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The Sweetest Thing Quotes

The Sweetest Thing is a television program that first aired in 1970 . The Sweetest Thing stopped airing in 1970.

It features Cathy Konrad as producer, Edward Shearmur in charge of musical score, and Anthony B. Richmond as head of cinematography.

The Sweetest Thing is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of The Sweetest Thing is 90 minutes long. The Sweetest Thing is distributed by Columbia Pictures.

The cast includes: Cameron Diaz as Christina, Christina Applegate as Courtney, Selma Blair as Jane, Thomas Jane as Peter, Jason Bateman as Roger, and Frank Grillo as Andy.

The Sweetest Thing Quotes

Christina Applegate as Courtney

  • (Christina Applegate) "That is the funniest thing I have ever seen in my entire life. I mean, I flew across that room. And you got f***ed in the eye."
  • (Christina Applegate) "How could you not know what a glory hole is?"
  • (Cameron Diaz) "Well unlike my WHORE friend Courtney Rockcliff, I don't usually spend much time in men's public bathrooms."
  • (Christina Applegate) "What a lovely ride."
  • (Selma Blair) "Your penis is a thrill."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "Your penis is a Cadillac"
  • (Selma Blair) "A giant Coupe DeVille."
  • (Christina Applegate) "Your penis packs a wallop, your penis brings a load."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "And when it makes delivery --"
  • (Christina Applegate) "It needs its own zipcode"
  • (Cameron Diaz) "Nine-Double Zero, Penis."
  • (Christina Applegate) "What you did was incredibly brave. You dropped all your boundaries and you met him half way -- s*** you met him more than halfway you went all the way to Somerset."
  • (Christina Applegate) "These are -- "The Days Of Our Lives"."
  • (Christina Applegate) "Maybe it's you. Did somethin' crawl up your poonani?"
  • (Cameron Diaz) "Hey. I have never had any complaints in the poonani odor department."
  • (Christina Applegate) "Yeah. Well neither have I, okay."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "High five on the clean poonani."
  • (Christina Applegate) "Bitch."
  • (Christina Applegate) "Look at this, no what is that, no, what is that, no seriously what is that? It's like Hello, Hi, Hi, How are you?"
  • (Christina Applegate) "Turn around."
  • (Christina Applegate) "Turn around."
  • (Christina Applegate) "Look, it's Jesus. Look at Jesus."
  • (Christina Applegate) "This isn't the Glichtman Barmitzvah is it? Mosha are you in here, no?"
  • (Cameron Diaz) "Come along Sharron. Mazeltov. Shalom."
  • (Christina Applegate) "Oh, you know, the usual. Defending the rights of my broken hearted clients and try to squeeze every single penny out of their miserable cheating spouses."

Selma Blair as Jane

  • (Selma Blair) "I can't believe I'm f***ing a big purple elephant."
  • (Unnamed) "Well Mr. Mooney is downstairs and he is P-I-S-E-D."
  • (Selma Blair) "Pised?"
  • (Selma Blair) "My body is a movie and your penis is the star."
  • (Selma Blair) "I was taking inventory in the back."
  • (Mr. Mooney) "Yeah, my Aunt Fanny."
  • (Selma Blair) "Ew."

Cameron Diaz as Christina

  • (Unnamed) "It's oozing and it's green."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "Eeew."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "I wasn't suggesting that the two of you get married, I just thought maybe you could get it on."
  • (Unnamed) "There's someone in here."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "Sorry."
  • (Unnamed) "It might be a while."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "How long?"
  • (Unnamed) "Let me put it to you this way. I had Lamb Curry last night and I'm s***ting out a Buick."
  • (Christina Applegate) "Was it absolutely vital for her to tell us that?"
  • (Cameron Diaz) "Wanna hear some poetry? There once was a man from Bandoo. Who fell asleep in a canoe. He dreamed of Venus and played with his penis and woke up with a hand full of goo."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "How are you stuck?"
  • (Frank Grillo) "I have a piercing --"
  • (San Francisco Policeman #2) "I don't get it, how are they stuck?"
  • (Unnamed) "Behind her tonsils"
  • (San Francisco Policeman #2) "How do you know that?"
  • (Cameron Diaz) "You're too big to fit in here --"
  • (Christina Applegate) "Too big to fit in HERE --"
  • (Christina Applegate) "OW. Unh."
  • (Selma Blair) "Too big to fit in here --"
  • (Cameron Diaz) "Oh, my God."
  • (Christina Applegate) "Oh my god, we are in Fame right now."
  • (Christina Applegate) "What a lovely ride"
  • (Selma Blair) "Your penis is a thrill."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "Your penis is a Cadillac."
  • (Christina Applegate) "A giant Coupe DeVille."
  • (Christina Applegate) "Your penis packs a wallop, your penis brings a load."
  • (Christina Applegate) "And when it makes delivery --"
  • (Cameron Diaz) "It needs its own zip code. Nine-double zero PENIS."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "Follow the yellow brick road? Huh. I'm following the yellow brick road -- following the yellow brick --"
  • (Cameron Diaz) "MUFFY. You look like my old doggy Muffy. What's in your mouth? What's in your mouth?"
  • (Cameron Diaz) "What do you got in there?"
  • (Unnamed) "Surprise."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "I got a penis in my eye."
  • (Christina Applegate) "Let me see."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "How is it? Is it okay?"
  • (Christina Applegate) "Yeah, it's okay, but I think you're pregnant."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "Don't go looking for Mr. Right. Look for Mr. Right Now."
  • (Cameron Diaz) "You know when I was 22, my breasts were up here, nice and perky, but gravity has taken them. It's like 22, 28, 22, 28, 22 --"
  • (Christina Applegate) "Buy some new ones."

Thomas Jane as Peter

  • (Thomas Jane) "I really hope I see you, but in case I don't, have a nice life."
  • (Thomas Jane) "I'd be careful with those fat-free chips; they cause anal leakage."
  • (Jason Bateman) "You cause anal leakage"
  • (Thomas Jane) "It says so on the bag."
  • (Jason Bateman) "What kind of marketing braniac puts anal leakage on his product? How can they even sell that crap?"
  • (Thomas Jane) "Christina Walters? Yep. I know her. Bitch. First she tries to pawn me off on her friend, then she stalks me at my own wedding. Then she says "I have no feelings for you. Blah, blah, blah, wah, wah, wah, yada, yada yada; ""
  • (Thomas Jane) "I had them take out all the calories for you."
  • (Thomas Jane) "Here's to fifty years with the same woman."
  • (Jason Bateman) "Dude, that's just depressing. She'll have saggy tits by then. She could tie 'em around her waist by then and use 'em as a belt -- Or just tuck 'em in her socks."

Jason Bateman as Roger

  • (Jason Bateman) "Come on, don't be gay in God's house. Gimme a good slap."

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