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He Died with a Felafel in His Hand (film) Quotes

He Died with a Felafel in His Hand (film) is a television program that was first aired in 1970 . He Died with a Felafel in His Hand ended in 1970.

It features Andrew McPhail as producer, and Andrew de Groot as head of cinematography.

He Died with a Felafel in His Hand (film) is recorded in English and originally aired in Australia. Each episode of He Died with a Felafel in His Hand (film) is 107 minutes long. He Died with a Felafel in His Hand (film) is distributed by Roadshow Entertainment.

The cast includes: Noah Taylor as Danny, Damian Walshe-Howling as Milo, Brett Stewart as Flip, Torquil Neilson as Otis, Alex Menglet as Taylor, Scott Major as Welfare Officer, Emily Hamilton as Sam, Tim Robertson as Melbourne Detective, and Francis McMahon as Dirk.

He Died with a Felafel in His Hand (film) Quotes

Francis McMahon as Dirk

(We don't have any quotes for this character)

Emily Hamilton as Sam

  • (Emily Hamilton) "What's happening to me? I can't even kill myself properly. I can't do anything properly."
  • (Noah Taylor) "I'm sure if you concentrated you would be able to kill yourself better than anyone else I know."
  • (Emily Hamilton) "Really?"
  • (Noah Taylor) "You do everything better than anyone else I know."
  • (Emily Hamilton) "Don't you find me attractive?"
  • (Noah Taylor) "Of course I find you attractive."
  • (Emily Hamilton) "Well then?"
  • (Noah Taylor) "Well we're mates. You can't sleep with your mates, it's one of the unwritten rules of the moral code of mateship."
  • (Emily Hamilton) "I didn't know there were any unwritten rules of the moral code of mateship."
  • (Noah Taylor) "Oh yeah, they're the biggies. No sleeping with a mate, no sleeping with a mate's girlfriend, no urinating on a mate's car. It's column of salt sort of stuff, Sodom and Ghomorra and all that."

Noah Taylor as Danny

  • (Noah Taylor) "Why is 3 o'clock in the morning always the hour of choice to put on Nick Cave, get depressed and kill yourself? What's wrong with the middle of the day when everyone's awake and ready to call an ambulance?"
  • (Noah Taylor) "Do you ever wonder if its all a big con Flip?"
  • (Brett Stewart) "Eh?"
  • (Noah Taylor) "This. Everything. What if none of it really exists? What if its like some big experiment and we're like ants trapped in a giant petri dish? What if there is a greater intelligence out there and its creating everything purely as a way of stop us going insane on them? What if nothing really exists until we sense it? My room doesn't exist til i walk into it. Front yard doesnt exist till i experience. You don't exist."
  • (Brett Stewart) "I don't exist?"
  • (Noah Taylor) "Well, you could be just a projection of my inner psyche materialised for my brain in order to keep me company."
  • (Brett Stewart) "What about the cashmere sweater babes over the road, with their swishy little skirts and all? Would they be from your inner psyche or mine?"
  • (Noah Taylor) "Probably yours I reckon Flip."
  • (Noah Taylor) "I knew this bloke once, right. And -- he used to masturbate so much that he grew very fond of his hand. So much so, that he began to talk to it and he put a little face on it and he called it muriel. And after a while Muriel began to talk back to him."
  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "Fore."
  • (Noah Taylor) "He would get her all doled up in make up and specially made little clothes and at night she'd go down and make intense mad passionate love to him. Anyway, one night about three am"
  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "Cheers"
  • (Noah Taylor) "He wakes up in a cold sweat. And hears all this panting and moaning and groaning coming from the next door neighbours apartment. And he looks down at his hand, there's nothing there. Its gone. Its just this bloodied stump. So he staggers out into the hallway and he sees that the next door neighbour's doors is wide open. So he pops his head in and what does he see, on the bed, his hand, Muriel, all dressed up to the nines, make up on, going down on the next door neighbour."
  • (Noah Taylor) "It's a true story"
  • (Noah Taylor) "Tyler, These friends of yours. They wouldn't be by any chance Nazi's would they?"
  • (Alex Menglet) "-- I prefer to call them politically challenged."
  • (Noah Taylor) "Want to get married?"
  • (Emily Hamilton) "Can't, got to go out later."

