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Show Me the Monkey Quotes

Show Me the Monkey is a television program that first aired in 1970 . Show Me the Monkey ended in 1970.

Show Me the Monkey Quotes

  • (Eli 'Weevil' Navarro) "So, I came in at around seven. First, I thought he just had a bender and fell asleep at his desk, but then I saw blood -- and the note."
  • (Keith Mars) "A note?"
  • (Eli 'Weevil' Navarro) "Yeah, on the computer. He had a memo on the screen, saying, "Goodbye, cruel world zzzz." I guess his head fell on the Z. It's a shame, man. He was pretty cool -- for a weird, old, white dude."
  • (Veronica Mars) "Someone was doe-eyed, tongue-tied, and dare I say, "twitterpated.""
  • (Cindy 'Mac' Mackenzie) "Does this say cruelty free?"
  • (Parker Lee) "It says -- I've given up -- don't look at me."
  • (Cindy 'Mac' Mackenzie) "My "libidon't" kicked in."
  • (Dick Casablancas) "So what -- You're just going to mope around like the guy in -- What's that book when the guy's mom dies and he comes back to Jersey? And he's got that motorcycle sidecar?"
  • (Logan Echolls) "Garden State was never a book."
  • (Dick Casablancas) "It wasn't? Oops -- So much for that paper. But, if this were a book, the theme of my essay would be the symbolism of how your character had his man parts ripped off by the Veronica Mars character."
  • (Logan Echolls) "My man parts are intact."
  • (Dick Casablancas) "Show me."
  • (Logan Echolls) "You're going to have to take my word for it."
  • (Dick Casablancas) "I mean symbolically. We're young, single men in our sexual prime. And the only reason we're not out there going hog wild is because of your feelings? What are we on The View? Am I Rosie O'Donnell?"
  • (Professor McGregor) "The only way to conclusively prove test results is through an autopsy."
  • (Veronica Mars) "So that monkey good life includes a blindfold and a last smoke?"
  • (Cindy 'Mac' Mackenzie) "I just can't wait for the moment when you're in a tree going, "Here, monkey, monkey," and holding out a banana, and then the branch breaks and hilarity ensues."
  • (Veronica) "Ah, if there's hilarity, I charge extra."
  • (Veronica Mars) "Like, in a tiny van with a sob story about needing a place to crash?"
  • (Veronica Mars) "We're talking monkey? As in?"
  • (Cindy 'Mac' Mackenzie) "Touch my."
  • (Cindy 'Mac' Mackenzie) "Okay, I get cruelty-free, but I'm an animal, too, and the clove cigarettes and no-bathing thing is cruelty to me."
  • (Veronica) "Why settle for something not good just cause it's something?"
  • (Veronica Mars) "How did you find me? My cell phone is not on."
  • (Keith Mars) "Maybe I'll tell you someday."
  • (Veronica Mars) "You should hire someone to do this."
  • (Keith Mars) "You're lucky I'm not a farmer, you'd be out plowing a field."
  • (Veronica Mars) "According to the PHAT website, we should stay away from fur, obviously, down, leather."
  • (Cindy 'Mac' Mackenzie) "The one day I feel like wearing a leather miniskirt."
  • (Veronica Mars) "If it ever had a face or a parent, you can't wear it."
  • (Cindy 'Mac' Mackenzie) "So my mollusk shoes are cool?"
  • (Stosh 'Piz' Piznarski) "These guys were all like, "as long as she's got a pair of -- " You know, it was indelicate."
  • (Veronica) "What's indelicate about shoes?"
  • (Emi) "You've got the AC on full. If you want to see my nipples, just ask."
  • (Veronica Mars) "We're talking monkey? As in --"
  • (Cindy 'Mac' Mackenzie) "Touch my."
  • (Pauline Elliot) "It's not just any monkey."
  • (Veronica Mars) "Please tell me he plays piano."
  • (Pauline Elliot) "Twenty-five is a genetically altered capuchin monkey. Its uptake-inhibitor proteins have been coded to allow us to monitor cholesterol breakdown at a cellular level."
  • (Pauline Elliot) "And he can play "Chopsticks.""

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