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Good Neighbor Sam Quotes

Good Neighbor Sam is a TV show that debuted in 1970 . Good Neighbor Sam ended in 1970.

It features David Swift as producer, Frank De Vol in charge of musical score, and Burnett Guffey; A.S.C. as head of cinematography.

Good Neighbor Sam is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Good Neighbor Sam is 130 minutes long. Good Neighbor Sam is distributed by Columbia Pictures.

The cast includes: Linda Watkins as Edna, Jack Lemmon as Sam Bissell, Dorothy Provine as Minerva Bissell, Edward Andrews as Mr. Burke, Edward G. Robinson as Simon Nurdlinger, Romy Schneider as Janet Lagerlof, Michael Connors as Howard Ebbets, and Louis Nye as Reinhold Shiffner.

Good Neighbor Sam Quotes

Michael Connors as Howard Ebbets

  • (Michael Connors) "Do you have any mambo records?"
  • (Dorothy Provine) "And cha-cha."
  • (Michael Connors) "Oh, cha-cha too. That's great."
  • (Michael Connors) "Say, listen, Minzie, you know, honey, we never would have made this hand if he hadn't made the wrong discard."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Yes, you said that before, didn't you."
  • (Michael Connors) "Say, he's sensitive, isn't he?"
  • (Dorothy Provine) "Very. He's creative."
  • (Michael Connors) "You know, some of the happiest days of my life were spent fighting with that little girl."
  • (Michael Connors) "Hey, Goofy. I love you. You know, it's taken me all these months to realize how much. What do you say we try it again, huh?"
  • (Michael Connors) "Those are my pajamas."
  • (Romy Schneider) "Yes."
  • (Michael Connors) "Why those are the pajamas you bought me the weekend we drove to Carmel. And now you've given them to this gigolo?"
  • (Romy Schneider) "Oh. Don't get all sentimental over a pair of pajamas."

Dorothy Provine as Minerva Bissell

  • (Dorothy Provine) "Wait a minute. Of course. There's a very simple way to get Sam across to your house without being seen."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Well, what are you going to do? Shoot me out of a cannon, dear?"
  • (Dorothy Provine) "Don't be silly, dear. We don't even have a cannon."
  • (Dorothy Provine) "You know what I miss the most?"
  • (Jack Lemmon) "What?"
  • (Dorothy Provine) "My feet get so cold."
  • (Dorothy Provine) "Howie and I are gonna play cards. He's really a lot of fun, Sam."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "I bet. What kind of cards?"
  • (Dorothy Provine) "Honeymoon bridge."
  • (Dorothy Provine) "Of all the silly things for me to do. After being married to you all these years. I couldn't walk out on you, my baby. I'm so used to your silly face, your goofy ways."
  • (Dorothy Provine) "Now, if that man shows up tonight, be careful. Don't fight him."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "No, don't worry. I'm not afraid of him."
  • (Dorothy Provine) "I know. But, just be careful."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Good night, love."
  • (Dorothy Provine) "Now, isn't this awful. Here I am kissing you good night and you're going across to spend the night with another woman. A very attractive woman. Be careful."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "I told you, I'm not afraid of him."
  • (Dorothy Provine) "I don't mean him, I mean her."

Edward G. Robinson as Simon Nurdlinger

  • (Edward G. Robinson) "You know, a man needs a foundation on which to build an immaculate life. Mrs. Nurdlinger and I, we detest the philanderer and the infidelity which some men live by."
  • (Romy Schneider) "Oh, yes, so it is with Sam and I."
  • (Edward G. Robinson) "You wouldn't believe some of the degenerate pursuits of some of the people in our society. But God will deal with the whoremonger and the profited. Their days are numbered. Isaiah, verse six."
  • (Romy Schneider) "Amen."
  • (Edward G. Robinson) "Libertinism and liquor. Impurity and wantonness."

Linda Watkins as Edna

  • (Linda Watkins) "Like it? What the hell is it?"

