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Jiminy Glick in Lalawood Quotes

Jiminy Glick in Lalawood is a television program that first aired in 1970 . Jiminy Glick in Lalawood ended its run in 1970.

It features Bernie Brillstein as producer, David Nessim Lawrence in charge of musical score, and Mike Fox as head of cinematography.

Jiminy Glick in Lalawood is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Jiminy Glick in Lalawood is distributed by MGM Distribution Co..

The cast includes: Martin Short as Jiminy Glick, John Michael Higgins as Andre Devine, Corey Pearson as Ben DiCarlo, Jan Hooks as Dixie Glick, and Elizabeth Perkins as Miranda Coolidge.

Jiminy Glick in Lalawood Quotes

John Michael Higgins as Andre Devine

  • (John Michael Higgins) "Quick; we have to make a tea from her own clothing."
  • (John Michael Higgins) "Andre has new hole, on his front."
  • (John Michael Higgins) "You are like a terrible mexican woman with a radio in her p*****."
  • (John Michael Higgins) "I'm on my knees like a German teenager."
  • (John Michael Higgins) "Reach into my asshole and grab my wallet."
  • (John Michael Higgins) "I have give two blowjobs to English Insurance people, I am not homo-ist, I am man. I am on my knees like German teenager to English people with wrotten teeth in their mouths."
  • (John Michael Higgins) "No one is looking at your great performance, Why? Because you are in corner sucking on a ice statue of Ving Rhames. You are like a terrifying asian woman who is covered with piss."
  • (John Michael Higgins) "What a crappy movie hey? I've made better s*** than this, in my own toilet."
  • (John Michael Higgins) "You know Ben DiCarlo?"
  • (Elizabeth Perkins) "We met in Vegas at ShoWest years ago."
  • (John Michael Higgins) "ShoWest? A strip club? You show your puss?"
  • (John Michael Higgins) "Natalie, Baby, you're a beautiful women, why do you speak? You look great. People in the room say 'look at the girl; she has wonderful tits, I go upstairs alone and I rub against things.'"

Martin Short as Jiminy Glick

  • (Martin Short) "If it's human waste, save some for me."
  • (Martin Short) "That's a phallic-looking thing. Remind you of anybody?"
  • (Jan Hooks) "No."
  • (Martin Short) "Oprah Winfrey, how do you do what you do so consistently?"
  • (Unnamed) "I stomp on everyone I can."
  • (Martin Short) "And you're despised by so many. But not by me."
  • (Unnamed) "I live for that. And remember to spell my name right. O-P-E-R-A."
  • (Martin Short) "My, that's a nice beaver."
  • (Jan Hooks) "Why, thank you."
  • (Martin Short) "No."
  • (Jan Hooks) "Oh."
  • (Martin Short) "Although yours is nicely -- shaped."
  • (Martin Short) "And you're Canadian, I hear. What's that about?"
  • (Unnamed) "Well this is a fantastic country. Uhm. What's that about?"
  • (Martin Short) "That was my question dear."
  • (Unnamed) "I know. I'm trying to -- I've never actually had to --"
  • (Martin Short) "Eventually the show will start. Don't you wanna just finally answer it?"
  • (Unnamed) "Yeah, what's that about? For me it's been a fantastic -- it's where I come from, and it's um --"
  • (Martin Short) "What?"
  • (Unnamed) "Canada."
  • (Martin Short) "You're Canadian? I didn't know that."
  • (Unnamed) "Yes, it's true."
  • (Martin Short) "Isn't it amazing, just 6 months ago, when I was talking to Arlene Shayhee, I was so bored. Here I am talking to Brat-packer Rob Lowe --"
  • (Unnamed) "I -- me -- me -- I -- I -- me -- I --"
  • (Martin Short) "-- and I'm equally bored. What have I learned, I wonder. Ah yes, celebrities can be dull."
  • (Martin Short) "I'm one of those guys that needs it regular, ya know? Sometimes Dixie's awake for it, most of the time she's not."
  • (Corey Pearson) "Ambien and some KY, right?"
  • (Martin Short) "HAH. Ambien and KY. You know, for the longest time I was taking the KY orally. It's not necessary."

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