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Mouse Hunt Quotes

Mouse Hunt is a television program that appeared on TV in 1970 . Mouse Hunt ended in 1970.

It features Bruce Cohen, Tony Ludwig, and Alan Riche as producer, Alan Silvestri in charge of musical score, and Phedon Papamichael as head of cinematography.

Mouse Hunt is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Mouse Hunt is 98 minutes long. Mouse Hunt is distributed by DreamWorks Pictures.

The cast includes: Lee Evans as Lars, Nathan Lane as Ernie, Christopher Walken as Caesar, Maury Chaykin as Alexander, Vicki Lewis as April Smuntz, Debra Christofferson as Ingrid, Lee Evans as Lars Smuntz, and Nathan Lane as Ernest Smuntz.

Mouse Hunt Quotes

Nathan Lane as Ernie

  • (Nathan Lane) "Just think of all the trouble we could have saved ourselves if we just threw fruit at him in the first place."
  • (Nathan Lane) "When Quincy Thorpe of the Historical Society told us the value of this house, you, uh, could have KNOCKED us over with a feather. We, uh, we didn't know what HIT US. The house was in terrible disrepair, but it was nothing that a few NAILS -- and some old fashioned elbow grease couldn't fix."
  • (Nathan Lane) "He's Hitler with a tail. He's "The Omen" with whiskers. Even Nostradamus didn't see him coming."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Hey, merry Christmas."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Yeah, I was on top once, too. But there's only one way to go from there, and that's down, baby, down."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Hasta la vista, you little rat bastard."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Well -- I almost feel sorry for the little fella."
  • (Lee Evans) "Almost."
  • (Nathan Lane) ""Catzilla"?"
  • (Maury, the Cat Care Society Owner) "Oh, you know the guys who clean up call him that. But you can call him anything you want. I'd say he looks more like a "Fluffy.""
  • (Lee Evans) "Aw, poor little Catzilla. You want a home, don't you? You want to get out of here. Well, you're gonna have to kill, kill, kill for it."
  • (Nathan Lane) "You're a stupid cat, aren't you? Yes, you are. And you're ugly, too --"
  • (Lee Evans) "Oh, you little bastard."
  • (Nathan Lane) "We'll take him."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Duck a l'Orange avec du quack sauce. And for ze Mayor, la specialty de la maison, Lobster Loaf a la Ernst ou la bibliotheque."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Caeser. Are you all right? Try to think, did you catch that mouse?"
  • (Christopher Walken) "What's that? Horse? Fiendish. I won't eat it."
  • (Christopher Walken) "Aaaagh."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Light a match; they're frightened by fire."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Come on. You loved string."
  • (Lee Evans) "I didn't love string."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Well, you could have fooled me. You and Pop were always huddled together running some piece of something through your fingers. It didn't matter what I did. I didn't even exist. I made him my special rack of lamb for his 70th birthday."
  • (Lee Evans) "Oh, no."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Yes. You remember. I slaved over that meal, making sure everything was perfect. Did he say, "Thanks, Ernie, it was delicious"? No. He only noticed the string I had tied it with."
  • (Nathan Lane) "I'm gonna build an Olympic-sized swimming pool and fill it with pina coladas and a college sorority."
  • (Nathan Lane) "I hate you."
  • (Lee Evans) "And I hate you."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Not as much as I hate you."
  • (Lee Evans) "Yeah."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Yeah, DOUBLE. DOUBLE. Oh, give me something."
  • (Nathan Lane) "I'm gonna brain you."
  • (Lee Evans) "'Ere it is."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Oh, yeah. Give it to me then. Go ahead."
  • (Nathan Lane) "You killed him."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Shh. He's goin' for the cherries."
  • (Lee Evans) "I thought you said mice like Gouda."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Not in the morning. Cheese tires them out. They need fruit for energy."
  • (Nathan Lane) "I like to use both sides of my brain"
  • (Nathan Lane) "No capers? But that's just grilled cheese. What's the point? Why don't they eat out of a trough."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Which one of you palateless sheep sent my sandwich back?"
  • (Nathan Lane) "I don't think we're dealing with an ordinary mouse."

Christopher Walken as Caesar

  • (Christopher Walken) "I've activated the Squeak Seeker 2000."
  • (Christopher Walken) "You have to get inside their mind. You have to know what they want, need. You have to think -- like a mouse."

