(Article is below...)

The Hangover Part II Quotes

The Hangover Part II is a TV program that debuted in 1970 . The Hangover Part II completed its run in 1970.

It features Christophe Beck in charge of musical score, and Lawrence Sher as head of cinematography.

The Hangover Part II is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of The Hangover Part II is 101 minutes long. The Hangover Part II is distributed by Warner Bros..

The cast includes: Ed Helms as Stu Price, Zach Galifianakis as Alan, Yasmin Lee as Kimmy, Bradley Cooper as Phil, Mason Lee as Teddy, Justin Bartha as Doug, Bryan Callen as Samir, Sasha Barrese as Tracy, and Sondra Currie as Linda Garner.

The Hangover Part II Quotes

Bradley Cooper as Phil

  • (Bradley Cooper) "So much for holy people. Bunch of bald assholes."
  • (Bradley Cooper) "Chow, what happened."
  • (Mr. Chow) "You guys texted me. Said you f***ed up and looking to party."
  • (Bradley Cooper) "Do you ever do anything that doesn't end up in a stand-off, Chow?"
  • (Mr. Chow) "I'm an international criminal. It always ends up like this."
  • (Tattoo Joe) "This kid's f***ing nine years old, and he's got balls twice your size. Show him your balls, Mal."
  • (Bradley Cooper) "No, no, no, w- that's okay."
  • (Bradley Cooper) "You wouldn't even be with her if it wasn't for us."
  • (Ed Helms) "Oh, this will be good."
  • (Bradley Cooper) "Stu, think about it. You ended up ditching Melissa -- two years later, you met your true soulmate. You take Vegas out of that equation, you would've married a c***."
  • (Bradley Cooper) "Oh, it's ok -- No, I'm allowed to say it, it's a bachelor party. Drink up everybody. Oh wait, there's no alcohol. I forgot, we're at a f***in' Ihop."
  • (Bradley Cooper) "Do you ever do anything that doesn't end in a stand-off, Chow?"
  • (Mr. Chow) "I a international criminal. It always ends like this. I met my wife at one of these things."
  • (Ed Helms) "You have a wife?"
  • (Mr. Chow) "Yeah, we married fifteen years. Whatsa matter, Mr. Chow not good-looking enough for woman?"
  • (Bradley Cooper) "Wait a second Chow. We're in Bangkok?"
  • (Mr. Chow) "Holla. City of Squala."

Zach Galifianakis as Alan

  • (Zach Galifianakis) "Oh, my word."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "What? It's a bag of Fanta."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "I don't get it. Is this a magic show?"
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "What is this, a PF Changs?"
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "When a monkey nibbles on a penis, it's funny in any language."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "I am a nurse, just not registered."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "I'm a stay at home son."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "I wish monkeys could Skype. Maybe someday."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "I'm actually a part of this weird wolfpack. Hey, it's not weird it's pretty cool actually, no membership fees."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "My uncle Roger says he saw an albino polar bear once."
  • (Ed Helms) "Really? Polar bears are white, how did he know it was albino?"
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "This one was black."
  • (Ed Helms) "Uh, are you sure it wasn't a black bear?"
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "Whatevs."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "You totally butchered that song."
  • (Ed Helms) "You totally butchered my life."

Sondra Currie as Linda Garner

  • (Sondra Currie) "Excuse me boys"
  • (Justin Bartha) "Hi Linda"
  • (Sondra Currie) "Hi Dougie"
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "I guess we don't do dessert any more, I didn't get that memo"
  • (Sondra Currie) "Well I'm sorry darling, I'll be right back"
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "Would a cupcake kill you?"

