(Article is below...)

The Long Kiss Goodnight Quotes

The Long Kiss Goodnight is a television program that debuted in 1970 . The Long Kiss Goodnight completed its run in 1970.

It features Stephanie Austin as producer, Alan Silvestri in charge of musical score, and Guillermo Navarro as head of cinematography.

The Long Kiss Goodnight is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of The Long Kiss Goodnight is 120 minutes long. The Long Kiss Goodnight is distributed by New Line Cinema.

The cast includes: Samuel L. Jackson as Mitch Henessey, Geena Davis as Charlie, Yvonne Zima as Caitlin Caine, Samuel L. Jackson as Mitch, Geena Davis as Samantha, Patrick Malahide as Leland Perkins, Brian Cox as Nathan, Geena Davis as Samantha Caine, Craig Bierko as Timothy, Tom Amandes as Hal, and Yvonne Zima as Caitlin, Caine.

The Long Kiss Goodnight Quotes

Geena Davis as Samantha

  • (Geena Davis) "What, are you a Mormon?"
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Yes, I'm a Mormon. That's why I just smoked a pack of Newport and drank three vodka tonics."
  • (Geena Davis) "Suck my dick, every one of you bastards."
  • (Geena Davis) "They're gonna blow my head off, you know. This is the last time I'll ever be pretty."
  • (Luke (A.K.A. Daedalus)) "Torture, yes, a woman's face never looked so quite beautiful as when it's distended in pain, witness the beauty of child birth."
  • (Geena Davis) "Untie me and ill make any face you want."
  • (Luke (A.K.A. Daedalus)) "Let's not and say we did."
  • (Geena Davis) "Good morning, Raymond."
  • (Raymond) "Good morning, Miss Caine."
  • (Geena Davis) "What have we learned about the dangers of smoking? Give it here. Thanks. Tell anyone you saw me -- I'll blow your f***ing head off."
  • (Geena Davis) "Easy, sport. I got myself outta Beirut once, I think I can get outta New Jersey."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Yeah? Well, don't be so sure. Others have tried and failed. The entire population, in fact."
  • (Geena Davis) "-- It ain't over. You're going to die screaming -- and I'm going to watch. Am I telling the truth?"
  • (Geena Davis) "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "I hope not, 'cause I'm thinking how much my balls hurt."
  • (Geena Davis) "No. It's not a fantasy. I'm in the god**** P.T.A --"
  • (Geena Davis) "Life is pain. Get used to it."
  • (Geena Davis) "Die screaming motherf***er."
  • (Geena Davis) "god**** it. You're early. So Perkins wants me dead, huh? What's the rush? Why don't you just go away and come back at midnight? Shoo."
  • (Unnamed) "Hey, honey, this is a real big f***ing gun."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "This ain't no ham on rye pal."
  • (Geena Davis) "What the hell are you doing?"
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Saving your life. I would have been here sooner, but I was thinkin' up that 'ham on rye' line."
  • (Unnamed) "Good evening, pretty lady. How 'bout some company?"
  • (Geena Davis) "No thanks. I'm saving myself 'til I get raped."
  • (Geena Davis) "I let you touch me, cowboy. I think I need a bath."
  • (Geena Davis) "Can I ask you something? Well, you seem kinda -- low rent. No offense."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "None taken."
  • (Geena Davis) "What happened?"
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "I saved your ass. It was great."
  • (Geena Davis) "I'm leaving the country, Mitch. I need a fake passport and I need money, lots of it."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Well why didn't you say so? Hold on a minute while I pull that outta my ass."
  • (Geena Davis) "You couldn't hit a lake if you were standing on the bottom."
  • (Geena Davis) "It's like I'm in god**** prison. Do you know how that feels?"
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) ""YEAH. YEAH, I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THAT'S LIKE. FOUR YEARS inside, Marion, Illinois. A REAL s***hole. AND I'M NOT GOING BACK.""

Yvonne Zima as Caitlin, Caine

  • (Yvonne Zima) "Don't hit the cars."
  • (Yvonne Zima) "I can't."
  • (Geena Davis) "Yes you can. You're one of the X-Men."
  • (Yvonne Zima) "Mommy, am I gonna die?"
  • (Geena Davis) "Oh, no, baby, no. You're not going to die. They are. Cover your ears. Hey, should we get a dog?"

