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Sleeper (1973 film) Quotes

Sleeper (1973 film) is a television program that first aired in 1970 . Sleeper stopped airing in 1970.

It features Jack Grossberg as producer, Woody Allen in charge of musical score, and David M. Walsh as head of cinematography.

Sleeper (1973 film) is recorded in English and originally aired in United States. Each episode of Sleeper (1973 film) is 87 minutes long. Sleeper (1973 film) is distributed by United Artists.

The cast includes: Woody Allen as Miles Monroe, Diane Keaton as Luna Schlosser, Woody Allen as Miles, Diane Keaton as Luna, and John Beck as Erno Windt.

Sleeper (1973 film) Quotes

John Beck as Erno Windt

  • (John Beck) "Oy, gevalt. What will the goyim say."

Woody Allen as Miles Monroe

  • (Woody Allen) "I haven't seen my analyst in 200 years. He was a strict Freudian. If I'd been going all this time, I'd probably almost be cured by now."
  • (Woody Allen) "You're a sucker. What you didn't realize is that you're dealing with one of the greatest minds you've ever seen."
  • (Diane Keaton) "Yeah, and his isn't so bad either."
  • (Woody Allen) "Science is an intellectual dead end, you know? It's a lot of little guys in tweed suits cutting up frogs on foundation grants."
  • (Woody Allen) "Never Clone Alone."
  • (Woody Allen) "I'm always joking, you should know that about me; it's a defense mechanism."
  • (Woody Allen) "This stuff tastes awful. I could make a fortune selling it in my health food store."
  • (Woody Allen) "You remind me of Lisa Sorenson"
  • (Diane Keaton) "Who?"
  • (Woody Allen) "An old girlfriend from the village. A Trotskyite, who became a Jesus freak, and was arrested for selling pornographic connect-the-dot books."
  • (Woody Allen) "My God. I beat a man insensible with a strawberry."
  • (Woody Allen) "That's a big chicken."
  • (Woody Allen) "Is he housebroken, or is he going to leave batteries all over the floor?"
  • (Woody Allen) "I'm not really the heroic type. I was beat up by Quakers."
  • (Dr. Melik) "Why, they could torture you for months; what could you possibly tell them, you don't know anything --"
  • (Woody Allen) "Only my name, rank, serial number -- and YOUR name."
  • (Woody Allen) "My brain? It's my second favorite organ."
  • (Unnamed) "We weren't sure at first what to make of this, but we developed a theory: we feel that when people committed great crimes against the state, they were forced to watch this."
  • (Woody Allen) "Yes. That's exactly what it was."
  • (Woody Allen) "Perform sex? Uh, uh, I don't think I'm up to a performance, but I'll rehearse with you, if you like."
  • (Diane Keaton) "Okay. I just thought you might want to; they have a machine here."
  • (Woody Allen) "Machine? I'm not getting into that thing. I, I'm strictly a hand operator; you know, I, I -- I don't like anything with moving parts that are not my own."
  • (Woody Allen) "I'm a clarinet player in 1973, I go into the hospital for a lousy operation, I wake up 200 years later and I'm Flash Gordon."
  • (Woody Allen) "I don't know what the hell I'm doing here. I'm 237 years old, I should be collecting social security."
  • (Woody Allen) "What kind of government you guys got here? This is worse than California."
  • (Woody Allen) "Look, you gotta be kidding. I wanna go back to sleep. If I don't get at least 600 years, I'm grouchy all day."
  • (Woody Allen) "We're here to see the nose. I hear it was running."
  • (Woody Allen) "What's that? Are there strange futuristic creatures out here that I don't know about? Like something with the body of a crab and the head of a Social Worker?"
  • (Woody Allen) "Are there female robots? Because the possibilities are limitless."

Diane Keaton as Luna Schlosser

  • (Diane Keaton) "What's it feel like to be dead for 200 years?"
  • (Woody Allen) "Like spending a weekend in Beverly Hills."
  • (Diane Keaton) "Oh, I see. You don't believe in science, and you also don't believe that political systems work, and you don't believe in God, huh?"
  • (Woody Allen) "Right."
  • (Diane Keaton) "So then, what do you believe in?"
  • (Woody Allen) "Sex and death; two things that come once in a lifetime -- but at least after death, you're not nauseous."
  • (Diane Keaton) "Please. I wanna go home. I'm getting a headache. I'm hungry. I haven't had a stress pill. I haven't had a bath in 7 hours. I'm telling you, I'm not accustomed to this."
  • (Diane Keaton) "Miles, do you know that "God" spelled backwards is "dog"?"
  • (Woody Allen) "So?"
  • (Diane Keaton) "It makes you think."
  • (Woody Allen) "Luna, help me push the car."
  • (Diane Keaton) "Would you like to perform sex with me?"
  • (Woody Allen) "Perform sex? I don't think I'm up to performing, but I would rehearse with you if you'd like."
  • (Diane Keaton) "You were screaming out different names in your sleep."
  • (Woody Allen) "I was having sexual nightmares."
  • (Diane Keaton) "Herald, it's wonderful. Oh, you shouldn't have, really."
  • (Herald Cohen) "Ijust thought you'd like it."
  • (Diane Keaton) "Oh, it's keen. It-it's pure keen. No"
  • (Diane Keaton) "No, it's greater than keen --"
  • (Diane Keaton) "it's 'Cugat'."
  • (Diane Keaton) "You're biting my nails."
  • (Woody Allen) "It's because you're tense."
  • (Diane Keaton) "I'm great physically. I got a Ph.D. in oral sex."
  • (Woody Allen) "Yeah, they make you take any Spanish with that?"
  • (Diane Keaton) "Miles, I wrote a song about the revolution."
  • (Woody Allen) "There's not going to be any revolution, unless we stop the Aries Project."
  • (Diane Keaton) "Don't you worry about that; you just relax. Now, listen:"
  • (Diane Keaton) "Rebels are we. Born to be free. Just like the fish in the sea."
  • (Diane Keaton) ""Regis; register commies, not guns." What's that mean?"
  • (Woody Allen) "What?"
  • (Diane Keaton) ""Register commies, not guns.""
  • (Woody Allen) "Oh, he was probably a member of the National Rifle Association. There was a group that helped criminals get guns so they could shoot citizens. It was a public service."
  • (Diane Keaton) "It's hard to believe that you haven't had sex for 200 years."
  • (Woody Allen) "204, if you count my marriage."

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