Damian Walshe-Howling as Milo

  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "Bulls***."
  • (Torquil Neilson) "It's not bulls***."
  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "It's f***ing bulls***."
  • (Torquil Neilson) "White's bleeding over Orange, cradles him in his arms, and says, "I love you, man.""
  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "That's f***ing bulls***, and even if it wasn't f***ing bulls***, they'd be saying it like blokes say it to each other."
  • (Torquil Neilson) "Then Orange says back, "I love you, too, man.""
  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "Yeah, they're saying, "I love you, man," not "I LOVE you, man.""
  • (Torquil Neilson) "Why would he say that? I mean, why would he say, "I love you, too, man" if he wasn't a chocolate-dipper."
  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "He's bleeding to death, for Christ's sake. You say s*** like that when you're bleeding to death."
  • (Torquil Neilson) "He's been holding it in the whole time. He thinks he's gonna die. He has to let it out, otherwise his secret will be carried with him to the grave."
  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "Bull-f***in-s***. Look, I love Danny here, but that doesn't mean I'm a f***ing chocolate-dipper. I'm no f***ing chocolate-dipper, mate."
  • (Brett Stewart) "What about that bit where they're point all those guns at each other?"
  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "What about it?"
  • (Brett Stewart) "Well, maybe it's not really their guns they're pointing."
  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "There's no way, pal. No way. No f***ing way."
  • (Brett Stewart) "Dude, I've seen it, like, eighteen times."
  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "That's f***ing bulls***. There are no f***ing chocolate-dippers in that movie. It's my favourite f***ing movie, man, and you're all f***ing ruining it for me."

Alex Menglet as Taylor

  • (Alex Menglet) "Do you reckon I should look at P for prostitue or E for escort?"

Scott Major as Welfare Officer

  • (Scott Major) "A writer. You're a writer?"
  • (Noah Taylor) "I'm a writer."
  • (Scott Major) "I worked at Burger King for three years before getting this job. I've got an arts degree. If we get you a job that says you lick toilet bowls, then that's what you do, you lick toilet bowls. Ha. A writer. Jesus."

Brett Stewart as Flip

  • (Brett Stewart) "Yeah, I heard tell once dudes that a guy has about 4,000 times in him before he's all used up."
  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "It's f***ing bulls***."
  • (Noah Taylor) "More like forty thousand."
  • (Torquil Neilson) "In your dreams, stick man."
  • (Noah Taylor) "Add it up, two times a day, seven days a week for what -- I don't know 40 years?"
  • (Alex Menglet) "Two times a day?"
  • (Torquil Neilson) "Who the f*** gets to do it two times a f***ing day?"
  • (Noah Taylor) "Me and Jess used to."
  • (Torquil Neilson) "Two times a day, seven days a week, 52 weeks a year --"
  • (Noah Taylor) "Me and Jess used to do it five times a day."
  • (Alex Menglet) "For forty years? What about hangovers? What about christmas day? How the f*** are you going to do it five times on a Christmas Day while the family is sitting around carving up the turkey?"
  • (Noah Taylor) "Make up for it at night with the wife."
  • (Alex Menglet) "Wife? What wife? You haven't had a wife in over six months."
  • (Noah Taylor) "I haven't got a problem getting women. I've got this thing I do that make them go gaga."
  • (Torquil Neilson) "How exactly do you mean gaga?"
  • (Noah Taylor) "Gaga. Insane, beserk, talking in tongues, you know -- gaga."
  • (Damian Walshe-Howling) "What like some sort of secret weapon?"
  • (Brett Stewart) "Some kind of weird sideways movement?"
  • (Noah Taylor) "I can't really say flip, but its pretty special. Though it could be worth a lot of money."
  • (Alex Menglet) "Let's just get this straight. You're 20-something years old, you have no job, no money, very few prospescts. You haven't been seen in the vicinity of anything which even faintly resembles a member of the opposite sex in over 6 months. And yet you sit here and tell us that you have some kind of special thing that makes the other side go gaga. Well if it makes them go so f***ing gaga what the f*** are you doing here with us losers?"
  • (Brett Stewart) "He's got a point there Danster."
  • (Noah Taylor) "Well I didn't say it fixed all the emotional stuff did I?"

Tim Robertson as Melbourne Detective

  • (Tim Robertson) "I'll tell you how this game works Daniel. We're the cops, we get to ask the questions. You're the suspect, you get to complain about your civil liberties, perhaps get shot, maybe even killed. And it has to stay like that Daniel, otherwise everything falls out of balance. When things fall out of balance, you know what happens then don't you Daniel. Your spiritual values start to decline. You get your disintegration of your social structure, don't you? The system collapses. Petulance, flood, famine. It happened to the Romans, it happened to the Greeks, it happened to the Ancient Mesopatamians. And we don't want it happening to us do we Daniel?"

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