reginald) "Murder? Murder, you say?"
  • (Unnamed) "Murder, murder, murder. Bloody, bloody murder."
  • (Unnamed) "You mean to say our father was murdered?"
  • (Unnamed) "No, I mean to say my girdle is killing me."
  • (Reginald) "Ms. Marble, I really must insist you stop snooping around. I simply will not tolerate a busybody."
  • (Unnamed) "Busybody? Busybody, you say? My body hasn't been busy in over 40 years."
  • (Unnamed) "Took us in a trip in this million dollar chicken coop."
  • (Unnamed) "I'll bet they'd like to put our names up in lights."
  • (Unnamed) "You could do Shakespeare, you look stunning in tights."
  • (Unnamed) "Watch it."
  • (Housekeeper) "Go away. For three hundred years, no strange person has been inside this castle."
  • (Unnamed) "You wanna bet?"
  • (Unnamed) "Your hands please. Your left hand shows your past. Your right hand shows your future."
  • (Unnamed) "Give me your left hand. I want to look at your past. Ohhhh."
  • (Unnamed) "What is it? What do you see?"
  • (Unnamed) "Last night. Moshimomoshivo."
  • (Unnamed) "What about the future?"
  • (Unnamed) "Ohhhh. You're a dead duck."
  • (Unnamed) "Slliiiiiide."
  • (Unnamed) "Oh, will you shut up."
  • (Unnamed) "You're going to be bitten by a verevolf."
  • (Unnamed) "A verevolf?"
  • (Unnamed) "Yes. Bevare the volfman will bite you tonight. Oy, are you gonna get it."
  • (Unnamed) "Oh, no. Is a verevolf bite painful?"
  • (Unnamed) "It's about the same as the bite from a wampire."
  • (Unnamed) "You ain't right in the head, Eunice. I think somebody blew your pilot light out."
  • (as Eunice Harper) "That's a new one, Mama."
  • (Unnamed) "Well, you just wait, there's more."
  • (as Eunice Harper) "Oh, no."
  • (Unnamed) "You've got splinters in the windmills of your mind."
  • (Unnamed) "For you had the perfect motive for doing away with father. I know about your gambling debts."
  • (Reginald) "Just as I know about that nasty little habit you picked up in the Orient. Eh, sister dear."
  • (Unnamed) "No, please don't. You have no idea what hell its been. Kumkwaits have become so expensive. How could I have been so stupid, stupid, stupid?."
  • (Caruthers) "You called, ma'am?"
  • (Reginald) "No, she didn't call Caruthers. She was discussing her kumkwaits."
  • (Reginald) "Oh. Well, I'm a leg man myself."

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