Samuel L. Jackson as Mitch

  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Question. You keep saying "I this", "I that". Like well"
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "it's like you don't need me anymore."
  • (Geena Davis) "Good point."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Hey, hey"
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "HEY."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Gracias."
  • (Geena Davis) "De nada."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "I'm always frank and earnest with women. Uh, in New York I'm Frank, and Chicago I'm Ernest."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Sam -- Ill be waiting for you to come and rescue me."
  • (Geena Davis) "Be just a minute --"
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) ". Da, da, da, da-da-da, got my hand gun, Da, da, da, da-da-da, got a rifle too, Da, da, da, da-da-da, Anybody f***s with Mitch, he knows just what to do, 'cause.I'm a --"
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "-- bad motherf***er."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Don't give me attitude, sir."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "We jumped out of a building."
  • (Brian Cox) "Yes, it was very exciting. Tomorrow we go to the zoo."
  • (Geena Davis) "You're Waldman."
  • (Brian Cox) "No, I'm the Hill Brothers bean buyer. Who else would I be? Hang on. If you want me to talk in front of him, you may be asked -- to kill him later. It works for me. Your call."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "I'm not talking 'bout the linen -- And I don't wanna change your life --"
  • (Geena Davis) "Movin' in."
  • (Geena Davis) "Huh?"
  • (Geena Davis) "It's not linen. The song's not about linen."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Whatever. You cold?"
  • (Geena Davis) "I'm freezing."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Turn on the heater. It doesn't work, but it makes a very annoying noise which distracts from the cold."
  • (Geena Davis) "I'll pass."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "-- everyone knows, when you make an assumption, you make an ass out of "u" and "umption"."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "You foxy bitch."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "You're telling me that you're gonna fake some terrorist thing, just to scare some money out of Congress?"
  • (Patrick Malahide) "Well, unfortunately, Mr. Hennessey, I have no idea how to fake killing 4,000 people; so we're just gonna have to do it for real. Blame it on the Muslims, naturally. Then I get my funding."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "And what about your daughter, what's her name -- Cathead?"
  • (Geena Davis) "Caitlin."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "THAT'S RIGHT, YOU CAN'T KILL ME MOTHERf***ERS."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Eight years ago, I was an Atlanta cop. My partner and I worked this fraud case together. That motherf***er hated me. I forget why, but he did. Anyway, some bonds went missing from the evidence room, and, when someone called Internal Affairs and they went searching through my closet, lo and behold, what did they find?"
  • (Geena Davis) "The bonds. Your partner put them there, huh?"
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "No, no, I did. I stole the damn things."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) ". I never did one thing right in my life. Now that takes skill."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "I'm goin' in."
  • (Geena Davis) "You can't there's too many of them."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Well kill them for me, bitch. What else you good for?"
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Oh, s***. Ah, that hurt like s***."
  • (Geena Davis) "I know. That's why I distracted you first. Same principle as deflowering virgins."
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "Huh? What? Virgin; ? What?"
  • (Geena Davis) "Read it in this Harold Robbins book. Guy bites her on the ear. Distracts from the pain. Ever try that?"
  • (Samuel L. Jackson) "No, no, I sock 'em in the jaw and yell, "Pop goes the weasel.""

Craig Bierko as Timothy

  • (Unnamed) "I'm hurt real bad. I think I'm dying."
  • (Craig Bierko) "Continue dying. Out."
  • (Craig Bierko) "You're about to have 2.4 children."

Tom Amandes as Hal

  • (Tom Amandes) "As the year draws to a close -- I would like to share with you just a few things about myself, things of which I'm especially proud. First, I am proud to say that I don't smoke, I don't drink and I don't swear. Oh s***, I do smoke and drink. To our dear friends, may the best of your past be the worst of your future."
  • (Tom Amandes) "I don't smoke, I don't drink and I don't swear. Oh s***, I DO smoke and drink."
  • (Tom Amandes) "As the year draws to a close -- I would like to share with you just a few things about myself, things of which I'm especially proud. First, I am proud to say that I don't smoke, I don't drink and I don't swear. Oh s***, I do smoke and drink. To our dear friends, may the best of your past be the worst of your future."

Brian Cox as Nathan

  • (Brian Cox) "Alice, please. Your dog, Alice. It and my appetite are mutually exclusive."
  • (Alice) "Well, what's wrong with the dog?"
  • (Brian Cox) "Simple. He's been licking his asshole for the last three straight hours. I submit to you that there is nothing there worth more than an hour's attention. I should think that whatever he is attempting to dislodge is either gone for good, or there to stay. Wouldn't you agree?"

Add or Update Quotes

If you have a quote to add or change and want to let us know, please fill in the form below. Include the time in the film/video if possible so we can find it.




Additional Film and TV Quotes

Election (1999 film) Quotes | The Horse Soldiers Quotes | The Accused (1988 film) Quotes | Species (film) Quotes | What Dreams May Come (film) Quotes | Music of the Heart Quotes | China Beach Quotes | Birthday Girl Quotes | 54 (film) Quotes | New Jack City Quotes | Cradle Will Rock Quotes | Wolf (1994 film) Quotes | The Wings of Eagles Quotes | Major League (film) Quotes | Sixteen Candles Quotes | Problem Child 2 Quotes | Innerspace Quotes | Teen Wolf Too Quotes | The Last Tycoon (1976 film) Quotes | Once and Again Quotes | Enemy of the State (film) Quotes | Zapata: El sueño de un héroe Quotes | The Damned (1969 film) Quotes | The District Quotes | History Bites Quotes |