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Die, Mommie, Die! Quotes

Die, Mommie, Die! is a television show that debuted in 1970 . Die, Mommie, Die! ended its run in 1970.

It features Dante Di Loreto as producer, Dennis McCarthy (composer) in charge of musical score, and Kelly Evans as head of cinematography.

Die, Mommie, Die! is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Die, Mommie, Die! is 94 minutes long. Die, Mommie, Die! is distributed by Sundance Channel (United States).

The cast includes: Natasha Lyonne as Edith Sussman, Jason Priestley as Tony Parker, Charles Busch as Angela Arden, Stark Sands as Lance Sussman, Philip Baker Hall as Sol Sussman, Frances Conroy as Bootsie Carp, and Victor Raider-Wexler as Sam Fishbein.

Die, Mommie, Die! Quotes

Charles Busch as Angela Arden

  • (Charles Busch) "Bootsie, remove some of these floral tributes. They're wilting and I can't bear to be surrounded by more death."
  • (Frances Conroy) "I think I'll put some of these petals in the pages of my bible."
  • (Charles Busch) "As you wish."
  • (Charles Busch) "Where is Edith? We're going to be late for the funeral."
  • (Frances Conroy) "I do worry about that child. But as my wise uncle Enoch used to say, "As ketchup is to meatloaf, so sorrow is a condiment to joy.""
  • (Charles Busch) "I hate this house. I hate these walls -- I hate that sofa. The only part of this dump that doesn't make me puke is that door; because that's the way I'm gettin' out."
  • (Charles Busch) "And that goes for all of you. I'm clearin' out the dead wood."
  • (Charles Busch) "This is as good a time as any to announce that I'm selling the house to the first bidder."
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "You wouldn't."
  • (Charles Busch) "Edith, I don't want to hear a word about it. I am sick and tired of living my life for others. This is a time for Angela Arden. This time it's for me, for Me, for ME."
  • (Stark Sands) "But mother --"
  • (Charles Busch) "I hate this house, I hate these walls, I hate that sofa -- The only part of this dump that doesn't make me puke is that door, because that's the way I'm gettin' out."
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "You can't sell this house."
  • (Charles Busch) "I'm bringing down these walls around us. To quote the kids in the ghetto, "Burn, baby, burn.""
  • (Charles Busch) "You're very tight. You must do your utmost to relax."
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "Relax? How can I relax with a nuclear warhead up my rectum?"
  • (Charles Busch) "Darling daughter, you sound like a square from Squaresville."
  • (Charles Busch) "Sweetie? Sweetie, these angels need to be walked."
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "Translation: Get the hell out of here so I could be shrew to your father in private."

Natasha Lyonne as Edith Sussman

  • (Natasha Lyonne) "You seem so sad and tired since you got back from Spain. What's wrong, daddy? You can tell me. We're soul mates."
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "Well, then I'll confide in you. It's just this God-awful constipation. Before I go to sleep I'm supposed to take a suppository. Well, nobody ever said it was gonna' be easy being an old Jew."
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "How dare you show your face in this house less than 24 hours after my father's death?"
  • (Jason Priestley) "Sorry you feel that way, Edie. But perhaps -- I can be of some comfort to your mother."
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "Well I'm afraid you can't. Mother's out with my brother Lance. He's helping her adjust to her new widowhood."
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "- What kind of a crazy world is this? My father's dead, and my mother's gigolo shows up, ready for some hot action?"
  • (Jason Priestley) "I suppose I deserved that. Would you believe, the last thing I wanted to do was betray your father?"
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "Oh -- like REALLY."
  • (Jason Priestley) "I don't ask your forgiveness -- it's almost as if I didn't have a choice. Your mother is a sorceress. She casts a hypnotic spell over a man. You possess that same magic, Edie."
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "I do?"
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "No -- you're not to be trusted."

Frances Conroy as Bootsie Carp

  • (Frances Conroy) "Mrs. S, it's best that I go. You're much too fragile, and way too famous."
  • (Unnamed) "Mrs. Sussman, that'll be all for now. You've been very helpful."
  • (Charles Busch) "And you're a delight. I can't get over -- you're all so darned good looking. You could be actors."
  • (Frances Conroy) "You've never fooled me. You're nothing but trash washed over the Canadian border."