Ed Helms as Stu Price

  • (Ed Helms) "YOU'RE THE BEARDED DEVIL."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "You liked it. You smiled at me when I held up the bag of marshmallows."
  • (Ed Helms) "BECAUSE I LIKE MARSHMALLOWS, YOU f***ING PSYCHO."
  • (Ed Helms) "Oh my God. We kidnapped a monk."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "We live an alternative lifestyle."
  • (Ed Helms) "Well, we're living here in Alan Town / And he's driven our lives into the ground / When we woke up we were wasted and drunk / Phil got shot -- / We got beaten by a monk -- / I was happy and my life was good / Getting married like a dentist should / Roasting marshmallows on a stick / I got f***ed in the ass -- / By a girl with a dick --"
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "Ha ha ha, I remember that."
  • (Ed Helms) "And we're living here in Alan Town / But they're taking Teddy's finger now -- / And I'm pretty sure I'm gonna lose my s*** / -- and shoot Alan in the face / -- and shoot myself."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "You totally butchered that song."
  • (Ed Helms) "You totally butchered my life."
  • (Ed Helms) "Woah. Here's the deal man, I got a dark side. There's a demon in me."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "It's true, he has semen in him."
  • (Ed Helms) "I said demon."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "But you also have semen in you remember, from the --"
  • (Ed Helms) "It's not relevant, but thank you Alan."
  • (Ed Helms) "Was this right up against your scrotum?"
  • (Bradley Cooper) "Yup."

Yasmin Lee as Kimmy

  • (Yasmin Lee) "There is a reason its called Bangkok, sweetie."
  • (Yasmin Lee) "This one was following me like little puppy dog all around, all night, saying that he fall in love with me, asked to marry me."
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "Classic Stu."
  • (Yasmin Lee) "I dance for him, he tickle me, we have sex --"
  • (Bradley Cooper) "You're not married yet it's no big deal."
  • (Ed Helms) "It's cheating. No offense to you, you're a lovely woman, it's a violation of my moral code."
  • (Yasmin Lee) "What code is that? Stu you loved it, you were crying saying how special it was. I had to slow down so I didn't drop my load too quick."
  • (Ed Helms) "Load?"
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "What load?"
  • (Yasmin Lee) "Oh you know, my sperm."
  • (Ed Helms) "That is wrong, you're talking about my sperm. Where would your sperm come from?"
  • (Yasmin Lee) "My balls. You're in Bangkok, there's a reason they don't call it Bangc***."

Justin Bartha as Doug

  • (Justin Bartha) "Wait so where exactly are you guys?"
  • (Bradley Cooper) "I don't know, Doug. f***en Asiatown."

Sasha Barrese as Tracy

  • (Sasha Barrese) "Phill."
  • (Bradley Cooper) "Tracy. I'm sorry."
  • (Sasha Barrese) "Where the hell are you?"
  • (Bradley Cooper) "/huh/ It happened again."
  • (Sasha Barrese) "Don't say that. Please."
  • (Bradley Cooper) "No, this time we're really f***ed up."
  • (Sasha Barrese) "Seriously, what's wrong with you three?"
  • (Bradley Cooper) "So much Trace, I don't even know where to begin.""
  • (Sasha Barrese) "Oh God. How bad? Like no wedding bad?"
  • (Bradley Cooper) "Yeah."

Mason Lee as Teddy

  • (Mason Lee) "Hey -- Can I sit here?"
  • (Zach Galifianakis) "uh-uh -- Wolfpack only"

Bryan Callen as Samir

Add or Update Quotes

If you have a quote to add or change and want to let us know, please fill in the form below. Include the time in the film/video if possible so we can find it.




Additional Film and TV Quotes

The Haircut Quotes | The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard Quotes | Two Thousand Women Quotes | Kamen Rider W Quotes | Elmer, the Great Quotes | Weighed But Found Wanting Quotes | Can She Bake a Cherry Pie? Quotes | It's Only a Theory Quotes | A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010 film) Quotes | Revenge of the Electric Car Quotes | The Troop Quotes | 20 Years After Quotes | Detective Dee and the Mystery of the Phantom Flame Quotes | The Toilers and the Wayfarers Quotes | Sharing the Secret Quotes | Last Exit to Brooklyn (film) Quotes | Mega Monster Battle: Ultra Galaxy Quotes | The Graduates of Malibu High Quotes | Sea Beast Quotes | Third Dimensional Murder Quotes | Inception Quotes | The House Next Door (2006 film) Quotes | Carolina Moon (2007 film) Quotes | Secretariat (film) Quotes | Independence Day (1983 film) Quotes |