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Brüno Quotes

Brüno is a TV show that debuted in 1970 . Brüno stopped airing in 1970.

It features Sacha Baron Cohen; Jay Roach; Dan Mazer as producer, Erran Baron Cohen in charge of musical score, and Anthony Hardwick, and Wolfgang Held as head of cinematography.

Brüno is recorded in English, and German and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Brüno is 82 minutes long. Brüno is distributed by Universal Studios.

The cast includes: Sacha Baron Cohen as Brüno, and Gustaf Hammarsten as Lutz.

Brüno Quotes

Sacha Baron Cohen as Brüno

  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "I swapped him."
  • (Unnamed) "Swapped the baby for what?"
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "For an iPod."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "I wouldn't want to wake up and find that I'm torn in my arschenholer."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "It's just this bear took my clothes. He took everything apart from these condoms."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "Look at the four of us; we are so like the Sex in the City girls."
  • (Unnamed) "Oh no, we aren't either."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "Which one are you, Donny?"
  • (Unnamed) "I ain't any one of them, I'm Donny."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "That is such a Samantha thing to say."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "We have chosen your baby to be dressed as a Nazi Officer, pushing a wheelbarrow, with a Jewish baby, into an oven."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "I've gotta be honest: he's a real dick magnet."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "How do you protect yourself from a dildo?"
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "Look me in the eye."
  • (Unnamed) "This is a f***in' swingers' party. OK? If you don't want p*****, if you don't want f***in' -- then quit f***in' touching me and quit looking at me. I definitely ain't lookin' at you in the eye. OK? I didn't come here for no f***in' queer s***, OK? I know what you're doin'."
  • (Unnamed) "What type of belt is that, candidate? What is that?"
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "D and G."
  • (Unnamed) "What is D and G?"
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "Dolce and Gabbana, hello."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "I am going to be the biggest Austrian celebrity since Hitler."
  • (Unnamed) "Is there something that you, like, that you believe in, like --"
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "Well, I'm really into issues."
  • (Unnamed) "Yeah. Global warming's only getting worse, so --"
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "Great."
  • (Unnamed) "That would be, that's something to get involved now, so -- we can just help East, uh, Africa in order to help for our future in order for everyone -- that's a beneficial thing to be involved with now."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "There's a lot of African Americans in Africa."
  • (Unnamed) "No. There's a lot of Africans in Africa."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "That's racist."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "You must produce a lot of milk."
  • (Unnamed) "What's the baby's name?"
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "I gave him like a traditional African name: O.J."
  • (Unnamed) "WHAT?"
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "Donny, let me in your tent. A bear stole all of my clothes -- except for these condoms."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "Looking up at the stars makes me think of all the hot guys in the world."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "Can I give you guys a word of advice? Lose the beards, because your King Osama looks like a kind of dirty wizard -- or a homeless Santa."
  • (Elton John) "War's just based on hate and fear / Stop fighting, North and South Korea."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "You're both basically Chinese."
  • (Chris Martin) "He's Brüno, dove of peace."
  • (Snoop Dogg) "Hey, yo Brüno, where the bitches at?"
  • (Unnamed) "By the way, where's your uniform? Go get your uniform on. Do it."
  • (Unnamed) "Oh my god. What's up with the scarf?"
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "That is like -- it's my own --"
  • (Unnamed) "Let me introduce you to somebody. Captain Miles."
  • (Unnamed) "Candidate, what are you doing? Stand into position of attention, candidate."
  • (Unnamed) "Do it."
  • (Unnamed) "Head and eyes straight forwards, candidate."
  • (Unnamed) "Do it."
  • (Unnamed) "Head and eyes straight forward."
  • (Unnamed) "Do it."
  • (Unnamed) "Stand still, candidate."
  • (Unnamed) "Do it."
  • (Unnamed) "That is not part of the uniform, candidate. You need to take that off."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "This outfit is to matchy-matchy as it is. And so I was just trying to break it up with some simple horizontal lines."
  • (Unnamed) "Do you have an attitude, candidate?"
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "No but, sir --."
  • (Unnamed) "I think we do --"
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "Sir, she's got an attitude."
  • (Unnamed) "Not sir, officer candidate."
  • (Unnamed) "What?"
  • (Unnamed) "Did you just call me a she? Get down."
  • (Unnamed) "Your finger's in my alley."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "Not yet."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "I'm committing carbicide."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "So you were never gay?"
  • (Unnamed) "Mh-mh."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "It's ironic that you should have amazing blowjob lips."
  • (Unnamed) "These-these lips were made to praise Jesus."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "So -- if they are nice they are gay, right?"
  • (Ron Paul) "All right, get out of here. This is ended."
  • (Ron Paul) "That guy's queerer than the blazes. He took his clothes off. Let's get goin'. He's queer, he's crazy, he put a hit on me and took his clothes off."
  • (Sacha Baron Cohen) "I couldn't even schtupp RuPaul."

Gustaf Hammarsten as Lutz

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