Stark Sands as Lance Sussman

  • (Stark Sands) "Edie, aren't you gonna' eat your cole slaw?"
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "It's time you faced the truth: our mother murdered our father."
  • (Stark Sands) "Hold the coleslaw --"
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "She poisoned him."
  • (Stark Sands) "He died of a heart attack."
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "Oh, many rich old men that die of heart attacks are really the victims of arsenic poisoning. Tony told me so."
  • (Stark Sands) "When did he tell you that?"
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "It doesn't matter."
  • (Stark Sands) "Well, Bootsie told me she was with the coroner when he performed the autopsy. There was no trace of arsenic in his stomach."
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "What if mother was clever and found another way to slip him the arsenic? A method devised to bypass the digestive track?"
  • (Stark Sands) "I'm confused --"
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "The night daddy died he was complaining of constipation. The doctor prescribed a powerful suppository. Suppose mother found a way of tampering with the laxative?"
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "I don't believe it."
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "You are Sol Sussman's only son. It's up to you to avenge his death."
  • (Stark Sands) "What do you want me to do?"
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "Kill mother."
  • (Stark Sands) "No."
  • (Stark Sands) "Arrrrh."
  • (Charles Busch) "Lance. You scared the bejesus out of me."
  • (Stark Sands) "Kiss me, you beautiful creature."
  • (Stark Sands) "Do I smell pot?"
  • (Stark Sands) "Gee, mom, you got me on that one."
  • (Charles Busch) "Listen, baby, I'm not one of your friends' square old ladies. I toured with a band. I'm quite familiar with reefer, and fully acquainted with its dangers."
  • (Stark Sands) "You're the coolest mom ever."
  • (Charles Busch) "What are you doing home from school?"
  • (Stark Sands) "The anti-war demonstration -- yeah. Students took over the president's office, they sent the rest of us kids home."
  • (Charles Busch) "Oh, really?"
  • (Stark Sands) "My friend Ruth -- gave the associate dean a saltwater enema."
  • (Charles Busch) "I need a drink."
  • (Charles Busch) "Scotch for me, Pepsi for you."
  • (Stark Sands) "Mom."
  • (Charles Busch) "Oh, I suppose a "splash" of bourbon won't kill ya'."
  • (Stark Sands) "Buster, if you want any singin' outta me, you better haul out that bratwurst and spread some mustard on it."

Jason Priestley as Tony Parker

  • (Jason Priestley) "I heard your father died of a massive heart attack."
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "So they said. But there's something not right about it."
  • (Jason Priestley) "Being a man of the world, I have friends in interesting places. Mind if I -- do a little leg work?"
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "Yeah, sure -- But I thought you were under mother's spell?"
  • (Jason Priestley) "Haven't you heard? There's a new witch in town."
  • (Jason Priestley) "Edie; lovely, smooth, sweet Edie. I want to know everything about you: your favorite color, your favorite movie star -- do you think your mother killed your father?"
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "Canary yellow, Carole Lynley, and yes, I know she did it but I can't prove a thing -- Oh. Tony, I think you just broke my hymen --"

Philip Baker Hall as Sol Sussman

  • (Philip Baker Hall) "There were extenuating circumstances -- Well, you're not in the movie business so you wouldn't understand. These things were beyond my control -- What?"
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "-"
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "It's impossible -- You gotta' give me -- You gotta' -- Please. Oh, God --"
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "Oh my God --. Oh my God --. Oh my God --. Oh my God --."
  • (Frances Conroy) "Are you sick, Mr. S? Should I call Dr. Mendell?"
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "No, no -- Nathan Mendell I don't need."
  • (Frances Conroy) "Talk to Bootsie. Let her help."
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "-"
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "I -- I -- I'm out of date. I'm out of touch. My kind of movies' pleas for tolerance of the Jew or the Negro or the immigrant Italian are made a mockery of today. These kids in the beards, they seek to tear down the Establishment. When the f*** did I become the Establishment?"
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "You're a great man, Mr. S."
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "I'm finished. I'm kaput. Bootsie, the only way I could finance this film was to borrow money from -- "less than reputable" associates."
  • (Frances Conroy) "The "Mob"?"
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "The gods have turned against me. The rotten weather, an actress dying and -- now the film has fallen apart. They're threatening to give me a bath in cement if I don't pay up. Bootsie, you're lookin' at a corpse."
  • (Frances Conroy) ""He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty." Proverbs, 16."
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "It's Angela. She's a witch. She put a curse on me. Oh, God. Oh, God. God, God, God, God --"
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "Never forget that you're half Sussman. And the other half, that strange, Canadian goyish of flotsam -- that, you can dismiss."
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "It's your blood that I'm proud of."
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "You are my daughter, my immortality. What is our motto?"
  • (Natasha Lyonne) "Make it big -- give it Class -- and leave 'em with a message."
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "Yeah."
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "Lance, just DRINK the god****ed soup."
  • (Stark Sands) "Sorry, daddy."
  • (Charles Busch) "I don't blame you. The soup stinks."
  • (Stark Sands) "It smell like dirty socks."
  • (Charles Busch) "Bootsie cuts your dad's socks up and throws them in the soup."
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "God DAMMIT. You eat normal, or we're gonna' shut you away in an institution."
  • (Stark Sands) "No, daddy, don't --"
  • (Charles Busch) "How dare you speak to your son like that."
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "I'm ashamed to have such a son."
  • (Charles Busch) "The "great man". The "conscience" of the Industry. How about a little sympathy and tolerance for your own family?"
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "I have NO sympathy for you, baby. And none for him, either."
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "My son, the Loser."
  • (Stark Sands) "YOU'RE the Loser. The FLOP."
  • (Charles Busch) "Lance --"
  • (Philip Baker Hall) "Monsters. They get put to sleep tomorrow. Sit down, Angela -- SIT DOWN."

Victor Raider-Wexler as Sam Fishbein

  • (Victor Raider-Wexler) "Let us mourn the loss of a "warrior king," felled not in the field of battle, but by coronary thrombosis. As a producer myself, I would have preferred to see a man with Sol Sussman's stature lying in state: a draped catafalque, burning tapers -- It distresses me that such a man should be hurriedly cremated like a mongrel DOG at the pound."
  • (Frances Conroy) "Amen. At last the truth is spoken."

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