Jack Lemmon as Sam Bissell

  • (Denise Bissell) "Did you know that Grandma takes her teeth out before she goes to bed, Daddy? Could I please take my teeth out when I get bigger? Please, Daddy?"
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Yes. Things are back to normal."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Good, clean-living, family type men, don't go around making love with their next door neighbors on the street corners."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "He took a shower?"
  • (Dorothy Provine) "Well, of course. Didn't you take a shower at Janet's?"
  • (Jack Lemmon) "No, I didn't take a shower at Jan -- What do you think I am? Some kind of a sex maniac?"
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Oh, it's ridiculous. Why am I worried about a; madman like that. I know the story. It's typical. Typical. He just took advantage of you. You know, the smooth dancer, the fancy dresser, you were young and naive, and you thought he was a swell fella because he never made a pass at you and then you marry him and you find out why. Mama's boy. A pretty Mama's boy are all wind up and no pitch, as we used to say. It's a sad facet of American life."
  • (Romy Schneider) "Oh, no. He wasn't a Mama's boy. He was quite the contrary."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Don't stand there in my underwear and threaten me."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Has he made a pass at you yet? Well, has he or hasn't he? Well, don't just give me a look. It's not such a ridiculous question. For your information, he is known to be highly oversexed."
  • (Dorothy Provine) "Now?"
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Well, I don't say he takes ads; but, his own wife told me and it made me sick when she did. He's disgusting. Can you imagine what it must be like to be married to a man like that? She's sexually normal."
  • (Dorothy Provine) "Oh?"
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Do you realize I've been in the same traffic jam, going to the same job, everyday for six years and so have they. Everyday all husbands, we get up and we take the same road into the same job; we even dress alike. We put on a gray suit and a hat and a buttoned-down shirt and the; like sheep."

Romy Schneider as Janet Lagerlof

  • (Romy Schneider) "How dare you. Apologize this instant."
  • (Michael Connors) "Apologize?"
  • (Romy Schneider) "Yes."
  • (Michael Connors) "I come here in the middle of the night to find some ape in fluorescent pajamas with my wife in a nightgown."
  • (Romy Schneider) "Of course, I'm in a nightgown. What else would I be wearing in the middle of the night?"
  • (Romy Schneider) "You must be Sam. I'm Min's friend, Janet. Janet Lagerlof."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "How do you do, Mrs. Lagerlof?"
  • (Romy Schneider) "How do you do? I mean, I mean, Lagerlof is only my, my maiden name. Until my divorce is final, I am still Mrs. Howard Ebbets."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Oh, how do you do, Mrs. Ebbets?"
  • (Romy Schneider) "How do you do? Nice to see you."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Nice to; see you. Well, look, I don't want to disturb your shower. Can I get you anything? Soap or --"
  • (Romy Schneider) "No, no. Thank you. I have everything."
  • (Jack Lemmon) "Make yourself at home."
  • (Romy Schneider) "Remember what I always said in school? There are some girls born to be single. Well, I'm one of them. I just love being free. Not that marriage isn't good for other girls. It obviously agrees with you, Min. You know, I expected you to look all married and plump and I don't now. You're divine."
  • (Romy Schneider) "I tell you something, Min. Every girl should be married to Howard Ebbet at least once. It is like hitting your head against the wall; it feels so good when it stops. Leaving him was the most wonderful thing that ever happened to me. It absolutely restored my faith in divorce."

Louis Nye as Reinhold Shiffner

  • (Louis Nye) "It's the same old story. The wandering husband, bored with his brunette wife, sneaks over to pay a little visit to the hot looking blonde cookie next door. Oooo. Oooo. You probably have been doin' it for months."

Edward Andrews as Mr. Burke

  • (Edward Andrews) ""For The Masculine Way Of Life; Nurdlinger Eggs" The gentlemen has it at just the right curve. We imply it without actually hitting them over the head with it. You see, Mr. Nurdlinger, what we're gearing up to here is to touch that psychological nerve in all men. The symbol of masculinity and fertility: the egg."

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