Lee Evans as Lars

  • (Lee Evans) "We made love in a way I've-I've only ever seen in nature films."
  • (Lee Evans) "I don't believe it. He snapped the trap, ate the olive and left the pit just to mock us."
  • (Nathan Lane) "I think you're giving him a little too much credit. Mice don't mock. They don't have a sense of humor or irony. He's not sitting in his hole in a smoking jacket sipping cognac, and giggling to himself, "I left the pit." The trap snapped itself, the olive flew off and he ate it. It's just that simple. But now that he knows we're here, he won't come within a mile of us. I don't think we'll be seeing any more of that --"
  • (Nathan Lane) "MOUSE."
  • (Lee Evans) "Damn, that mouse stinks."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Dead animals always do."
  • (Lee Evans) "Look. You blew a hole in the floor."
  • (Nathan Lane) "And I distinctly remember somebody yelling, "Shoot. Shoot.""
  • (Lee Evans) "Yeah, well you never listened to me before."
  • (Lee Evans) "Look, he's still breathing."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Well, kill him. Find a blunt object."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Let him have it."
  • (Nathan Lane) "What the hell are you waiting for?"
  • (Lee Evans) "I can't just hit him with a shovel."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Why not?"
  • (Lee Evans) "Well, look at him, he's pathetic."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Pathetic? He's Hitler with a tail. This is The Omen with whiskers. Nostradamus didn't see this thing coming."
  • (Lee Evans) "Ernie, he's a living thing --"
  • (Nathan Lane) "Not for long, give me that."
  • (Nathan Lane) "I CAN'T."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Look at him just lying there. It just doesn't feel very sportsmanlike."
  • (Lee Evans) "We'd better do something quick, I think he's coming to."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Aw -- I forgot to put holes in the box."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Hasta la vista, you little rat bastard."
  • (Lee Evans) "You used to love string."
  • (Vicki Lewis) "That was before, when I was dating the son of wealthy string magnate. Not now when I am married to the half owner of a worthless deathtrap."
  • (Lee Evans) "Wow, did you feel that?"
  • (Nathan Lane) "What?"
  • (Lee Evans) "I got a chill. You should never talk about Pop like that."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Really? What's this do for you?"
  • (Nathan Lane) "Thanks for nothing, you string-sucking old loon."
  • (Lee Evans) "He didn't mean it, Pop."
  • (Lee Evans) "Please, April, don't go."
  • (Vicki Lewis) "I'm not going anywhere."
  • (Lee Evans) "Hold your end up higher, you're not holding it."
  • (Nathan Lane) "I am too."
  • (Lee Evans) "You are not."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Don't worry about me. Hey, isn't that suit charcoal?"
  • (Lee Evans) "No."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Looks charcoal gray to me, some gray polyester blend. Couldn't even find a black suit for your own father's funeral."
  • (Lee Evans) "It's black."
  • (Nathan Lane) "No, I'm sure it's gray."
  • (Lee Evans) "It's black."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Gray."
  • (Lee Evans) "Black."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Gray."
  • (Lee Evans) "Black."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Fine, it's black. It's the grayest black I've ever seen."
  • (Lee Evans) "It doesn't matter what color it is."
  • (Lee Evans) "I'm sorry, Pop. I'm sorry."
  • (Lee Evans) "Don't you think this is a little much?"
  • (Nathan Lane) "Never underestimate your opponent. Let's say he has mastered a way to empty a mousetrap without getting caught. If he snaps one of these babies, a chain reaction will start snapping them all. He'll panic, and the law of averages says one of them has to nab him."
  • (Lee Evans) "Not bad."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Yes, well, I like to use both sides of my brain. Come on, let's hit the sack."
  • (Lee Evans) "Ernie, are you okay? I came as soon as I heard."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Why are you wearing a pink overcoat?"
  • (Lee Evans) "Because April gave us the 1200 dollars."
  • (Lee Evans) "Some things are more important than money, Ernie."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Notice it's always the financially challenged who say that?"
  • (Lee Evans) "A world without string is chaos."

Vicki Lewis as April Smuntz

  • (Vicki Lewis) "Does a wife need a reason to visit?"
  • (Vicki Lewis) "I didn't know you were entertaining."
  • (Nathan Lane) "Don't you mean ex wife?"
  • (Vicki Lewis) "That remains to be seen."

Maury Chaykin as Alexander

  • (Maury Chaykin) "There's a lot of Eurotrash out there scarfin' up the shrimps."
  • (Maury Chaykin) "I own eveything of LaRue. His books, his letters."
  • (Maury Chaykin) "You see these shoes?"
  • (Lee Evans) "LaRue's?"
  • (Maury Chaykin) "No, but I'm sure he would have loved them."
  • (Maury Chaykin) "You know, it would be a shame if you boys put on this auction and nobody bid."

Debra Christofferson as Ingrid

  • (Debra Christofferson) "Hilde, the spool is smoking."

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